www.CostaRicaTicas.com

I'm determined on my upcoming trip to communicate with the chicas in their native tongue as much as possible, and I'm wondering whether the familiar form of "you" - tu - and associated conjugations, or the more formal - usted - is more appropriate. Should you always start out with "usted", and then gradually shift to "tu" when you get the know the girl better? Any help is much appreciated.

Rhythm,

Using the formal tense of words at first and transitioning to informal as you get to know them should do you fine.

I personally just stay in the formal tensing of words the whole time, simply because there is always that slight chance of offending one in the informal tense, whereas there is a zero chance of doing that in the formal tense.

Ruffnutz

_________________
EVERYONE'S A ROCK STAR IN C.R.!!
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Ruffnutz,

Thanks for the quick reply! Would it make even more sense just to take your cue from the girl, and only use the familiar is she uses it?

This question was covered not long ago but the search function does not work well, or go back far enough.

Ruffnutz, that's what I was taught too and would be correct in most social situations I guess, but:
I don't recall a DR chica ever referring to me in the formal so why respond that way? The putas don't care,
however if your chatting it up with a regular chica then it would be polite for sure...

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Rhythm,

As Paco pointed out, this social scene doesn't dictate any formalness from your end, and the chicas definitely won't turn you away based on how you refer to them. You probably won't be doing any harm starting off in the infomal tense with the chicas, as they will more than likely be informal with you from the get-go.



There is no wrong answer here. IMHO, Paco, it ultimately comes down to being a gentleman, regardless of whether you're speaking to a puta or a nun. And I know that all of us here always push towards being just that to the chicas, regardless of what their profession is. Although this is not every time, I truly believe that you will get a better bang for your buck by portraying gentlemanly behavior. For the LAL guys, the treatment before the fun may not matter, but I admittedly play the game a little different and treat them with the utmost respect, up until the moment they enter the bedroom, and then Ruffnutz turns into "Fork-tongue Ruff", red horns and all. I also tend to lean more towards the GFE experience, so the treatment of the chicas on my end, once again, is admittedly more respectable towards them.

Ahem, 'til the bedroom, of course.

Ruffnutz

_________________
EVERYONE'S A ROCK STAR IN C.R.!!
"Just when I thought I was out... They pull me back in." -- Ruffnutz on trying to quit CRT

Costa Rica is even more complicated than usual, since they almost never use the, "tu," form with each other. There is a, "vos," form that happens with family and some others, but not likely with us. Sometimes the , "tu," form will be used between men and women, and often I've heard it with working girls. I talked about the issue with my former regular, and she said to use, "tu," but she forgot the next time we were together. They will also use, "ti," with people they refer to as, "usted," so if anybody can explain that one I'd like to hear it.

Ti is ME

And Ruff, don't worry about it dude, I mean come on this isn't your language the broads know this, they truly don't expect you to speak it, speak it a little or speak it at all. You can talk English to these broads and they wouldn't give a rats. I mean all they care for is your money, nothing more, not your C*ck, not your personality, not your life, and if they got you believeing that they do care, well they got you fooled and they are doing their job. They only care for the green in your pocket, or reds, or toucans, or blues. I mean dang I speak Spanish and I never worry about "Tu" or "usted" i just talk. The broads don't care!!

Superman said

Yeah, they want their dinero, but let's not get too cynical about it. There were plenty of times on my last trip when I felt that if I could have just communicated a little better, it would really have enhanced the experience. In at least a couple of cases, they were genuinely nice girls that I would like to have gotten to know better (though don't put me down for a GFE guy quite yet...)

yeah i dunno man i guess each girl is different, i guess there might be a couple in there that might not be ALL for the money, but it is on their mind that is for sure. That money in your pocket pays the bills for the whole family, so that is her pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. ha, did that make any sense?
Lou

Superman- NO, ti is NOT me.

Ti is the informal form of saying you in certain situations. i.e.,

Esto es para ti = This is for you (informal)
Esto es para usted = This is for you (formal).

Enough of that. Superman, I'm an exception to your statement, as I grew up in Puerto Rico and yes, it IS my language (second language). I think Rhythm has a point in that I think you're being a little too cynical about the whole game. Personally, I think you DO have a better experience with the chicas if you can communicate clearly with them. I think that goes for ANY situations. To keep it simple, however, then I would argue that instead of being limited to "no cien" or "oral sin condon?", I can have much better dialogue than that in the negotiating phase, and I guarantee you that speaking the language well goes a long long way in the overall experience.

