www.CostaRicaTicas.com

I've never had any delusions that any of the girls were my girlfriend and we were going to have anything more. I have been disappointed as I have thought of a few as friends and they still won't be straight with you. I've got a grade A bullshit detector and have told girls just to be straight with me and then they are not. Best not to have any expectations I guess.

I think (being a libra I really try to be balanced) that as always there are exceptions, but probability dictates:

1) If you meet a working gal ... she is doing that job for money for some reason or another.
2) Emotionally (except for the very strong minded or hardened) that job is tough ... mentally
3) They ALL have been promised the sun by some gingo
4) They likely have lied, and been lied to themselves

It is funny. We often point out in threads their deciet and lies and that is true, but many have also been the recipient.

Being anything other that LAL is a very tricky and difficult game. Some get scorched (financially, emotionally etc).

I myself ... Maybe someday I'll be found laying next to the Aligator .. a big ball of mentally drained mess. But in the interim...

a) I NEED a connection other that sex down there
b) I like to go to see the guys as much as the gals (happy hr, breakfast etc)
c) Like a good play, I enter stage left ... do my part .. try to touch a life albeit for a moment ... then leave.

I have always liked the phrase .... "Train your mind ... but follow your heart"

to each man's motivations ... know what is your own motivation, and cherrish that which you enjoy in the experience

Texcdn wrote:

Hey dude...what's a "gingo?

And..BTW..your one hour session with Dr. Dino is up and you had quite a breakthrough with your rationalization of your frequent trips to CR. Please send me the check of $2,500.00 for your therapy sessions.

PS now I can really use a vacation.

_________________
Live today as it was your last day, for tomorrow may never come.

Thx Doctor Dino .... but heck youd just blow it on the Tute tables ... jk

BTW you had a great write up on Amon .... I really like it

Texcdn...

actually I think Dino would be found at the roulette wheel playing # 22!!

Pidd

Tex...mi amigo. We really are alike in many ways...and both are libras, for what that is worth.

I knew this was going to happen to you, but had no way of warning you. Sooner or later you were going to hit the wall. It happens to all of us. We wake up one day and ask the question....why am I really DOING this?

The wall is actually a good thing. It gives you a chance to stop and think....take a breather and really analyze yourself for a moment. When we first go down there, we want to Phuck anything that walks. If we can touch it, we can Phuck it. It is one of the truly most remarkable feelings I have ever had...to walk into that Bar and know....any one of them can be mine.

I remember one memorable day on my second trip when I was with 9 chicas in one day....including a wild foursome at Hotel Asia....man I would never go there again. There was a cockroach as big as one of the chicas.

After this wore off I started to go for more quality sessions. Of course I went astray with my Cristal sage for a time...but that too was a result of wanting more...not just sex. I wanted to get inside her head and find out what make her tick. Unfortunately, when I did that I saw the black hole and it scared the shit out of me. I realized what can happen to these babes after about six months of non stop phucking. You think WE Phuck alot down there....try every night....4 or 5 guys. It ruins them after a time.

One thing I have always tried to do is to extend the experience beyond the ordinary and....like you....to make a bond or a connection. I remember making friends with the street K*D and buying him a pair of shoes. Later, I took him and a few friends for lunch at KFC. I turned around and there were 11 of them behind me. Street never forgot it...and rewarded me on the last trip by giving me the Harem. I had no idea that I would ever even SEE Street again....much less get that incredible experience.

I have taken a bunch of chicas shopping. Not only do I get off on seeing them dressed up in some hot new outfit....but I KNOW that the sexo will go from great to incredible thanks to my generosity. I always get more out of it than I give, but I know it is not for everybody.

I have now had nine trips. Each one unique....different and unscripted. I would not change a one....and have never regretted a thing. I have enjoyed meeting lots of guys on the board and sharing our hobby. I have developed close friends down there that will greet me like I never left as soon as I get there again.

the truth is....we get to do something few mortal men get to experience. Live every minute of it. Love every minute of it. Maximize the experience and never look back.

_________________
ASTROGLIDE

Loved the posts of Texcdn and Prolijo. Simple free enterprise is wonderful. She has a surplus of sexual gratification; I have a surplus of financial gratification; we agree to a mutually beneficial trade, we smile, and both are happy. Adam Scott would be proud of us.

The posts here just get more and more thought provoking ....

