www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Capo,

I don't know who is a bigger cynic you or me but my life experiences have shown me never trust a women with important maters period. I know a few true blue ones but it is so rare is it worth the risk. I have been with some that were begging to get married with me only to find their secret papers that showed what they were really upto. YOu know I wasn't even mad I just laughed because at least I expected this.

I think you are better off if you just live in the real world & expect the worst & if anything better than that happens its a bonus.

Wow.. this is an interesting thread. You guys have drawn me in again. I was going to stay sidelined for the rest of this thread. Let me start by agreeing with this

Obviously, my chica has sex for a living. What I could not put up with is when she says she's taking the night off and I can call anytime. I call and no answer or phone busy etc.. as if I'm stupid. Amazingly, she will answer at the "usual" time. It used to bug me all the time. Now, I know I can not control what goes on when I'm not there so, I don't even worry about it anymore. My mind is much more at ease.

Capo..I don't think that your test was fair. Remember, the society that these girls live in. Even though she has a "good" job it may end tomorrow. I know she can not be making much money working in the mall. She must have other means of support. Is she getting it from her family? A novio? Remember, they live in a world filled with insecurities and instability. The homerun you served up was an offer that couldn't be refused. Maybe she took it so she wouldn't have to ask you for the money. When I get pissed that my girl works EVERY night she always tells me it's either work or you send me money. Well, I guess that ends the conversation. You should be feeling good that she's not asking you. However, as someone else mentioned, maybe this is just the setup for the big financial kill.

But, here is where I think I have finally made some headway in my own life. Regardless of how either party feels about the other. Whether it be love for each other as people. Or love for each other as sexual beings. Or love for money. When money exchanges hands for sexual services, there is no way of ever bringing the relationship back to what we know as "normal." I dare anyone to disagree with that statement. If you build a new home on quicksand, guess what eventually happens to the house? I realize cultural differences come into play so, this is only MHO. The mere fact that she has even worked in the sex trade should be 2.5 strikes out of 3 strikes. People make mistakes in judgement, we all do. You seem like a great guy with an open heart. Having a novia in someplace like Costa Rica is NOT for you. Take it from me. You have to be either extremely comfortable with yourself and trusting (which admittedly, you are not). Or you have to be as jaded as they are. Just my opinions.

dapanz1

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Paradise= Sitting outside the Bodega in Panama City about 1 am. Drinking cool Balboas with cool friends and blazin' hot Colombianas. I want to be there..RIGHT NOW!

I don't understand the concept. Why in the world would you even consider having one of these girls as your real world girlfriends? They are fantasies come true. I'am mid 40's, good shape and still able to shake it up, but I think your playing with fire thinking a 20 year old hottie is the girl for you.

I think it's great that you can have a GF that gives you all the attention while you are in CR, But leave it at the front door.

Despite what I jokingly said earlier, I don't think Capo is really a bad guy. I just think he's being a tad unfair in this case. And I don't think this girl is really a bad girl either. She was doing what she thought she had to do and she made a mistake as people her age (or any age for that matter) often do.

And I don't think Capo deliberately set her up to fail, though I suspect a bigger part of him than he admits feared she would. I wouldn't call it fear of commitment per se, but there does appear to be something going on in that he historically has felt the need to go to such unusual lengths to test the women he's been about to become involved with. I don't mean to sound judgemental, since I think probably many of us here have similar issues. I'm sure I do.

Let me throw in a few other points. Capo, I realize you had gotten to know her over a TLN and 3 whole weekends, but you were also ready to go back that very next weekend after only one TLN and regardless, that time is hardly a lot to expect such a commitment. Besides you yourself admit were not quite ready to totally commit yourself to not seeing other women (had you stopped seeing your GF back home?), so isn't a little hypocritical to expect as much from her?

I also think dapanz stated very well and succintly one of the things I was alluding to in my prior posts (or intended to).Not only don't I not disagree with that but I agree 200%. (Huh? I think I said that right. How's that for a quadruple negative?)

Attempting to form relationships in such circumstances is undoubtedly even unadvisable for someone with your outlook and background. Some guys can at least deal with the doubt and lack of control of what their "novia" does when they are not around. Personally, I do it by never really considering them a "novia", but a provider (or former provider) with whom I share feelings of affection, friendship and lust (primarily on my part) and financial attraction on her part. I may or may not still act as their client in terms of my financial support of them, but always remember how we met and what they may still be doing with others to get by. Apparently you either lack that trust and/or can not just accept the knowledge that she might stray from the path you prefer her to take.

