www.CostaRicaTicas.com

I know much has been written on this subject, but after reading Lurkers winning post, and the fact that after a 7 day 7th trip this year (since May 31), I hopped on a plane and went back the following weekend, I decided I really need to look in a mirror and answer this question for myself.

As always I appreciate comments from board members. In advance though, if you want to trash me, please feel free to pass. I am sincerely looking for advice from more seasoned hobbyists who are or have felt as I do.

When I first came to CR in May, it was for one reason ... sex. I had just joined the board, and didnt know a soul. I met some fun guys on my first trip, but really enjoyed sampling tall, short, dark light etc etc ...

By my third trip though, I found myself not needing to hop on someone every three hours. At that time, I enjoyed the meaning of pura vida. Relaxing, forgetting the stress back home, making friends, learning the language and culture and grabbing the occaisional girl.

Over that time, I also read more posts, and it got me to thinking ... Am I a GFE, GFFE or LAL guy. Well that was easy. I have always been (even after a failed marriage where she was cheating) and to my last breath will be a GFE guy. I found this board very helpful as I read both perspectives and what to watch out for.

By that time, I had met Camila, and like many folks, couldnt get her off my mind. Sure I'd still do a 3 some at ZB, but Camila was on my mind. Then by accident, this second last trip 2 weeks ago, I met Cristina the model. The fact I met her, I know she is just a different spin on the same old same old working girls. But I really did enjoy my time with her. Sure she plays it well; meets me at the airport, gives little gifts, wants to refuse money etc. But you know ... when I look in the mirror, that is what I like.

For me it isnt the money. I have a good job. I dont send money to the gals I talk to, but I do bring things for them and their family (they havent asked for things .. I just like it). Talking to a seasoned member last trip at dinner, he wisely said the money some guys send isnt the problem. And that made sense. If a guy gets his fix sending money, or bringing things for them, or taking them shopping ... thats his choice.

But I asked myself ... WHY do I like to do little things? I know it is not because I want to get married. I know I still like some strange. So why.

Then it kind of hit me. It isnt a GFFE illusion I want, or "real" feelings. I want, even for a small bit of time, to touch someones life and heart a bit. I have done this with one of the most hard core Columbianas at the DR, and a semi pro.

I am sure half of you are rolling on the floor by now, but does anyone else feel this way?

I do not give beyond my means to the girls. I am not jealous, or trying to keep them from working. I really just do get my motivation by trying to make a small difference in a persons life.

This hread was intended to see if anyone had the same motivation. I am happy doing what I do .. really.

Take care

Tex... Every few months this comes up.... So many reasons... This was a great thread on this..

https://costaricaticas.com/phpbb2/vi ... 21&start=0

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The Boss of All Bosses!!! Hey I'm a drunk alcoholics go to meetings!

When I was stationed in Turkey 20 years ago one of the guys in my shop told me, 'You can't save them all'.

I've always tried to remember that whenever I've traveled to a third-world country.

That said, if I can bring a little smile or happiness or joy to SOMEONE then it's at least a small contribution. They help me enjoy my trip so I help them feel better about themselves or their life, even if only for a short time.

As to why I've returned to Costa Rica after the first trip last year it's a combination of things. Of course the girls but that's really not the driving force since they can be found in many places.

Three other factors are: it's easy to get to, the prices are reasonable and I like to play blackjack and I can do that in San Jose.

But one big reason is the guys I've met and become friends with through CRT. If not for this website I probably wouldn't have returned. The comradery as well as the discounts make a great trip even better.

Good points.

It is funny, because I am not trying to save them .... just do little things that can mean something. Like an old PS2 for one gals son, or a little xmass train for a tree for another. Or Pimsleur english MP3s.

I dont love them (no time ... Im always off to see Erika at Oasis)

But I do flirt with the danger of letting them touch my heart .... and that I know isnt wise ....

My 2 cents worth guys... and strictly my opinion and experience

It's about Freedom...

Free to do whatever or whoever you want without the restrictions our society & culture in US imposes (and we accept).

It's about going back 50 years in time, being strong and firm and also caring and giving... about spending time with women to EXPECT you to take charge and "take care" of them....

It;s about being able to bring happines into some lives ( especially the chicas K*ds,)who would never know some of the material joys of what our financial assets can provide...

It's about fantasy... living the life I always wanted at 25 but was to busy making a career to live....

It's about being an old fart and having a 20 year old honey tell you lies on how good your "really" are.....

