www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Wes,
Why wait till next year??? Good post!! You need a break bro, come on down.
Regards, 911 Driver

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The happy hour is a device either for getting rid of social obligations hurriedly en masse or for making overtures toward more serious social relationships, as in the etiquette of whoring.- Brooks Atkinson

I couldn’t agree with you more, from now on I will refer to these women as “whores” or “hookers”. Prostitute seems like a strong word to use in describing them and what they do……..

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Unfortunately my job is so demanding that I have to wait...plus financially next year is a better time.

I am one of those guys that has to have a reason for everything.I want my first trip to be exactly a week long...it takes me usually 2 days into a vacation to even relax and enjoy myself(I am tightly wound from work)

There are also other reasons which I can't reveal on a public forum because "loose lips sink ships",and who knows what internet savvy dude is going to happen by that might know me and blow the whistle..since I was stupid enough to sign up under my real name..

Suffice to say by next year it will not matter and I will be free to post as I see fit...I am not a secretive guy...quite the opposite...but the "other reasons" are potentially a big deal.

Wesley, great post.


You need to get control of your elipses, friend. Otherwise, a very thought-provoking and Prolijo-esque post.

I'm not sure that I can agree with your self-loathing. You seem to be taking a lot of blame and making numerous apologies. No, it wasn't yo who turned your ex into a monster. She was the one who baited and switched. You also take too much blame for looming over her and growling; in other words, you are denying your essential male nature. Okay, so you made some mistakes, but ex essentially embezzled your money from you, planning for at least a year to leave with a substantial portion of your cash. That is not just unfair, it is quite literally criminal.

You are right in one observation. So right in fact that I'm thinking of having it put up as a sticky in this section. What makes women reliable or not deends upon their options. North America/Europe offer women many options; as a result, they neither need nor really like us.

I have often viewed the man-woman game as being a "winner take all" proposition. Women are more likely to win. Sometimes it seems that their collective goal is the elimination of men from their lives, or maybe even genocide (gendercide?) followed by some sort of lesbian Amazonian utopia.

Without overanalyzing, I am just glad that for now, we can travel to poorer countries to buy the affection and sex that gringas no longer seem to want (or need) to give us.

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Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

Sorry.I forgot,your computer reads aloud to you,correct?I bet that could get pretty annoying.

I developed that habit on another forum(a woodworkers forum of sorts)as I found it breaks a tedious post into readable sections on the computer screen.Keeps my eyes from crossing,So I assumed it did the same for others.

Wesley, welcome to the board and thanks for the great post.

On this board there is a lot of grousing about the state of women in the U.S.

Many complaints about the appearance of gringas older than 40. More complaints about the attitudes of gringas of all ages in their interactions with men.

Some of these complaints are well-founded, but you are right to bring up the point that men in the U.S. aren't perfect either. And how many men older than 35 are looking better for their ages than the typical gringa?

You are also correct in noting that Latinas aren't necessarily the answer. As many CRTers have reported, taking them out of their natural habitat and bringing them to the U.S. is almost always a problem since these Latinas quickly take on gringa attributes we didn't like in the first place. Also Latinas don't necessarily age better than gringas based on what I've seen in Latin America and in the U.S.

P4p in places like Costa Rica can be a good answer and is the obvious reason that most of us travel and post here, well aside from the CRT trolls. You've also noticed in the threads that paying more for the chicas does not guarantee better service from them.

Controlling the situation with women is obviously important no matter where you are. Regardless of their economic or social situation, most women are attracted to men who are strong-willed.

But in the end, what is the answer for typical CRT guy? No matter how we act or look, there is going to come a point when we can't attract the hot 20s gringa. Many seem to have found the answer by moving to Latin America and living for the p4p action or even the ltr.

As for me, I don't know what the answer is now or will be in the future. I'm around the same age as you and also in good shape. I got tired of the dating scene in the U.S. in my early 30s and started mongering then. It's been fun, but it has also been something of a double edged sword. On the one hand, I got lazy with the women here and didn't even try with them. On the other hand, I've had awesome times with chicas around the world.

