www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Hey,

Guys like I said this is my first post so I hope to not irritate anyone but I do have a lot of questions. My father just passed away and I have decided to move to Costa Rica. Im not into the whole sex world of the Del rey and stuff. Im looking to move there and learn about the culture and meet new people. I have my own income so I really don't have to worry about that part.

Can you find a real girl in Costa that isn't about just the money? My plan is to go and just have fun if I don't like It I can move onto somewhere else. I would like to meet someone I can travel with and just enjoy my life with. I dated a Latin here in the states and loved every minute of it and their families beliefs and really the whole package.

Are all the girls looking to be paid a salary to be with a guy in Costa I ask because that's kinda what im gathering. Im the type of guy that will pay for stuff but im just not looking at paying somebody to be with me 24/7. I find that to be strange and I don't think that would sit well with me.

Im going to enroll into a Spanish school so that I can brush up on my Spanish and learn even more. Plus im going to go back to massage school and finish that up. I have traveled to different places but this will be my first out of country move.

First, condolences on the loss of your father.

Second, if all you read is a whore forum, it may seem like all the women are hookers. Not so. There are many good women who would never even think about hooking. But you won't meet them in the gringo gulch (downtown San Jose area). You need to go to places like Heredia, Alajuela, San Pedro, etc.

And I don't agree that you will need to pay her expenses (rent, utilities, "to look good for you"). That's called a hooker. You need to look for a woman without K*ds who has the freedom to travel and explore. That may be more difficult if she's got a real job and responsibilities.

You should definitely hit the language hard before you move there. Otherwise, forget about meeeting a nice local girl. You'll end up meeting a hooker in disguise who speaks English because she's had a lot of "good times" with tourists.

Very good post Orange, and I second the condolences on the loss of the OP's father.

Nice girls are nice girls the world over, and I have no doubt you can meet one if you try, and she is somewhat close to your age - I don't want to give you an exact example, but if you are 60 I don't think you should seek a partner between 18 - 22 - at least for a serious relationship It would be helpful if you posted your age.

Have you really thought through this move - you had a tragedy in your life; do you really want to upend your life and move to a foreign place unfamiliar to you where you don't speak the language.

Normally I tell people with questions to read the board - a lot - I might direct you to the section on relationships and look to what you need to avoid - but this is a board with a different purpose that what you are seeking. Also, be very wairy of internet dating sites - not uncommon for hookers to post there - not suggesting every profile is a prostitute, but be careful and very cautious with any possible relationship.

That said, nothing wrong with giving it a shot - look for a short term rental (for gods sake don't purchase property) - stay away from the gulch if you are looking to meet a nice girl (although there are many nice working girls, I would not consider them marriage or serious relationship material ) - travel around the country - enroll in a language school or engage a private tudor and really focus on the language and the culture.

Good luck!

My condolensces on you loss! It's understandable that you would want something serious and maybe someone to console you during this bad time.

However, first thing.. Have you sold all your possessions yet and are you ready to uproot completely? If not, I would say to hold off and go to CR (or anywhere) for a nice long 3 month vacation and then go back and evaluate things. If you have sold everything tying you down, my advice is to explore the world.. Do 3 months in every country you can imagine and then decide where you really want to settle into.

Also, keep in mind that every country has their own immigration laws. As US citizens, we have many privilages such as tourist entry into most countries without a visa. But that doesn't mean that we can't simply decide to move to a country one day without going through the proper channels. Costa Rica, for example, has a 90 day limit for tourists. Unless you apply for legal residency, you will need to exit Costa Rica (by land or air) every 90 days for at least 72 hours. Upon your return, you will get a new immigration entry stamp good for up to 90 days (no guarantee you will get 90). This is the way most of the ex-pats who live in CR do it.

I and most of my friends have traveled extensively for decades, to most of the countries in the world. It's our hobby. Some people collect expensive stamps and coins and live in big houses -- we all live in small apartments and spend our disposable income mostly on travel. I say this to establish my point of view.

Having traveled for decades, my friends and I, along with many others that we have met in our travels, agree upon one thing unanimously -- the jury is definitely out on whether women all over the world are basically the same or differ from culture to culture. If I had to vote right now, I would say that women are not the same the world over. That is an opinion, but it's based on dozens of guys from different backgrounds and their experiences. Compare the following to how you think women are the same all over...