It's about taking the time and having a relationship with a non working Tica and seeing how they really live... spending a night in a tin shack in San Sabastian or Dessamperados that surves as a house for 6 or 7 people where I wouldn't even park my car in it here in US...

It's about giving back some of the good fortune I've experienced in my life to change the lives of others...

It's about sex....

Wow... said all that and I'm stone cold sober.... strange world..!

It's been a pleasure to know many of the gentlemen on this board who all enjoy the illusion but also are really good people, have a genunine concern for many of the decent chicas ( NO not the Cien Babes or the Twit) and really have a soft spot in their hearts and have changed some lives... even though only temporarily...

OH, did I say it was also about sex????

Peace brothers...

PIDD

OH... I forgot.. It's also about Sex...

PIDD

Great reply Pidd ... look foreward to seeing you again soon

Tex,
I see nothing foolish about what you have written. You seem to have your feet on the ground and are realistic about what you are doing. It may not be GFFE but its not quite GFE either. You seem to realize that she is playing a part and you're okay with that as long as she plays it well. You also realize that she's not going to stop seeing other guys and you're okay with that too. You don't put into it any more than you get out of it and thats also okay. Sure, you may be paying more than you would have to purely for the sex, but you're after and getting more out of it than just pure sex. It is this intangible attraction that you are trying to get a better handle on and that is what has you uncertain. My advice is to not overanalyze it too much as long as it is not driving you to ruin or putting you at risk and just enjoy yourself.

However, I have to disagree somewhat with you and your friend on the following. If the money some guys send is not a problem (at least for them), what IS the problem? Is it really their choice if they are thinking with their heart (or their gonads) and are being conned? If they get their "fix" by being fooled, they may not be aware of the problem but does that make it right?

Personally, I don't see any inherent problem with a guy paying for more than just sex provided that a couple of basic prerequisites exist. First, he can CHOOSE to ignore certain realities about their relationship in order to enjoy the fantasy as long as he harbors no serious illusions about the long term prospects. Secondly, he should be calling the shots on how he CHOOSES to dispense his cash and not be duped into paying for something he is not really getting.

In your case, there is no problem. You are getting what you pay for.

Even in the so-called "Cristal Saga", our friend Astro maintained some reasonable level of control over how he spent his dough. He only made installments on her braces, kept her demands in check (sometimes saying NO), only paid while he was with her (in effect paying for the time he got to enjoy with her) and, though some may feel he paid a heavy premium for what he was getting, what he paid for what he got was worth it to him. Where he slipped, was in beliveing there was something more to his relationship than was really there and even that can be forgiven as Cristal herself was going through many changes during the time since when he first met her when she was still fresh and unspoiled by the DR.

Then there are guys like poor Gigbag, who, falsely thinking he had some exclsuive relationship with his "novia" and was enabling to escape her work at the DR, sent large sums of money to her from the US. Of course she was playing the same game on several guys and was contiuing to seek out more suckers at the DR. He was out and out scammed, fooled into shelling out his dough and not getting what he thought he was paying for. I don't see how you could say that is anything but a problem. Read his posts. He certainly sees it that way.

Oh yeah, what are my own motivations? I don't think they are altogether different from yours. I like to think that I connect with my favoritas on more than a purely hooker-john level, so I am definitely not a LAL guy. But I also realize that I can never fully escape the fact that I've at least met these girls through just such a level. Add the fact that however nice I may treat these girls I'm still old enough to be their father and come from a far wealthier background than theirs. Because of all that more likely than not it mostly my wealth that draws them to me. I think I'm talking about the same type of relationship as most GFE guys, but because of these things I personally can't really think of her as a real novia and so call it GFFE.

I also have a real problem in having a chica think she can con me. Of course we can feed each others GFE/BFE fantasies, but lets be at least straight with each other that it isn't anything more than it really is a pleasant friendship, where one regularly helps out the other with sexual gratifaction and financial aid. Is that so much to ask?

Also heavy in my attraction to CR the country, beyond the chicas, are the comradery with a great bunch of guys, beautiful natural wonders and outdoor physical activities to enjoy and the Pura Vida attitude I can slip into while I am there.

Tex...it was good hanging with you your last trip down.

I have made posts on this in the past...but one quick response that pops to mind is...there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a giving person...and enjoying the act of giving. Obviously in this case it's probably not pure charity as we usually get something in return . ANd it is always important to keep the distinction between love and services rendered. But I too always feel a little desire to lighten the load of some of these hardworking gals by treating them with respect and yes...giving little gifts or a massage to them. Most of them are still human too.
Good reflections here.