Ironically, gringas became more interested in me as I became less interested in them. I now wonder if I didn't pass up some good opportunities here over the past few years. I started to realize this more when the economy tanked last year, and I was unable to get away from work to travel. I was forced into hunting in my own area. Of course I was a bit spoiled from the years of the hottest Latina, Asian, & Euro p4p so gringas my own age were not even a consideration. What has worked really well for me over the past year here has been "Friends With Benefits". Kind of like your situation with your Latina neighbor but with sex. I've got 2 regulars now and could add another soon. All Latinas. All in their 20s.

I guess this is the point of my post. Don't pass up opportunities with local women, especially those like your Latina neighbor. And even if she doesn't add "with benefits" to "friend", you know what to look for.

I'm guessing that you'll figure out Costa Rica pretty quickly. Enjoy.

El C, I never thought about what elipses, smileys and other weird punctuation would sound like on a talking computer. I will try to use more standard English in my posts. But first, what do these things sound like?
...


etc.

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"All them women gonna make me,
teach 'em what they don't know how..." TMIB

Wes
You can change your srceen name
You post was very good
Hate to see hold back due to your handle choice
When me and ex split she said to me you know we were better of when we were poor! She was right we had to work together to get by.
Sure money is great but can have ill effects
Looking forward to your future post
As another member said Costa Rica will be a good fit for your woes

Wesley

Well written and well said. I really enjoy reading your post. it’s ironic how much as we read these post, we begin to see a little of our self in each story. I hope someday I get to meet you and buy you a beer. Live long and strong brother....

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"THE TRUTH IS' EVERYBODY IS GOING TO HURT YOU. YOU JUST GOTTA FIND THE ONE WORTH SUFFERING FOR"
Robert Nesta Marley

I had to ponder on this statement for a while before making a reply.

The answer is yes and no.It is not that I take blame for her changing,it is more that I did not understand the female psyche enough at that time to realize what I was doing by trying to give her what she wanted.

Basically,I think women want us to be "male" enough to provide for and to protect them,but "feminine" enough to respect their feelings.This is difficult.The same testosterone that drives us to fight for her also seems to drive us to fight with her.

The cure obviously is for the woman to find a good strong man who is not wantonly abusive and then for her to be completely passive towards us.Most of us only "fight" when there is aggression to fight against.

But essentially it is a lost cause I believe.We are not made to coexist on a long term basis perhaps.Most men would agree that a perfect life would be to have a constant flow of women around us.They would stay only long enough for us to get bored,then they would move on.

But since Women seem to be wired to hang on for dear life until our usefulness is gone,then I think we have a problem.

So impossible to comprehend it all.It is like pondering the vastness of the universe.But be assured there is much of the story I have left out.No way to put that into a post and I would fill up the forum trying.

I understand this completely.I have often said and thought the last few years that I was never so happy as when I lived in that rundown old house I rented from my uncle.I had room mates come and go,but it was always the party house.

I remember twice a week or more I would come home from work and a party would already have sprung up.Great times they were indeed.

I would eat Ramen noodles and drink soda and coffee to survive.But when you are young nobody has money so it does not matter.



Well I am sure to be down there next year at some point between Jan. and May most likely.(how is that for a vague time frame).I have been looking at the SL site and after reading this forum will most likely be trying to book a room there.

I am glad I joined though.If I had not I would almost surely have booked at HDR and wasted a bunch of money for an inferior room.

Welcome to the board Wes

Take that year between now and your CR trip to learn Spanish. I know were all busy, you won't be sorry...

Cujo

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"Pain is the fuel that fans the flames of my pyre. A battle plan is only as good as the general carrying it out on the field. This is my war son, and I have the biggest bombs and the smallest conscience"...

Yo, Wes. Great post but it comes to me like you are over thinking P4P. First is not the real deal, just a fantasy that we paid for. Secondly, like some of the above posters said, not all gringas are created equal. Sometimes you do have to give them a chance. Welcome to the board and like Nh said, change your handle.