1. Russian girlfriend busts out laughing when I start talking about the Bill Clinton scandal with Monica Lewinski. She honestly doesn't understand what the big deal is. Their elected officials have mistresses all the time -- usually several. She told me that if her boyfriend/husband did not want to screw other girls then he must be gay. She calls over 3 of her friends, and they have the same reaction -- laughter -- and "it's a wonder you Americans have Ch*ldren at all -- you're such prudes".

2. Watching a chick flick (USA made) with a Japanese girlfriend. The couple is fighting and the woman starts yelling at the man. My girl gasps quite loudly and says the Japanese equivalent of "oh my god." I say, "what?" She says "if I talked to my husband like that he would beat me badly, then call my father, who would also beat me. I can't believe that a girl would be so disrespectful to talk back to her man. Does that really happen in the USA?"

Well, I could go on. I have been in countries where women regard women who have real jobs (doctor, lawyer, etc.) as lesbians or rebellious misfits. A "REAL" woman stays home and takes care of her house and her man. She must not be able to get a man.

That said, Costa Rican women in general are hot-tempered and not afraid to talk back. Most of the families that I have encountered in CR are matriarchal, but the man is still expected to provide the money and goods for the family. A man with a girlfriend/wife in CR will quite often inherit an extended family that he is also expected to provide for, although this is not as severe as some Pacific Island cultures.

You can meet a real, regular girl in CR. In fact, it is a hell of lot easier than in the USA and the girls are open to a wider age gap. In my experience, up to a 15 year age gap is no problem -- after that it gets sketchy, and it's easier for a 45 year old man to hook up with a 30 year old woman than it is for 33 year old man to hook up with an 18 year old woman. In general, even with a regular, normal girl in CR, you will be expected to provide more in the way of financial support than in the USA, but there are always exceptions. This is just a basic statement on the culture in general.

What an excellent post, stlribs

Because we don't do politics on CRT, all I'll say regarding Clinton/Lewinsky:

We are a great people, but we become puritan when sex is mentioned - so I believe your Russian friends
All the drama was not warranted IMO
To be serious for moment he should have been admonished in the well of the senate
He should have been prosecuted for ruining a good cigar
" " having really bad taste in women

I read quite a bit and started reading Monica Lewinsky's autobiography a couple of years back - I will normally finish a book, any book - almost never stop - but after about 120 pages, I said enough - I can't stand this stupid bitch - just recently in fact, Howard Stern played a voice message Monica left Bill Clinton, when they were having a relationship - I would not care what her oral skills were, or if he found her the most beautiful girl in the world - THIS WAS ONE ANNOYING CUNT - PERIOD

Some very good advice in your post for the OP.

While I hate this expression, if your "heart is pure" you will find someone; just stay away from the gulch, pro's and semi pro's, and TAKE IT SLOW AND EASY USING COMMON SENSE. Overall, what makes sense - cultural norms not withstanding - in one place makes sense in another - unless you are a sucker, she does not expect you pay for her apartment (although a whore might) - besides, most Costa Ricans, although not all, live home until they are married.

(I know we are waaaaay early for this, but frankly, were I in the OP's situation, before I got really serious I'd have the lady checked out by a private investigator for Ch*ldren, criminal record, education, family, etc)

Yes, that was not intended to be a political statement at all. It was just a famous person who made front pages all over the world for messing around while away from his wife



I should have thought of that one

My conundrum is that I guess men are men all over the world and women are women -- deep inside at the basic instinct level, but we have had such vastly different cultural behaviors pounded into us that at the interaction level we will always be very different from different cultures. Just rambling a little here... a little bored. In various parts of the world I have seen...