Ruffnutz

_________________
EVERYONE'S A ROCK STAR IN C.R.!!
"Just when I thought I was out... They pull me back in." -- Ruffnutz on trying to quit CRT

Superman,
You're wrong! At least in part. Money is certainly the PRIMARY concern of all BM chicas, BUT that doesn't mean it is their ONLY concern or that you won't meet some chica elsewhere in SJ who places a lower priority on it. Put yourself in their position. Sure, you wouldn't work for free but salaries being mostly equal wouldn't you rather work for a boss who could communicate what he wanted rather than work for one you couldn't understand? Many of us spend lots more time with these girls outside the sack than we do during the act itself. Don't you prefer hanging with chicas when your conversation can extend beyong the basic "what's your name, how old, how many bambinos,um...ah..where you from, em... er...". You get the idea. With limited common language conversations will lapse after a very short time. These girls ARE there to make money, but that doesn't mean they want to bored out of their minds. Finally, for those of you that do speak a little spanish, think how tiring and tedious it is for most you to carry on a language in spanish for any length of time (for those that don't speak any spanish, think how frustrating and difficult to understand a foreign tongue). Now, think about how hard it must be for them (probably much harder as they probably didn't have the advantage of a foreign language class back in high school, hmm). To the extent we can speak their language or limit the burden they have in speaking ours we make their job easier and they have to appreciate that.

As to the original question, I've heard various answers. I've heard that ticos use the formal usted or even the old-style vos and at the least it is probably better to err on the side of formality rather than the other way around. OTOH, I've also always heard BM chicas using the informal tu. Personally, I think it is best to take my cue from the person I'm talking to. In contrast, I've also heard before that the usted form is considered to be too archaic, stilted and formal by most younger tico speakers. Starting with usted and shifting to tu is also certainly an option, but don't shift back and forth or worse use both forms in the same sentence as that will definitely peg you as one who doesn't know what they are doing.

Ultimately, Superman is mostly right about one thing. I don't think that this a question that anyone should spend anytime worrying about. The chicas know spanish isn't your native tongue, don't expect you to speak perfectly and will be impressed and pleased that you even try (and hopefully succeed) at speaking their language. As long as you are able to get your ideas across and keep your conversation moving forward, you;ve accomplished all that is necessary.

Ha, yeah everyone has their opinion, and I see you have yours. And I wasn't talking about the girls in SJ, the regular girls, I'm talking about these chics in the DR and BM. I see the girls got you believing that money isn't the only thing that is on their mind. I am sure their exceptions to every rule, but it is very rare.

I mean take me for example, I have a GF in San Jose, she is amazingly beautiful, wherever we go she sticks out. And to stick out in CR, the woman has to be gorgeous. When we walk into a crowd of people, the crowd parts like as if Jesus himself was walking through, I always let her lead. Well, getting back to the subject, yeah she has no concern in my money, we take turns paying for meals, she buys me gifts, she comes and picks me up in her pick up on her days off, and I ask her what she wants me to bring her back from the states and she never wants anything, just that I return soon! Now that my friend, is a true Tica!
Lou

Superman,
You used your x-ray vision and saw right through my post....and missed my point entirely. I added the comment about regular girls to my main point about BM girls not being SOLELY about money really as just an afterthought. That comment about regular girls was intended really just as a parenthetical comment that there were even girls in SJ that WERE NOT primarily about money. I'm sure we're all impressed with your comments on your novia, but it adds nothing to the debate since we are in apparent agreement concerning "regular non-working girls". BTW, are you sure the reason the crowds part for you two is not to make way for that butt? DAMN, that baby's got back!

Back on my main point, where we clearly have different opinions, I was saying that your view was extreme. I was AGREEING with you that money is universally their primary concern. I disagreed with you that it was their ONLY concern. And I gave examples that all of us can relate to in our own work experiences that can help us understand what might be their motivations. You think you know these girls and that anyone who holds a different view is simply being fooled. I think they are much more complex than that.

Perhaps it IS 90% or more about "Show me the money" (in some cases maybe less). But you're not going to convince that for nearly all chicas (not "rare exceptions") there is not that other more or less 10% that plays some part. Take 2 guys both offering the same amount of dinero, don't tell me any BM girl won't have some preference for one or the other. Maybe it isn't language, maybe its looks or the size of your C*ck (and for a girl that gets lots of C*ck sometimes bigger isn't always better), maybe its your smile, maybe its not looking like you're the type that is going to knock them around or try to shove a 15" dildo up their butt, or maybe its just for that brief moment not treating them like a whore and calling them "broad" or "puta". Even BM girls are human too.

okay okay prolijo, geez i get the point man!

I was surprised during my 1st trip to Costa Rica. I met a local girl, beautiful, not a working girl, and not in San Jose. After speaking with her, and her friends they let me know that using the TU form wasn't nice. I had no idea since most places you use TU with friends and those your own age (I'm still in my 20's), then use ud for formal situation, much in the way you would use Sir or Mam in the states. After I got to know her better, and my next trip TU was more common, however ud was still the main form used between us and friends.

I have no idea why this is the case in Costa Rica, but when in Rome........