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Hit them fast, Hit them hard and NEXT!
A good chica is like a good carpenter - No wood gets wasted!!!

El C, I'll take that as a compliment and, yes, I agree that Wes laid down in great detail a very thoughtful and frank tale, one that I'm sure many of us can relate too.

I understand what you said about his post appearing to contain "self-loathing" or blame, but I didn't read it that way. What I read was an understanding that he had a complex interdependent relationship and that he also at least CONTRIBUTED in some ways to the course the relationship took. There are always 2 sides to every story. IMHO, if more of us were more empathetic towards our partners' points of view (of course, early enough in the relationship rather than after the divorce) then those relationships probably would be much healthier and last longer.

Of course, I think most of us would agree that, regardless of whatever faults Wes might have had in their relationship, there is nothing about that which can justify the hidden deceitful way she siphoned money off in the way that she did. If she really felt she deserved those funds she could have gone about getting them in a more honest way. Whatever else Wes might have done he didn't lie to her. And if she didn't like his abuse and it was so bad, she could have filed for divorce at any time rather than continue to stick around and spend so much of his earnings.

IMHO, there is a lot of misogynistic gringa-bashing on this board, some of it justified but some not. I think a lot of it is not a matter of good or bad, right or wrong, but rather that men and women are just wired differently (culturally and genetically). The biggest draw that women have in their favor is their sex appeal and beauty and that only lasts a relatively short part of their adult life. If they give us their best years, why wouldn't they expect to cling on for the reward or at least get something out of it because if they wind up divorced and middle-aged, they wind up pretty much stuck. What do they really have to offer at that point for the next guy? OTOH, with guys our ability to support a wife (or "rent" chicas), which is our major draw, only grows as we get older and get more advanced in our careers. I also happen to think that as much as many of us let ourselves go, for whatever reason, men tend to age better than most women.

With all that being said, personally I think that marriage is an increasingly obsolete institution. It makes some sense to somehow contractually commit 2 partners undertaking parenting together as that is a long term proposition. However, aside from that, there seems to be very little to gain for most males from marriage. Back when the institution first started, a couple would marry shortly after they came to childbearing age but they wouldn't live much beyond when those K*ds got married themselves or until what we now consider middle-age. So "until death do us part" really only meant maybe 10-15 years. I don't think its that natural in most cases for 2 people to maintain their mutual attraction and compatibility for any longer than that, if even that long. Just see how Wes and his wife changed and grew apart during the relatively short course of their marriage. And when these marriages fail, the current laws make disolving that marriage so painful that many unhappy couples stay together rather than get divorced. Incentivizing 2 people to stick together and work out their problems is one thing, but more often than not marital problems don't get resolved, they just fester. And when one finally does bite the bullet and get divorced, it is usually the male who gets the shorter end of the stick. Wouldn't it make so much more sense for 2 people who love each other to simply live together "so long as you both shall lOve" and be able to simply walk away (other than when K*ds are involved) when they grew apart as most of them eventually will?

Well said by Brother Prolijo. I was in just such a relationship as he mentioned as an ideal (age 44-57 for me; she was 10 years younger). When the love ended so did the relationship, and we parted amicably (she subsequently found another and got married; me--never).

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"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED

Interesting thread all the way around,

I solved it by moving here four years ago. If you end up in a relationship here (almost all that actually move here do) you will be getting a different set of female related problems. Some of the issues are better and some worse. One overiding difference is at any moment that I am unhappy I can at least temporarily solve my women issues by heading to an MP, SL or wherever. This outlet is not so ez or even available in most places back home.

It takes a while to unlearn our cultural rules with women back home. The best example I can give is asking a Tica where she wants to go to eat. It confuses them that you would ask if you are the one paying. If you say we are going here and she does not like it she will let you know by her reaction. Typically they are unable to make a suggestion.

Also, you should distinguish between being in control and firm with being a pushy jerk.

BKTUNA
I am never going home