1. Ch*ldren are encouraged by their parents to become sexually active (at least aware) by age 8 years
2. Smiling (even on the street just passing) at a woman means that you are ready to go home with her. Expect her to immediately come up and start flirting very aggressively, unless she is married, in which case she will look at you like you are a Ch*ld molester just for smiling at her
3. A woman sitting at ANY bar (even a nice one in a nice restaurant) by herself is 100% guaranteed to be working
4. Mothers pimp out their daughters or at least aggressively pursue a husband for her -- a mother who doesn't is considered a BAD mother
5. It is socially unacceptable for a pregnant woman to be outside of her home from the moment she is "showing" until after birth. It is considered a sign of disregard for the baby's safety (she may still make the five-step walk from the front of the building to the car to go visit her parents and other family-type stuff).
6. Cleaning your plate is an insult to the host (unless there are serving bowls on the table that still have food in them). It means that the host did not provide enough for you
7. NOT cleaning your plate is an insult to the host. It means you think the food was no good.
8. Be careful in eastern European countries when served "empty plate" style. A few bowls will come out, and you'll be tempted to fill your plate. Within 10 or 15 minutes there will be probably 20 or more bowls on the table. If you fill up on the first five, you're screwed. It's an insult to not try everything. The tablespoon is your friend. Take ONE tablespoon of each dish until the host sits and starts eating (that means all the food is on the table).
9. Never comment on anything in the house in a positive way (not negative either, just keep your mouth shut), unless asked by the host what you think of it. If you say something like "wow, that's a nice vase", it might be given to you when you leave, even if it's a priceless family heirloom
10. If you specifically permit or allow a girl to stay in your home past sunrise, fully expect her parents and all of her brothers and sisters to expect full support and most likely living in your home indefinitely. Fortunately, passing out drunk with her and waking up after dawn doesn't count.
11. Even asking for a small drink or beer in some place is considered crass and vulgar. Refusing a drink in other places is considered extremely rude. Be aware that "drink" means different things in different places. If a girl asks you if you drink, she might be asking if you're a drunk. You say "no", and the next thing you know, you're at a restaurant with a shot of vodka in front of you, and you're confused. The girl will look at you like you're some kind of weirdo. She'll chug the shot of vodka in front of you and say, "I don't drink either." It's not a joke or sarcasm -- "Drinking" means you're a lush. Everybody does a shot of vodka before a meal. If you go to a REAL Russian restaurant (not the tourist ones), the shot of Vodka is included with the meal, just like the breadsticks at Olive Garden. Refusing the one shot of vodka right before a meal in Russia is considered the same as "flipping off" the host.
12. You NEVER use the excuse of working late to cheat on your wife with your mistress. Working late is a sign of great respect for your company and is often used in Asian culture. You might be legally signed up for an 8-hour day, but if the day's work is not done, you stay until it is. Working late is a sign of great honor and your wife/girlfriend will be even more likely to jump on you like a rabid tiger when you get home at 1am. When I first visited Japan and came home late with a colleague after work, I made the mistake of vouching for him. His wife took umbrage and said "if my husband says he is working late, then he is." If you lie about that, it is a great shame on your family and the company that you work for. On the other hand, being invited to the home of your boss for dinner is a guarantee that you are getting a raise, promotion, etc. To invite you into his home and not give you something grand is like your boss just said to the whole world "I am a huge dirtbag with no respect for anyone, and you are free to tell anyone you like about it." You must bring your wife and all your K*ds, if you are married and have K*ds, but they must leave the room after dinner, when the liquor comes out and business is discussed. A good Asian wife will choreograph this perfectly, sweeping the K*ds with her into another room in synchronization with the wife of the boss.
13. Top of the cake... I was in a "certain country" where I thought the father (my coworker) was trying to hook me up with his 18 year old smoking hot daughter. Turns out that he had an older daughter that I had never met. Once we all figured this out, the 18 girl was like "please take my sister and you can have me too". The dad was saying "that would be great if it's OK with you." At some later point I thought I was in a Whitesnake video or something, but sure enough, the older daughter, about 28, also pretty good looking, comes in, and, long story short, she's happy to meet me and ready to trundle off to my apartment. Mom and Dad are bubbly happy, saying "and our younger daughter that you like too!" Shacked up with both girls for about 2 months and they were perfectly happy about it, and so were the parents. Went out with the two girls and the parents several times to VERY nice restaurants (black-tie stuff), and Dad was constantly bragging to the waiters, other patrons, everybody, that his two girls were living with a nice man with a stable income and a good provider. Mom was constantly bragging on the phone to her girlfriend and anyone else who would listen that her girls were living with a man who took care of his women. This is the same culture where I once asked an 18 year old girl why she didn't date guys her own age instead of me (35 years old at the time). Her reply was simply "I DO NOT date Ch*ldren". I heard that same expression many times after that. Both girls enlightened me to how different women can be. They positively were prejudiced against good-looking younger guys and guys who talked smooth. They ESPECIALLY HATED guys that were not from their country that learned and spoke in their language. "Those guys are just trying to play us." Young, good-looking guys who speak our language are loser con-artists." Cynical, yes. Compare that to what else you have seen. A real eye-opener for me. In that place, I learned that the only way to attract women in certain places is not to approach them and act completely uninterested, and above all, do NOT speak their language. It's like crack to them.