I think this thread is interesting and hits on the subject of how to handle a long distance relationship.

Since I have had one for a number of months I would like to make a few comments.

1. If you are the jealous, possessive or insecure type of guy forget it.
This will never work for you.

2. Don't rush into a relationship after a few passion filled TLNs. It takes time to get to know people and build trust and understanding.

3. Forget the CIA, I Spy, or Get Smart crap. Either you trust her or you don't.

4. Accept the fact that there is a huge disparity in income levels and there is nothing wrong with helping out someone you care about.

5. If she is lying to you. Forget her. You will do just as well at the DR.

When I go to CR now, I'm spending 2 weeks per trip with my GF and enjoying every minute of it. She's is with me because she wants to be and gives me back so much in return. It's fairly easy for me because again, I don't worry about what I cannot control and I don't worry about what is going to happen down the road. I take it a trip at a time.

So far, everything has been great and it will be 1 year soon that I have known her.

Very Concise and right on Costa. I didnt think guys were so into soap operas and melodrama relationally (I say that with all due respect).

The key is...come for the fantasy, enjoy it, but dont marry it. Take it for what it is worth. If your and her fantasies link up...great. But being jealous or testing of working girls...or any desparate 3rd world girl...just doesnt make sense to me. As I have stated in previous threads...equality in relationships tends to be based on class and cultural equality. Otherwise, the motivations can always be logically challenged. My GF is my GF because she comes from an upper class family in Bogota, was never P4P, has a college degree, and is the "hostess with the mostess" ...

While I usually agree with Prolijo, one statement I have to take acception with is that most guys would easily revert from their mongering ways if they "fell in love". Just like the working girls, I believe the more a guy gets into p4p...it will be harder for him NOT to take advantage over the future...even if he IS in a caring nuturing relationships. I believe this because...most of my friends...even married ones...are mongerers when given the chance . And I'm not just talking the ones in CR.

Hey Capo,

That was one hell of a story. So what do you think would have happened if you had never done the test? Suppose you married her and brought her to the US? Do you think she would have cheated on you? Do you think she would drained your money? Or do you think you would have had Ch*ldren and lived happily ever after? You must have a sense of what would have happened?

At first I also thought your test was harsh. But then I tried to put myself in your shoes, that is, being in love with her and knowing that she was ready to spend 24 hours with another guy, phucking him repeatedly. Your test was appropriate and clever.

Racetrack

Capo,

Thats just my opinion but let me give you some change for my two cents. Stop expecting to find a saint. Women are Phuck ups. In fact everyone is. Dont expect to find a perfect woman because buddy she does not exist. If you dont belive me then look at yourself, you are not perfect, and no other male is perfect so why expect women to always make the right decicion when you know they wont. Because its humanly impossible to be perfect and not Phuck up all the time.

Find someone you can work with and do it. But you wont find her with these "tests" especially ones that are already stacked against them. There is no "one" just somone you are more compatible with and less compatible with. You find a girl and you work on it.

I dont know why its so hard to see that you really didnt want this girl. Hey its cool sometimes we get afraid of getting serious or else well loose the good times. If you did want her then you wouldnt have made up this test. You wouldnt have had a need to. When you truely have feelings for someone testing doesnt even cross your mind. You revel in the feelings.

Just my opinion ofcourse.

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Actually, TMan, we're still not that much in disagreement. You said testing of working girls does not make sense. I said in my first post that it was pointless. You said crossing the line of P4P is like selling your soul to the Devil. I said its more like taking drugs. It doesn't instantly damn you, as in your analogy, but it does get you quickly and increasingly hooked the more and more you take it and the end result is the same.

As for what you perceive to be an exception, perhaps I didn't make myself clear. I never meant to suggest that MOST guys WOULD EASILY revert from their mongering ways if they fell in love, only that some certainly CAN (though not necessarily easily). Actually my first real point was that there is an equivalency in the addictive effects of P4P for both the provider AND the client. On that I'd think you'd agree. In fact MOST guys who have been mongering for any length of time can NOT EASILY give up their mongering IF they can do it at all (same as the hard-core pros at the DR). BUT SOME guys certainly can manage to do it and make that sacrifice for the woman they love IF they haven't already become too active in this sport. And NOW you alluded to much the same thing when you said "the more a guy gets into p4p...it will be harder for him" suggesting the same progressive process that I was describing.

Your intial analogy made the jump into P4P seem like a sharp line that once you cross can never go back. My analogy makes it seem a lot fuzzier. That first time is still a watershed event, but the full impact is much more progressive in nature, like getting hooked on a drug. That first time puts you at risk and begins the addiction, but can still probably be overcome cold turkey. Each successive time sets the drug's hooks into you that much further until soon it is all but impossible to kick (short of lots of rehab).