I could go on and on about my feelings about what you have written Tex. I think to summerize I would say that hedonism is what we pursue and it is just fine so long as we don't hurt anyone. We all take from our CR experiences what we want to take. You get from CR what you put into it. Treat the chicas with respect and you are more likely to get it in return. You have created some special relationships because you were ready willing and able to do that. Enjoy,enjoy,enjoy.

thx VB

I may be down this weekend

That crystalizes it for me, it is SO refreshing to be down there and relax with the well-defined roles. No political correctness and no shame in being a horny man. Similar to europe they know burying ones libido leads to huge problems.

I come back to Gringa-land and it seems girls have scowls so often. The ticas know their true power lies in being utterly feminine, not trying to match us on our level. The US seems warped on many levels now that I've traveled.

Oh and 3 girls a day too. Though I love every one of them.

Tex,
I'm a little perplexed by your post. Are you saying that your "newfound" motivation for your trips to CR and all the chicas you screw is to "touch someones life and heart, to bring a little joy into a chica's life?" If so I think you need to take more than a glance in that mirror and look deeper beyond the denial.
Having firsthand experience in the addiction/recovery field I know that people can justify and rationalize all kinds of behavior, drinking, drugs, gambling and yes-sex. Now I know that touching someone's life and being a positive influence is a great feeling, it's part of what we're supposed to be doing(IMO) and occasionally a result of our kindness to the chicas, but to claim it as your primary motivation- I don't think so. If that's true and you want to spread joy and happiness by touching lives why not get involved in a local church and go on mission trips to CR? Your dinero would go a lot further and help more people than the occasional chica. Because you, like myself have a different mission-
We go to CR because we love to phuck, to fulfill our lust and fantasies- it's a quick-fix, an escape from our reality, the bitchy-cold wife/GF or loneliness and everything else at home, the rush of leading a double life, with women that are so hot and sweet. And we can phuck all we want without all the complications and crap we'd normally have to put up with. What guy in here hasn't fantasized about phucking hot young women since puberty, and after many rejections, failed relationships, marriages, whatever, found CR and finally able to "catch-up" and make it come true.
That said, being mostly a GFE guy myself, I do know exactly what you're talking about and enjoy it myself-getting to know the chicas more and more each trip, last trip was the first time I brought gifts and it was a blast seeing the chicas light up when I gave them away.

I have had to take that look in the mirror myself recently amigo, and realized like with most things I enjoy, that the old rule-"all things in moderation" is beginning to nag at me. Looking at the time and dinero I've spent in CR this year I know my trips will have to decrease and I will have to exercise some discipline (ugh) and re-focus on my career, finances and goals. CR has become a MAJOR "distraction" to say the least and on the verge of an addiction, as I'm sure it is/was/will be for many guys.
Not wanting to change the topic but I'd like to hear any feedback on this from guys that have been going down or in the hobby a while, how your perspective changed and you kept it all under control. Let's face it, CR is NOT for everyone-there's many guys I know that could just not handle what we do-it takes a strong mindset and certain type of personality to "get away with it."
And I love getting away with it!

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Living well is the best revenge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwUtj_YnNoY

Great insight Paco.

To correct myself ... I do like sex. But recently, I have had nights where I was even with a girl and just relaxed with no sex. I think I not only like helping them, but also the sex part of it means you get into personalities and inner things that say a church mission would not.

I admit. I have an OCD personality. Whether school, career, ballroom dancing, or CR ... I tend to try to discover every nook and crany ... in a very short time period.

I too know I can not simply keep travelling there 1-2 x per month (ok I could ...)
But like all compulsions, my fancy will turn elsewhere

This is a great thread, and I am glad it is going here and now as I just got back from my first trip and I have a lot of stuff bouncing around in my brain over this. I had a LOT of fun, and a a fair number of chicas while I was there (can't say a LOT, no way I can keep up with some of you mongering machines)

Of all of them there is one that I cannot get out of my head. She was not the hottest, or the cutest, or the wildest in the sack. She was the one who I felt like there might have been a real connection, the one that shined more brightly to me for who knows why.

I have been going to strip clubs since I could get in, and mongering off and on for about as long, and never ever, even after amazing sessions have I ever had the urge to go buy one of the working girls a gift. I have never thought it might be nice to exchange email addresses with one of these women.

Maybe it is the lack of evidence of self hatred in these girls, Every working girl I have been with in the states has always had something that gave evidence of a track to self destruction. I saw none of that in the girls I was with in CR.

my 2c :/

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Beauty is truth, truth beauty.
That is all ye know on earth,
and all ye need to know.