I have found in CR, that despite the fact that women constantly seem to be prying as much money as they can out of you, they are a very giving people. What they perceive as "arrogant gringos" are pressed for cash all the time, but anyone they consider a genuine person -- seriously, I have had to metaphorically beat them off with a stick when they try to help me with everything. My bud warned me about this before I moved down here. We both have gotten some excellent assistance with all kinds of things, including appliances and furniture for our apartments at bargain-basement prices.

One thing that I regularly do as my good friend suggested, is regularly visit certain second-hand stores. There you will find all of the brand-new (still in the box with the stickers on them) items given to the girls by hapless tourists. As soon as the guys leave, the girls immediately pawn or sell the stuff for cash, and the stores resell them for a very decent price. Think about it... if you visit CR regularly, how many times have you heard a girl say that her purse, phone, tablet, notebook computer, etc. was "stolen" or "broken". I may very likely have the brand-new Sony tablet (brand new, in the box, plastic still on it, works great) bought by someone reading this very message right now for 30% less than you can buy it anywhere in the USA.

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Glad to help. One of my life's missions is to help people realize that cultures are vastly different, and that people are not the same world-wide. Here's another trick I learned from a bud in "one certain country." --

Went into a fairly busy bar, with a large map unfolded as far as I could. Girl to Guy was about a 10:1 ratio. "I am lost, does anyone here speak English?" About 15 heads turn towards me, several severely hot girls completely ignoring the 20 year old well-built guys sitting right next to them. One comes over to me, leaving the guy talking to her in mid-sentence (he was from USA, speaking the native language). "I talk bit little am English", she says. "OK, I am looking for my hotel, but I can't find it. If you can tell me where it is, I would like to have a couple of drinks with you to thank you for your help."

Dude was pissed, but I just said "hey, she came to me". When he got more irritated, the girl called security over and they carted his ass out of the bar. She was laughing "dumbass merican can talk language thinks smart is stupid stay home." I would never intentionally horn in on a dude anywhere in the world, but the point is clear -- the girls in some places want something real, not smooth talk. Of course, a different place would have a different attitude and call for a different tactic. Let go of your preconceptions -- when you go to a new country, go with a blank slate, be prepared for anything. Those who say "this is the way people are, anywhere in world" are completely ignorant of how cultures are different. It's the same as saying "cows eat grass, why can't cats eat grass?"

How do the guys get away with an immediate turn around, cross, get stamped into Nica, go back to the CR border and get stamped back in?

Common misconception. The 72-hour requirement is a Costa Rican CUSTOMS requirement for your tax exemption bringing goods into CR. You will notice that the 72-hour question is on the CUSTOMS form but not on the IMMIGRATION form. It is absolutely legal to leave CR and then return as fast as you can. I have actually checked the "NO" box on the 72-hour question at the airport, and Customs will look in the back of your passport (that's where Customs puts their stamp, if you need one) if you are declaring anything, to make sure that you are not exceeding your allowance.

Thanks to everyone that posted I got a lot out of what you are saying and I enjoyed reading the responses. I am 33 as of next month. My father's death was and is one of the most horrible things that I have ever had to go through. It wasn't his fault and when this starts to go to court I don't want to be anywhere around. He was a very important person here in Palm Beach FL and it's going to be all over the news. With that being said yes I have my own money I have a trustfund and don't ever have to work unless I want to. My grandfather was a very smart man and he invented a number of things that we use very heavily in todays world. Im not going to get into the details as it really doesn't matter but the history in my family goes very very far back in time. We started a lot of various different things and mainly in New England here in the states. So I haven't had to do anything my whole life.

However I have lived the life of many people and plan on writing a book while im in Costa Rica about it. I already have publishers lined up who want to sell my story. Here in Palm Beach I have spent lots on girls Im 5 10 about 195 lbs solid muscle and from what I have been told by many very attractive. I have never had problems picking up girls due to who I am I have had the pleasure of meeting the finer women and enjoying the finer things that other friends of mine wish they could. Two of my ex girlfriends went onto the Bachelor show but I have never been with anyone based on looks that's not my style. I look at who the person is Im also a Scorpio so my desires run very deep in my blood. Im far from a spoiled trust fund baby I have a heart of gold and I help out everyone I know when I can.