My main point way back in that post was that, JUST LIKE the first time mongerer, this girl may have made that critical first step into the world of P4P, but that doesn't mean she has progressed so far into it that there's still no stepping back...YET.

To her credit she wasn't altogether happy with that first taste. Some chicas take to it like a fish to water. She knew she had to quit even before she met Capo and MIGHT have made it if some A-Hole hadn't come along offering $400 to tempt her back into it That was like offering a fix to a recovering addict.

Don’t sh1t were you eat.


P.S Forget this advice if you are tossing salad .

1st of BBAD that is some funny shit no pun intended…..

Second, even though I started this thread, I didn’t want to hijack it to my own personal problem. I thought maybe I could have gotten some ideas about how others may have handled, it. With that said, there really is no way to handle it, as we are ourselves crossing that line, of breaking our steadfast rules of believing the fantasy.

How many times I’ve preached that rule, spoke on it written on it about it that it is all a fantasy, don’t believe it. And here I am a legend in my own mind, a monger of the world falling for a P4P gal..

To the rest, you started me thinking that maybe I was way to harsh and that I was out of line as to what I did. Then the more I think about it, I’m sorry I think it was a fair as I could be and let me explain why.

After my Fiancée expierience previously written about, then a failed marriage, countless failed relationships, I gave up seriously thinking bout ever getting married or even settling down again. My current gringa GF is company, as the minute she breaks my chops she is out of here, but lets face it, nobody likes to be alone all the time so we fill our needs. I travel to Latina America often and CR for many a short trip. I have had “novias” down there, ex working girls, working girls, NON working girls, all types as I prefer some real intimacy to the pump of the hour at the MP’s or the Rey. Don’t get me wrong I have and will continue to partake in the MP / REY scenario as it can be fun, but I like to find a little GFE action. With that said, this girl rocked my world and wasn’t prepared for it.

After reviewing everything I’ve written and listened to everyone here, and examined my own feelings, I’ve concluded yes the test was a bit harsh, but I WANTED HER TO PASS NOT FAIL! I wanted more regardless of breaking the fantasy rule, and everything that goes with it and thought maybe it was the pretty women syndrome. I just didn’t feel this gal belonged working P4P, and not that I was Richard Gere and was going to change her or shower her with expensive belongings, I thought there was a chance her feelings were genuine and who knew what would happen. I just knew I could not get passed square one in my own mind, and look for more unless, I believed she wouldn’t revert to her old form.

Could I have handled it differently probably, and perhaps if we look past the idea of her working which of course we can’t I could get some ideas of how you guys would have handled it so that it may be to late for me, but maybe others insight will help others in the future.

Thanks to all!

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The Boss of All Bosses!!! Hey I'm a drunk alcoholics go to meetings!

Shrimp it is! About a year ago my buddy and I took a couple of ticas (not pro'z) out for an evening meal. We decided to order a pair of combo platters with a variety of traditional local favorites... The girls wolfed down all of the shrimp before we could finished our first Pislen. However, in defense of our Ticas, we ordered the food and they helped themselves. We have learned that the vast majority of CR's seafood is exported, which jacks up the price for all of us.

Coxslinger

I took my favorita out to buy her some new running shoes in Colombia(someone stole hers)...she'd been wearing her prima's for a month that were 2 sizes too small (it looked like those shoes would explode any second)....anyway, found her a top-of-the-line pair of Addias for $100.....she said NO WAY too much!! and settled on a $65 pr of Sketchers that she picked out herself!!....that's a keeper in my book!!!!!...........GoT/the rabbit

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u reap what u sow

sucky no condom gets my vote

Prolijo...taking everything in context we are not far apart in our thinking. I agree with your take that the hook is set little by little...both for the monger and the worker. I just still find it humorous that we look for that fresh, semi pro...so we can spoil her, use her, and help turn her into the hardcores we dont want anymore. It's a bit hypocritical to be criticizing the hardcores while taking advantage of the "newbie" girls that have crossed the line. I totally understand it, but we must take responsibility for our part in this game we are playing...

In my 3 years here, i can point out a few girls I spotted the first week they hit the Delrey. None of them looks BETTER for the wear...and I also dont see them as HAPPIER than the day they discovered and accepted the job. Richer maybe...but not happier. I also find that most of us here applaud a girl that trys or succeeds in getting OUT of the biz. Lifes little perplexities...

Just my observation.