www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Bubba and Ray (Tennessee Mechanical
Engineers) were standing at the base of a flagpole,
looking up.

A woman walked by and asked what they were
doing. We're supposed to find the height of the
flagpole," said Bubba, "but we don't have a ladder."

The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few
bolts, and laid the pole down. Then she took a tape
measure from her pocket, took a measurement, announced,
"Eighteen feet, six inches," and walked away.


Ray laughed and said "Ain't that just like a blond!
We ask for the height and she gives us the length."

_________________
Pura Vida
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four
essential food groups:
alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.
Alex Levine

Good one.

Bubba and Ray were bungee-jumping one day. Bubba says to Ray, you know, we
could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico."
Ray thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money and buy
everything they'll need; a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc.

They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the
square. As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble.
Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work. When they had
finished, there was such a crowd they thought it would be a good idea to
give a demonstration.

So, Bubba jumps. He bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up,
Ray notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. Unfortunately, Ray
isn't able to catch him and he falls again, bounces and comes back up again.
This time, he is bruised and bleeding.

Again, Ray misses him. Bubba falls again and bounces back up. This time he
comes back pretty messed up - he's got a couple of broken bones and is
almost unconscious. Luckily, Ray finally catches him this time and says,
"What happened? Was the cord too long?"

Barely able to speak, Bubba gasps, "No, the bungee cord was fine...It was the
crowd. What the hell is a piñata?"

Subject: Hillbilly Medical Terms


For all you medical types.

Benign..........................What you be after you be eight.

Bacteria........................Back door to cafeteria.

Barium.........................What you do with dead folks.

Cesarean Section...........A neighborhood in Rome.

Catscan........................Searching for the cat.

Cauterize......................Made eye contact with her.

Colic............................A sheep dog.

Coma............................A punctuation mark.

D&C............................Where Washington is.

Dilate...........................To live longer than your K*ds do.

Hangnail......................What you hang your coat on.

Hospital.......................The biggest building in town, other than Joe's feed warehouse or Franks lumber mill.

Impotent......................Distinguished, well known.

Labor Pain...................Getting hurt at work.

Medical Staff................A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake.

Morbid........................A higher offer than I bid.

Nitrates.......................Cheaper than day rates.

Node...........................I knew it.

Outpatient...................A person who has fainted.

Pap Smear....................A fatherhood test.

Pelvis...........................Second cousin to Elvis.

Post Operative.............A letter carrier.


Terminal Illness...........Getting sick at the train station.

Tumor........................More than one.

Urine...........................Opposite of mine.

Varicose......................Near by

liked the joke; the rest is just OK.

_________________
"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED