www.CostaRicaTicas.com

An oxymoron? These true things came from Military experiences (thankfully, mostly not mine, but I added the blue comments):

"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush." -- Infantry Journal

"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." -- Joe Gay

"Don't draw enemy fire; it irritates the people around you."

"Any ship can be a minesweeper...once."

"If you see an Air Force bomb technician running, follow him."

"You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3." -- Paul F. Crickmore (test pilot) (Ask me about the F4 driver who thought he was over Mexico...)

"The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire." (Unless you are #3 in the "On Fire" pattern and need the fuel to get to your crash site...had it happen.)

Blue water Navy truism: "There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky."

From an old carrier sailor: "If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe."

"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash." (Dash placard observed on a Seneca panel: If you lose an engine on take-off, crash straight ahead.)

"Without ammunition, the USAF would be just another expensive flying club."

"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; if ATC screws up . . . the pilot dies."

"Never trade luck for skill."

The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are: "Why is it doing that?", "Where are we?" And "Oh Shit!" (Oh Shit! are the last words on the tape, generally.)

"Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers."

"Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to complete the flight successfully." (Without both airspeed and altitude, you better have some brains...)

Old ATC Axiom: "Our record is still perfect; every aircraft we sent up, came down."

"Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag to store dead batteries."

"Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground who is incapable of understanding or doing anything about it." (Ex-ATC: "More famous last words...")

"The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you." -- attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot)

"A pilot who doesn't have any fear probably isn't flying his plane to its maximum." -- Jon McBride, astronaut

"If you're faced with a forced landing, fly the thing as far into the crash as possible." -- Bob Hoover (renowned aerobatic and test pilot)

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." -- Army's magazine of preventive maintenance

"Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you."

"There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime." -- Sign over squadron operations desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, Ariz., 1970

"If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to."

Basic Flying Rules: "Try to stay in the middle of the air. Do not go near the edges of it. The edges of the air can be recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there." (I have given this advice more than once...)

Mooney Drivers: "You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal."

As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives, the rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and asks, "What happened?" The pilot's reply, "I don't know, I just got here myself!" -- attributed to Ray Crandell (Lockheed test pilot)

_________________
"Your love gives me such a thrill
but your love don't pay my bills,
I NEED THE MONEY!" - John Lee Hooker

Disclaimer: The above is merely the opinion of the author unless specific scientific data is included.
Your mileage may vary. https://costaricaticas.com/phpBB2/viewto ... 978#206978

Also, there are old pilots and bold pilots, but there are no old bold pilots.

_________________
Providing humanitarian assistance to self employed chicas, one cash grant at a time.

There is a photo of an old time bi-plane all tangled with a solo tree. The caption reads:

Aviation, like the sea, is not inherently dangerous; but it is terribly unforgiving of any carelessness, incapacity, or neglect.

I hung it on the header above the stairs leading to the control tower. It was the last thing controllers looked at as they climbed into a headset.

_________________
"Your love gives me such a thrill
but your love don't pay my bills,
I NEED THE MONEY!" - John Lee Hooker

Disclaimer: The above is merely the opinion of the author unless specific scientific data is included.
Your mileage may vary. https://costaricaticas.com/phpBB2/viewto ... 978#206978

Oops...double post. Guess I'll use this space for a story.

I was working as the supervisor in the control tower of an international airport. We had a Congressman in the cab for a tour, along with the staff manager who was very busy trying to keep her lips joined with his ass.

He showed up with an attitude and started to ask one of my controllers if she knew shy controllers should be paid more than Congressmen. I told him I knew why and pulled him away from her so that she could work airplanes and not have to break her concentration while she eviscerated him.

As he stepped away from my pissed controller, I pulled my headset off and handed it to him. "Anytime you want to trade jobs, just let me know." I said, "I know I can do your job...". Staff manager turned white. Got to talk to the boss that day...

_________________
"Your love gives me such a thrill
but your love don't pay my bills,
I NEED THE MONEY!" - John Lee Hooker

Disclaimer: The above is merely the opinion of the author unless specific scientific data is included.
Your mileage may vary. https://costaricaticas.com/phpBB2/viewto ... 978#206978

"Ejection seats are for cowards. Plus, you can get more bombs on target if you stick around a little longer." -- Marine Air Wing saying.

"If the helicopter isn't broke, fix it anyway." -- Same

My favorites:

P = Pilot, S=Support Crew (signoff)

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.