Thinking deeper, I look at myself, and see a 34 yr old man, with a failed marriage (11yrs ago yikes young) and various relationships since then. I feel I am at a cross roads ... Do I find someone stateside and do the family thing? I have always been faithful in relationships, but I also get bored. This leads me to think my window to settle down with K*ds has sailed. Not to mention CR creates a "safe haven". You can let your mind and heart plunge in 100% ... But deep inside, you know the relationship (or whatever it is) is bounded ... either by the hour, by the trip, or some other time period.

I sure wish we were all in the same room discussing this.

IMHO, we give because we get. You do something for someone and you feel good about yourself for doing it.

It's why the US is the greatest country on earth. It's because we are kind, caring and generous. We've got it...... so we give it! We are barraged with media that demonstrates how much better off we are than most of the rest of the world. We are not mercenaries, we love life, ousrselves and others.

It is the thing that makes us great and the reason we should keep on doing it!

Here's the brutal and honest truth. Do you want to give it to someone who needs it and appreciates it or to someone who takes it for granted and expects it?

Many of us are not really "mongers." Sure there are guys who think it's all about phucking but I would venture they are lying to themselves. We do it (sex, gifts, money etc.) so we can feel good about ourselves.

Get it where you can I say. Nothing wrong with doing whatever it takes to feel good about yourself.

Someone should start a poll. How many of us have been burned by a relationship to the point that we NEED an alternative? It's too painful to try again. You've tried climbing that mountain so many times you just can't think about trying again. So...we have sought and found a reasonable justification and purpose beyond money, career and status.

We do it because it makes us happy!

We are kind, caring and generous to a fault. We've been exploited and abused beyond our ability to cope and understand. So.....we delude ourselves for the sake of experiencing (giving and getting) human kindness. We go and get it because we can't get it anyplace else.

SAD BUT TRUE! IMHO!

I could be 100% wrong and don't know shit from shinolla..............but I did stay at The Holiday Inn Express last night ............so there's a chance I'm not a complete idiot.

Rocco

Tex,

I think I know exactly what you mean. Personally, at 47 I fear I've already missed out on that family thing and with much regret. My own problem is that I'm much too picky. More "appropriate" women closer to my age rarely appeal to me and are often seem to be embittered divorcees. Someone recently posted about guys complaining about their ex's at the BM. I must have dated their ex's because I find that women like to complain just as much. And this doesn't even go to cover all the other baggage that gringas of ALL ages carry.

Incidentally, you mentioned male fidelity, which I also have always maintained. Could it be that is part of the baggage that we as gringos carry? It doesn't seem to impede latinos. They feel free to take on mistreses to escape that boredom you mentioned. As long as they keep it WELL hidden, latinas seem to much more willing to accept that as just something males do. Of course, if they find out they will fly into a histrionic show of jealousy, but at least they won't divorce you and take half your assets. I don't really know about this, but I thought it was an interesting twist on the subject of baggage to throw in.

Anyway back on my main point, young attractive vital women who are willing to spend some time with this slightly over the hill guy are much more easily available in places like CR (forget for the moment that they carry their own set of baggage). As I've said before, at least when it comes to DR putas, I'm a realist. I know the odds are long against her having genuine feelings for me or at least ones not heavily tinged by the financial factor and I know that even, if she does, longer term prospects for a stable relationship are not very good.

But I suppose in spite of this knowledge part of my mind still fantasizes with the "what if" possibility. If not with a DR puta perhaps with a non-pro? What if I found that one gal who was genuine? What if we were able to transcend our cultural and age differences and form a solid relationship. What if I found a girl even at this late stage in my life that I could settle down with and do the family thing or or at least experience the fatherhood with her K*D(s)? In my head I know its foolish, but in my heart the possibility has some appeal.

Where you and I may have a different perspective is in our "percentages". I wouldn't call it plunging in 100% with mind and heart if deep inside you feel another way. Call it 95% then. The difference comes in whether one keeps reality foremost in mind and harbors a fantasy or really lives out the fantasy but keeps it bounded by that reality.

