www.CostaRicaTicas.com

After reading the numerous responses to Prostoners dilema and Chi"s drama I feel a need to chime in a bit..

Here goes, I could go on for a long time but i'll be brief, maybe Projilo can fill in the missing links

Latin girls like older men...may or may not be true, but if it is True it means that a 23 year old Latina will go with a 29 year old not a 60 year old.

I hate to break the news but please get real...never, never, never will any of you (over 50) ever hook up with a 20 something girl from the gulch no matter what either of you say...Money can't do it for any length of time...it's Hollywood and cheap Novelas period.

Secondly, the starting point is prostitution...this is a job for them...remember what it's like to go to work..it generally sucks..no pun intended..and they are simply selling sex for money and you guys think your buying relationships...get real ...it's your fantasy and their job and never the two will match..


Damn. I love this place

While I don't think this is 100% true, and I wouldn't be quite as harsh, I'd have to agree with the general sentiment of this post...

It is harsh, but true. He hit the nail on the head.

I would have to agree with the assessment of Mr. Fox.

No, no, no. THIS one is different!!!

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You ALWAYS have an option ....... "NEXT" !!!

Two points I would seperate. In any eurocentric/capitilist culture most women are going to attracted to the best provider age not withstanding. what goes on in the gulch has nothing to do with latin culture its Vegas legalized.

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But mama, that's where the fun is

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I have to go along with the general line of reasoning. The acceptable age range is probably closer to 15 years for Latinas (maybe 18 ) as opposed to 7 or 8 from Gringas.

I would say that you can still have a quality relationship with these girls, but you should be realistic with the fact that your relationship is based on money and notions of monogamy are fantasy.

The one thing that I have learned is that there is nothing wrong with relationships based on money (sans monogamy). They are a lot less hassle than the other kind.

LivinCR, thanks for posting this reality check.

Here's an anecdote that might argue with your point a bit. I think the age disparity becomes less important if the relationship doesn't start out with prostitution.

Costa Rican dicho (saying): "Al gato mas viejo va el raton mas tierno." To the oldest cat goes the tenderest mouse.

When I was in Dominical last year, I was invited to a quinciniera. A girl's 15th birthday in Latin America is her passage from girl to woman. I expressed gratitude at being honored with such an invitation but couldn't attend. The mother who invited me was saddened by my polite refusal, because she also has a 17 year-old daughter who is looking for a real novio (i.e. fiance') and marriage. Even though I turned fifty this year, the mother (fifteen years my junior) thought I'd make a good suitor for her daughter! So, maybe the age disparity isn't such a big deal the farther away one gets from the Gulch. :!

I don't know if this is typical (I doubt it), but it can happen. Here in the States, I also know a 55 year-old man, upper middle class income who has dated the same stripper 30 years his junior for four years.

I agree though that if it starts with prostitution, the relationship seems doomed. But here's what I would be willing to try:

I could see myself living with a prostitute as an "amigo con derechos," or "friend with benefits" as we say up north. I don't have enough jealousy to prohibit her from working; it is after all her job. If the financial burden of keeping house were equally shared between gringo and hooker, it might work.

I do have a couple hooker pals here in the Northland. No, I don't use their services. One is involved with another woman about her age, but the other is living with a dude some 25 years older than she. So who knows?

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Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

I agree that it's a bad, bad idea to look for love among the working girls, I think the generalization is overly broad. I don't want to sound like I'm encouraging guys like me to go find a young girlfriend in the Del Rey. I am NOT. Having said that, I have several chicas in their 20s who have proved to my satisfaction that they are sincere and honest in their feelings for me. I know of at least 4 who would be very happy to become my 'novia.'

I can hear the following from my CRT colleagues:

* You're delusional.
* They are just acting
* Yeah, but it would never work out
* (fill in the blank)

I have a 46 year old friend who is living with his pregnant, 20 year old gf (his K*D). Her family is thrilled to have him in the family. Will it work out? I don't know. I made a short trip back to my hometown last month. In my 2 year absence I learned that several marriages I thought were very solid had broken up. They were approximately equal in age and all that stuff.

I don't think age is NECESSARILY a deal breaker, but common sense tells you that the odds aren't good. Likewise, it's not impossible to have a good relationship with a working girl, but once again, the odds are against you.

One last thing... It's the POVERTY that makes CR what it is. Even a fat 50 something Gringo can look pretty good to a 20 something chica whose other options bleak. A lot of these girls will stretch their standards for a guy who can support them (and her family). Does this mean you should chase 20 somethings? No. It just means that 20 somethings exist who will take you, Mr. 50 something.

