|
Some of what he writes does sometimes sound semi-sympathetic to our viewpoint (as in calling the laws unfair and one-sided), but at other times he seems to write what the straight masses want to hear and thus is "politically correct". That's why I think he might actually be a "closet monger" playing it straight for his wider reading audience. Is he a feminist pawn, is he really a hypocrite or is he a really an objective journalist? Its hard to say.
Whether this article is sympathetic or condescending really depends on how you read it. He certainly wasn't overly sympathetic to the gold-digging biotches, although he pointed out that other ticos don't see anything wrong with what they do and even "admire and encourage it". OTOH, while he portrayed the old Gringos who fall prey to this as unfortunate victims, he also described them as "Fool Gringos" and didn't exactly paint them in a very favorable light either. As the quote that Estabanh provided shows, he sees them as mostly a bunch of old ugly out of shape guys, with more money than sense. He goes on to describe them as either sex addicts seeking to escape depression or unhappiness, hedonistic pleasure seekers, possibly addicted to toxic unhealthy relationships or sufferers of midlife crisis struggling with low self-esteem due to their age, failed marriages and work problems. That seems pretty grim and condescending to me too.
It also seems like a broad stereotype to me. Guys of that nature may be the ones most likely and most often to fall for one of these scams. OTOH, in some ways, old ugly out of shape guys may actually be the least likely to fall because it is so much harder for them to delude themselves that it is anything much more than money. However, just because you still hit the gym 3 times a week and haven't TOTALLY let yourself go doesn't mean that you as a 50+ year old guy isn't primarily attractive to a sexy young 20 something year old because of your wealth. And just because you don't suffer from low self-esteem from failed marriages or some other psychological defect, doesn't mean that guys like you haven't slipped up and let themselves be fooled by these master manipulators.
Estebanh is right that the vast majority of CRT stories are good stories with good endings (at least the ones that most people tell). I think it is also fair to say that most of us realize the pitfalls and are on guard against them. OTOH, CRT doesn't represent the vast majority of gringo mongers in CR and I'm sure there have been plenty of them who don't exactly fit Baker's stereotype who have fallen victim to this sort of thing.
Even amongst CRTers and even veteran ones at that, there are guys who have made what later prove to be foolish mistakes. You may think you're immune because you have a well-grounded perspective, but it could really happen to nearly anyone if they let down their guard, as most of us eventually do at some point. I'd bet many of the CRTers who have been fooled would have told you before that it would never happen to them.
Baker concluded his article with some good advice: "Sensible rules to avoid becoming a prey to Gringo Hunters include not marrying impulsively, not having Ch*ldren and not financing more than the normal expenses during their dates." Zebra's advice went even further and I think was even better:
1) Rent, don't own (ie don't marry AT ALL, impulsively or otherwise)
2) Do not let a chica live with you (even if you have a vasectomy to protect against the pregnancy trap, you need to avoid this in order to protect against the domestic abuse and property ones). This may seem extreme for you novia/M-Men guys, but at least be very careful how you proceed in this area.
3) Get a vasectomy. Again this may seem extreme if you still hope to have more K*ds some day with either a gringa or latina, but for the 50+ year olds might make a lot of sense.
4) Have a mentality of "I can take them or leave them." I think a lot of guys let chicas walk all over them, whether its through RFM's or jealous control of their seeing other chicas, because they're afraid of losing them and think that's what they need to do to keep them. Maybe it is, but if so, do they really need to keep such chicas?
Zebra did leave out Baker's last piece of advice which I think should be thrown back in. Namely, not financing more than the normal expenses during their dates (if it winds up costing you as much as cien por hora de sexo, you're paying way too much whether its just for an hour or a live-in situation).
=====
BTW, HunterS, as bad as some laws are in the US, surprisingly they are in many ways much worse in CR. I suggest you read some of those articles.
Last edited by Prolijo on Mon Aug 03, 2009 2:48 pm, edited 2 times in total.
|
Login
Register
FAQ
Search
Calendar
And how many guys have gringa wives that are so understanding about mongering, particularly when it involves screwing over a fellow wife of nearly 10 years AND her 3 Ch*ldren.