In the end, I can't really tell you which crossroad to take, but I can lay out your options. They are in no particular order - seek out that family thing back in the US, seek it out in the CR or similar place or continue to enjoy short-term affairs. As many guys around here can attest and I have suggested above, all of these choices doesn't have to be mutually exclusive. But what I fear for guys like you or me is that pursuing this fantasy makes for an easy escape hatch that keeps us from pursuing what we think we may really want. My only suggestion for you is if you choose to continue the CR path and also still hope for a longerterm family experience, you at least seek it out among the non-pros in CR. Tat would be much more realistic and yield much higher odds of success



First off, I have to say I agree with nearly everything you wrote though I'm not sure about the above comment. I think you were referring to giving to relatively impoverished DR chicas as opposed to gringas back home. But I have to wonder how much the DR girls need it relative to most other women in CR or how much they take it for granted and expected given the number of gringos that go down there throwing their money around indiscriminately.



I agree completely with this view. There is nothing wrong with what we do which is why I removed the term monger from my handle. Another poster coined the term "Whoreticulturalist" which I like even though its more of a mouthful than monger, but then as you all know I never shyed away from long words.

The insights in this post are excellent. I appreciate everyone sharing their opinions and perspectives.

I agree ... 100% is a bit of a hyperbole ... it really is about 95%.

I think that the latin culture in general has envelope me. The passion, the sense of family. It now makes sense why I am working so har to learn spanish. I definately kow enough now to chat with any working gal ... even for a few days on like a beach trip .. but I want to learn more.

I also think this is not just limited to CR. I am now more intereste in exploring South america, and Europe. I know I will need to pick up Italian and Portuguese too ...

In general, I am rapidly wanting to become an international hobbyist

Tex I have talked about how the babes are ruined after about 6 months of non-stop phucking in the Del Rey. I have talked about how difficult it is for them to just quit and walk away for a variety of reasons. I have even suggested that the chicas get addicted to whoring, just like we do to mongering.

Tex, Mi Amgio. You know what....I think you may be in this for the long haul. Just like the chicas that can't get out of it after they start....after they overcome the stigma and the embarassment, the same thing happens to the guys.

I feel bad for younger guys that have never married and never had a family. How do you go back to the farm, after you've seen the big city? How do you go back to Gringaland, after you have been to paradise. It changes you in a hurry. You will never be able to give it up. Most guys we know would never do what we did, and would never know what we know.....so they accept life as it is in los Estados Unidos. But those of us who have been there....done that.....can never go back. It's just like Hotel California....you can check out for a time....but you can never leave.

Might as well face it, you're addicted to this now. I don't say this as a bad thing, just as reality. Accept it and deal with it now. Hey, life could be worse. What if you woke up tomorrow and you learned you could never go back to CR again. How would you feel then?

_________________
ASTROGLIDE

Id just have to hit Rio

jk .... good points

Texcdn, at 34 you are not over the hill and the possibility of family is certainly NOT out of the question. I married at 35 and from that marriage I have a beautiful 4 year old daughter that I wouldn't trade for all the sex in CR. Or anywhere else for that matter. It is my opinion, and only my opinion that if you want family DO IT. A failed marriage is nothing to be ashamed of, particularly when you are young. Look at the divorce rate, are you any different than the other 60% who have divorced? Are you now the wiser from it? Maybe so. Use that to your advantage.

As for finding a chica in the Del Rey. The odds are definately not good. And, quite frankly, it is a VERY TOUGH GIG. If I had to do it over I wouldn't do it again. But, I'm too far into it now. I had to deal with the fact that my girl was having sex daily with anyone who had the money to pay her. Can you deal with this? Can you deal with wanting to talk with the girl of your choice only to call and the phone is off? Wonder what that meant? As if I didn't know. Let's be realistic about another point. Was the initial meeting between the 2 of you a business transaction? My greatest fear was always that the next gringo was going to be better looking, have more money, nicer body etc... and one day she would call and say, "Lo siento, yo tengo otra novio." And frankly, when we would argue she would sometimes say that. But, I always knew she was just saying it to make me mad. The only thing that ever kept me sane through it all was that we always had a plan on when she was leaving the Del Rey. It was planned 3+ months in advance. My advice, if you DO want a working girl is you better have a plan and the means to carry that plan to it's end. If not you are pissin' in the wind. Cut your emotional and financial loss NOW. Go no further. You NEED a plan. Can you handle that emotional rollercoaster? Can you handle the financial commitment that it is going to take to have a relationship with a foreign girl? I know I will NEVER do it again. Listen to a man with first hand experience here. And with a working girl you will ALWAYS have doubts. If my relationship fails it will be because of me. I want and need to trust but always remember where you found her. She is far more experienced than you. When the subject of the DR comes up now, she promptly stops me in my tracks and says, "dapanz, puerta cerrar Costa Rica." In English.."the door is closed for Costa Rica." I hope so but the jury is still out as to whether you can take the bar out of the girl.

