www.CostaRicaTicas.com

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Check out http://weluvlatinas.com/ for the web's best info on the latin american monger lifestyle...

I think what Bilko did was acceptable under his circumstances. They maybe all hookers, but these “hooker’s” are people too. Now with that said I agree with what Orange said under his said circumstances. I would have done the exact same thing. Each circumstance should be handled to fit that circumstance.

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Now, I am back in the game!

This might surprise my pals VB, Tman, Bilko et al, but I think in this case you might be a little too harsh. Should you go with her for 1.5 hours for $200? Absolutely not. Is she out of her frigging mind for thinking that is a reasonable offer? Damn tooting. But maybe in her mind that $40 an hour was far too little. Or even the $60 when you factor in that she just spent the better part of the evening with you and might have gone with someone else for an hour for that much and been back alread. Calculated another way, 1.5hours in the bar + 1.5 hours in the room = 3 hours, divide $200 by 3 and you get only $67/hour. Granted that is not a full 3 hours of "back" time, but she nay not see it that way. She may see only the other gringos she might have been with during that time. No one said these chicas were logical. My point is that while she may be mostly to blame for her outlandish idea of her self-worth you're also partially to blame for not making clear from the beginning the sort of gringo you were. After all, as crazy as her offer may seem to you there are SOME gringos that would foolishly pay it.

In this case I think VB really does have the best approach. Don't rush right into negotiations but let her know from the git-go that cien will be definitely out of the question. Having failed to do that, maybe you do at least owe her some sort of propina for spending a whole 1.5 hours listening to your broken spanish and not working on some other guy instead who just might have paid what she was asking for.

But, like I said before, whether we're talking TMan's 1 hour or Orange's 1.5, both are a far cry from the casual amount of time that usually occurs before the business question is normally broached or even the brief amount of time after you make a deal and discover she's a Jeckyl and Hyde.

Depends on how she handles herself .

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"Run silent, run deep"
Spunk glazed Chicas are the building blocks of the universe!

Heard all your points...here's my 2 cents...

I believe I am still learning negotiation but had I been in this scenerio I wud have asked her for another drink and watched her for another 10 minutes...still if I feel she is distracted and no more interested then I wud asked her what is that she likes to do when we go there I wud make my expactations very clear to her....

In a way i am giving her a fair chance to say no and go if she dosn't find the deal anymore attractive....

Paying money dosn't make any sense to me as I already paid for her drink and as I had invited her for drink...and its not me who is not interested, its her thus no extra money honey...

I believe this is the kind of scenerio we all faced some time or other...why not share our experiences to handle such scenerios...

I wud love to read negotiation tectics and scenerios from experts...

I luv u all....Raj

Disclaimer: This is just my thoughts and I do not expect others to agree with it or not...

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Smiles...Raj

The way it turned was that the CRT who was sitting with her, said no to her offer, and left. She did not handle it well, she pouted and complained to her amigas and the other guys at the table (there was a group of us) and was pretty angry. Then another CRT swooped in and took her back for much less, if I remember correctly.

I won't reveal the identities of those involved. It's not my place to do that.

Prolijo said

All of these situations are "situational ethics" . If the chica is a bitch and just playing you heavy...just be firm, say goodbye, and you owe them nothing. And even if it is long term negotiations and she is sticking around for more and more bartering...you owe her nothing in my book. Where I was coming from is...if you have been partying and flirting with the girl with no intentions of being with her...or are just looking for conversational company or someone to "practice spanish" with...then I think you should give them something for their time. Of course, if she asked YOU for a drink(s) and elects to stick around for that...then that is her compensation for her time. I have seen a number of guys play games with these girls, use up their time, with no intentions of going with them. These guys give the rest of us a bad "name". I never play a girl on. If I am not interested, I tell them upfront and soon...so they dont waste their time...or mine. BUT...if I have initiated a discussion or at a place like the KL taken alot of their time dancing etc...then I think a tip appropriate. Hope that clarifies some of my "situational ethics"

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All that a man achieves and all that he fails to achieve is the direct result of his own thoughts...

Sounds like it was handle the way that I would handle it then.

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Now, I am back in the game!

I tottaly agree. If she handles herself well and wasn't all business. If I sat there and talked to her for an hour and she didn't go crazy ordering the most expensive drink. I might pay her for her time for talking. But that all depends on the girl.

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Now, I am back in the game!