I should probably just have kept my mouth shut here, since the overall point is true: Don't fall in love with a hooker

Even so, I can't help myself from pointing out that there are exceptions to most broad generalizations.

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"The only normal people are those you don't know very well." Joe Ancis

While it has been well documented that I agree with this general notion...I would suggest one difference. I think there are many hot Latinas in their 30s to early 40s who are in great shape and looking for romance in addition to security. Lets face it...most women throughout the WORLD marry for security more than "Love"...this isnt just about prostitutes. So...I think older guys can find "love" with significantly younger Latinas that can last.

Another aspect that contributes to success with Latina relationships is...how attentive and attractive we keep ourselves in relationship to them. Money covers a multitude of sins...we all have seen the rich fat slobs on their yachts in Florida surrounded by 20 something bikini babes. We know what that is all about. But...I have known both Latina and Gringa hot women who have been truly "in love" with men 20+ years their senior. These have tended to be more about a guy being "interesting", romantic and attentive...aspects they tend not to find in younger, pecker driven men.

The keys to success in long term younger latina relations is...speak the language, demand their respect (be a little bit latino/macho acting), and make sure their needs are being taken care of. They will not respect an easy "pushover" or sugardaddy. Love comes to those who are "lovable". If you are a negative, angry, bitter person who doesnt take care of even basic human hygiene...dont expect any of these chicas to find you attractive. Sure, for enough money they will spend an hour with you...but dont expect "love".

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All that a man achieves and all that he fails to achieve is the direct result of his own thoughts...

Bilko, you make many really good points. (Never mind the Critics)

Relationships of all kinds are difficult and in IMHO they are ALL more trouble than they are worth in the long run. There is no one set formula for success or failure.

The odds against you with a CR hooker probably a lot worse than you would find otherwise. By definition, 99% of us that frequent the gulch are not successful in our relationships in the past, so the deck is probably stacked against most of us before we even get off the plane.

But that does not make it impossible. Many of these girls are fine women in a tough position. The difficult part is distinguishing the good from the bad. Then, if you do find a good one, she has to be willing to put up with your miserable ass. So yes, for most of us the odds are definitely stacked against us!

To be fair to our dear Putas in Costa Rica, I have to say that the most cunning evil bitches that I have ever been associated with have all been American.

I meant to add one more reflection...WHERE TO FIND NORMAL LATINAS. I went to a play last night here in Panama City with my Colombiana and another couple. I was struck by how many attractive Panamanian women were in the audience...and in the cast. And I found many of them making very direct eye contact with me...a 50 something obvious gringo...even with my partner there with me. It made me think...why didnt I shop more at these kinds of events back when I was "single"? I think a lot of relationship seekers miss out by not getting "out of the gulch" more often.

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All that a man achieves and all that he fails to achieve is the direct result of his own thoughts...

Wise and well said. Thanks.

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Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

I'll stick to playing chicas like I play poker. I don't play impossibly long odds.

I agree with Bilko's sentiment. Also I do know of six or seven long term relationships with Gringo's and ex-working girl that are succesful by most standards. They seem to have a few key common elements:

1) They live as a couple here in Costa Rica
2) The gringo has enough income to live comfortably and support the family. (three of these cases the income and lifestyle is very moderate by our standards but nice by Tico standards.
3) Every single case involves a Ch*ld or Ch*ldren had together

I know of no succesful cases where the relationship is long distance or where the girl is still working "part time"

As many of you know, I have a seven month live in Novia who worked before I met her, Although we never had a customer relationship between us. She is young and Nica and the last things she wants to do is to ever work again. Like most young Latin women she wants to marry and have K*ds (she has none now) Flamers can start now I am not gullible at all (no RFMs ever etc, but I am convinced that her feeling for me are real. I am the one who struggles with thoughts of infidelity and uncertainty.

As I have said many times, Age difference, cultural differences and Chica background all make it more difficult but not impossible. Lately it seems we have a rash of over opinionated black or white no gray area rantings rather than a discussion of the all the shades of grey.

As a final point, some of our membership seem to look down on the girls from a moral point of view. I find this the ultimate in hypocrisy. As mongers we all frequent or have frequented prostitutes. They are doing it out of necessity or at least have more compelling reasons than we to do this. Most of us are worldly, educated and have reasonable incomes.
It is strange how someone who thinks a prostitute is beneath marriage would expect a non-prostitute to accept someone who routinely pays for sex with prostitutes as a good marriage candidate.

Anyway, just my dos colones and I hope we get back to civil discussions of various points of views which is where the real value of the board is for me.

BKTUNA
I am never going home