I have heard that some intro agencies are great if you are all about meeting a Latin girl. Honest, sincere women looking genuinely for love and not all about money. However, I do happen to know 2 CURRENT working girls who are looking for marriage. Hookers are people too, no matter how long they have been working. I agree that with time it will ruin most if not all of them. I admire the fact that you are learning Spanish because without it your relationship from afar is ruined. Since I started my relationship 7+ months ago my Spanish is at a different level than ever before. It is a requirement if your girl speaks no English. If people don't believe that they are dillusional.

Man do I agree with that one. I could go on and on about that one. Rocco, start a new thread. I'll participate I promise. I've been meaning to post on that subject.

Some of the girls really do need the money. I can also tell you that some of the cien, popular girls do take things for granted. I've had to do the smack down a few times. Here's another thing for ya Tex..I have spent a great deal of time in my girls apartment. Nice, well decorated place. I inquired about a few items. "Where did you get that?" Answer: gringo. Can you handle that? I've swallowed my pride time after time. Just something else to think about. Also, as far as money is concerned..some of them are horrible managers of money. How will this translate into a real life relationship? Probably just the way you would expect.

I had always been faithful stateside. But, like you and many other men, I got bored with the job, family etc...The advice that CR is a fantasyland is a good piece of advice. KEEP IT THAT WAY. I hate to admit this but I would come to CR as a married guy. Go home, feel great and then come back again. I had my cake and ate it too...for awhile. CR was probably the single biggest reason for the decline in what I had here. As many have joked it is addictive and just as destructive as gambling, alcohol or drugs. How much money have you spent in CR? Could that money have been better spent? In my case the answer is WITHOUT doubt, yes. I remember a post by Lee in which he described guys like us. We are like alcoholics tempting fate by entering the bar and sitting down. Oh, just one drink will be alright...yeah, uh huh. Just like us..I won't get too close to the girl, I'm too smart for that and I know what's going on. ....yeah, uh huh. BE CAREFUL AMIGO. You seem like a guy with an open heart. Read my advice from someone who has been there. If you want something from CR, you better have a plan. And, the plan needs to be your plan not hers.

They believe LESS of what we say to them than we do of what they say to us. I agree 100%. I know my girl has been made empty promises in the past. She has never outright admitted it, even denied it. But, I have ears and can listen. Why are the women jaded? Because of US. Deal with it..it's the truth.

This is your crack cocaine, son. We all have it. This is yours. Just my opinion and I'm not saying that to throw stones. I know what my crack cocaine is in life. It appears you have an excellent job and make great money but, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that you have spent far in excess of what you had ever expected. It will eventually turn into something you never expected. I'll recap..you are not too old for a family. DO IT. Have a Ch*ld. I could get religious on you here and quote how our maker views Ch*ldren. Don't miss out on that opportunity in life. YOU WILL REGRET IT. I never wanted a Ch*ld. Now that I have one, I would die for her. She is far more important than any $50 hooker in CR or anywhere else. Only you can decide if you want a CR girl, working girl, gringa..etc. But, if you want a working girl or foreign girl have a plan. Think about the emotional and financial costs involved.

dapanz1

_________________
Paradise= Sitting outside the Bodega in Panama City about 1 am. Drinking cool Balboas with cool friends and blazin' hot Colombianas. I want to be there..RIGHT NOW!

Great post DP,
This is joked about a lot but from what I see and have experienced personally it is no joke, and my previous comments about having a strong mindset to keep it all under control is something I think we all have to deal with- from the start or we will be forced to eventually.
Talking with an amigo recently he says"I wish we'd have found CR 10 years ago" I agreed but after thinking about this it probably would have been a financial disaster the due to my hormones and immaturity back then. I wasn't ready for it and would be going as much as Tex, hell I might have even "sold the farm" and headed down to stay.
This brings up another serious "side-effect" of CR, how our perception of women/relationships back home can change drastically. Are you saying that the CR hobby contributed to your marriage ending? It's no secret how most guys come to view even dating gringas as a waste of time and money, myself included, yet I am now rethinking this attitude and attempting to put it all into a realistic perspective.

_________________

Living well is the best revenge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwUtj_YnNoY