After traveling around a little I have noticed how different relationships can be in other places. Here in Palm Beach everything is materialistic. It is very common for a hot girl to walk up to you in a club or bar and ask you where you live, what you do for work, what kind of car you drive etc. If all of that adds up then she will ask for your name sad but true. Women here want that guy with money and if they have a great job expect that once the ring is on the finger she is going to quit that job and be full time house wife. Funny thing is she knows nothing about being a house wife or how to cook or clean or really do anything other then shop and lay out by the beach or go out with friends. The girls here are not worth it trust me come to visit and then leave this is not a real life here.

I met a Latin here and totally fell in love with everything about her the culture, family bonds, her K*D you name it. Perfect girl for me and yes I screwed that up I wasn't ready for it I was still in the Palm Beach phase of buying what I wanted for instance...instead of just taking off for a weekend with my partner which is much needed I was more concerned with adding twin turbos to the corvette. It wasn't until after she was gone that I changed. I learned that I was much happier with her and learned that my materialistic side wasn't bringing me any kind of happiness like I thought it was. I am at that point now to where I want a family of my own I know scary place to be for most lol. I know that I have something REAL to offer no doubt in my mind that the girls won't see that on their own and im not just talking about money. Im not like my American friends and I hear this from so many people and in so many other countries. I don't maybe it's just that in my life I have been through so much that it has made me into a very genuine person today. One plus to living here is that I can spot a girl who is only about money a mile away sure the girls in Costa are good im sure...But let me tell you the girls here wow some can really play the role very very very well.

So my question is to those of you that have paid for your live in girlfriends. I am just curious as to what kind of bill they will run up in the course of a month's time. After reading and doing research one things for sure these girls in other countries probably do right with the money they are given which makes me respect them more. I have no doubt in my mind that they help their families out which I think is awesome. I'd like to see a girl here act like that lol shit she isn't helping anyone but herself that is a guarantee to be sure. Im def not going to move where other gringos are like the beaches Im totally looking to experience the heart of Costa such as Heredia where I plan to go to school to learn Spanish. Im very interested in the culture and I do plan on keeping up with my own beliefs as well. But I am very open to learning their way of life as well. Thanks once again for the responses.

" what kind of bill they will run up in the course of a month's time", AS MUCH AS THEY CAN.

You've been lucky in life but sounds like you are needy for a relationship. The needy part combined with having your kind of $$$ is the danger area as you have figured. Kojo is right for a majority of ticas. So why do you have to tell her your wealthy? And why would you let her have access to parts of your assets so that she could run up a bill?

Test the waters, learn spanish, the culture, meaning the games, the "Tico family" scenarios, especially her family because more often then not, they're going to be in your life maybe alot more then you want. My advice is if you take that plunge, don't live close to the rest of her clan for alot of reasons, the main one you will not have much privacy.

I'd be very cautious before you, a wealthy guy, starts playing house--which has its legal dangers in CR. You can afford a good family law lawyer in CR. Make sure you get counsel about how to do that and what not to do. (Don't tell them your wealthy or you'll get a wealthy bill).

The other problem with shackin up in CR is it's hard to find one you like that doesn't have at least one K*D, unless you like raising somebody else's K*ds. And dealing with the father who 9 times out of ten is going to be a pain in your ass and starting needless shit. Many Ticas and Ticos have a wierd mentality about their ex's, divorced or never married, when they have K*ds together. Many Ticas carry the "he's the father of my K*ds" to the max even though he's a terd. I'll leave it at that but you should be able to figure it out.

I never let my babe stay more then a Fri to Monday am, no clothes left in the dressers, no K*ds around unless it's absolutely necessary. I pay her mom to watch em. Pisses her off but her mom is cool with the $$. But I'll see her during the week, go out to eat/party, buy her groceries, clothes, whatever she needs, pay her water/electric/cell, plus some walking around $$. She has a decent govt job so she's doing OK for rent. I like her alot, very attractive, intelligent Tica with a great personality, bubbly, fun. Understands english which helps alot because I can't always express myself properly in spanish and some combination of words don't mean the same in both lingo's or are in fact very different. So we teach each other.

In short, I treat her very well, very generous, but I always say no when she is asking for dough for her mother or siblings for some kind of problem, emergency, etc. Half the time it's baloney from her sibs or mom so that's a caution area.

You seem to want a full time wifey thing which is cool, normal, I don't. There are a few guys on this board that have hooked up with Ticas, married or live ins, succesfully and are happy. I hope they chime in and if so shee if you can hook up with them for advice.