Seeing as how he was out as much time as the chica was not to mention all the money he probably spent on drinks, maybe she should have compensated him for his wasted time. Of course, that is absurd, but it makes a point that the chica is not the only person who loses out when a deal fails to materialize. In this case, the case could be made that gringo is no more responsible for that than the chica, so why should have to pay? Did this chica mention to them in all her complaints what amount she'd been asking for or did she conveniently leave that part out? I'd also be interested to hear her amigas take on the situation. If she did mention her asking price, did her amigas visibly sympathize with her (quite possibly) or did they privately think "Well, damn gurl! Waddya think he was going to do when you demanded such a ridiculous amount?" (IMHO, also a distinct possibility). You seem to suggest in your allegory that, this guy trashed his own reputation by not allowing himself to be walked on and that the "nicer" guys always finish first. This guy's only real failure was in not even trying to negotiate her down (though given how out of line she was I could understand why he may have not thought that possible). The other guy just took advantage of the ground the first CRT set. The bottom line was probably her amigas thinking "maybe I shouldn't go for that much myself or my gringo might walk too" and this crazy chica learned something despite her complaints because she ultimately agreed to a much lower and more reasonably amount. Being the nice guy is certainly the way to go ... up to a point. But at some point you cross that fuzzy line between being simply a nice guy to being a sap that because he puts up with more shit than he should only encourages the chicas to take advantage of him more.

Some linguisics analyst might find this post interesting on just how we seem to be talking about the same thing but really aren't. I see at least three different points being discussed as if they were the same thing.

My last shot here on this: I didn't give her the 5k because I felt I owed it to her. I didn't give it to her to increase my PR value in her eyes or the eyes of other chicas. I made the offer (5k and go or 25k and go with ME) to satisfy my curiosity, primarily.

Projilo is right in his analysis of the contract/bargain approach. In the particular situation I described, there was no contract/bargain before I made my 5 vs 25 offer. I could have just said 'sorry but I have changed my mind' and walked away before I made my offer.

I look at the girls like salesmen. I don't owe her anything for taking up a reasonable amount of time to hear her pitch and decide if I want to buy or not. If I am not interested at all I usually try to end the pitch politely and quickly. If I am interested I limit my generosity to buying a drink or 2 at most before I make my offer, and I feel no guilt or obligation if we can't come to terms.

I also agree with those who say that treating the chicas fairly and perhaps generously is no sin and can result in nice surprises sometimes.

It seems to me the disagreement here is more about what we are actually talking about than about what is appropriate in any particular situation.

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"The only normal people are those you don't know very well." Joe Ancis

Amen Orange, Amen!
Any meetings coming up int he near future around here?
Luis

I understand what Bilko is trying to say. He picked up on the possibility of a bad session, and hence tested her to see if he was correct. If he was incorrect then she might decline his 5k and they still have the original agreement. The only flaw is that these are street smart girls and she now has 5k and can move on to her next mark and make 25k thus netting 30k. Who’s to say what the right course of action is, but if you feel your actions were the correct actions “for you”, then that is what is correct.

What everyone else is referring to is a question of ethics and personal preference for the debatable question of time spent vs compensation. I look at it like a job interview. You’re interviewing possible candidates for a position you wish to fill…it just happens to be you really intend on filling her. When someone comes to an interview they don’t get paid. You give your own time in order to hopefully gain something. You don’t get paid until the employer first decides to hire you, a salary is negotiated, and you actually clock in and do some work. It’s really no different with these women. They are being interviewed by you and if the interview goes well they get paid…and laid. Unless you’ve implied or mentioned some sort of compensation for their time, then they get nothing. It is the nature of their business. If your conscious will not allow you to give them nothing, then I guess you have to do what is right for you. My only advice is: be a man and do what you feel is right, don’t let the chica dictate the situation. Be polite, be respectful, but be the one who makes the decision if she gets anything. When all is said and done be comfortable with your decision. Nothing is worse than looking back on a situation and wishing you could change something. You know yourself and you know what is right for you so follow your normal personality and stop listening to others. Their decisions are just that…theirs. If you’re actually conflicted on how to act, then God help you if you reading these posts for advice….lol. Happy New Year!!!

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Don't blame it on the booze, maybe subconsciously you just like fat women...

JJ

So.... tell the truth, if you can remember that is.... WTF are you drinking tonight? Or better yet... is it something that produces smoke? Either way, you've had enough and carried this charade to it's limit.
Time to chill my friend.... time to chill.

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Respectfully,

Muff

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So I over simplified it for the reading impared and used a cheesy analogy. The premise that holds true is that everyone is going to do what is within their nature anyway so giving advice on how to act is pointless. I recognize your attempt at humor and take no offense but from reading these posts replies like yours usually just stir up a negative rebuttal which usually leads to a whole thread of useless flaming. And for the record I was too hungover from the night before...so I was sober Maybe not rationally thinking, but sober. Peace.

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Don't blame it on the booze, maybe subconsciously you just like fat women...

JJ