www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Welcome to the #1 Source for Information on Costa Rica
It is currently Fri Jul 18, 2025 3:02 pm

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]





Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 37 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next

What is your status?
Single, never been married 39%  39%  [ 40 ]
Single, divorced once 18%  18%  [ 19 ]
Single, divorced twice or more 21%  21%  [ 22 ]
Married, first time 17%  17%  [ 17 ]
Married, one or more divorces 5%  5%  [ 5 ]
Total votes : 103
Author Message
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 24, 2006 5:33 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2004 10:24 pm
Posts: 11358
Location: Sabana Oeste , Costa Rica
Squidface wrote:
I would have to disagree with Paco. Now, I might be rationalizing to justify my behavior, but I think hanging out here and going to Costa Rica makes my marriage work. I don't mind walking across the desert to make it to the Oasis, but if no Oasis??? Marraige 365 days a year would never work for me, but 340 or so, and 25 days in Costa Rica is a great mix!
Squidface


And off course your wife has equal privileges to spend 340 days in marriage and the other 25 days at a destination of her choosing with the companions of her choosing acting as if she was single without any problems from you. Then again she might feel 300/65 is a better way for the marriage to work for her. Just because you can work at being married 340 days a year does not mean your mate has to be locked into that formula.

_________________
:D Pura Vida :D
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four
essential food groups:
alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.
Alex Levine
Image


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 24, 2006 5:47 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 02, 2003 11:23 pm
Posts: 10212
Location: Esportsmen's Lodge
Hand-Solo wrote:
I am simply comparing the number of marriages that last the institution vs divorce vs american norms.
Ok Handy you're making this up as we go along, very scientific. :lol:
That means your *Single, never been married option serves absolutely no purpose in this poll. You single guys don't waste your vote! Come back when you're married, or divorced... :P

_________________
Image
Living well is the best revenge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwUtj_YnNoY


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 24, 2006 6:08 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Sat May 29, 2004 10:22 am
Posts: 1358
corect paco ... I should have used that option for something else

good catch


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 24, 2006 7:54 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Sat Sep 27, 2003 2:34 pm
Posts: 1503
Location: Pits of Jax
YO Merciful Marriages.

My first marriage ended because graduating from Jr. High was a bit early.

My second marriage ended because my wife slept with everyone except for me.....including our two dogs.

My third marriage ended because my wife beat up on me all of the time.

My fourth marriage ended up due to it and the previous three marriages when I finally realized that all four were with trannies. A sad chapter in the Circus family.

Yea, I'm slow. Pitiful is as pitiful does.

_________________
Damn if I'm going to repeat this shit again. I need a drink.
I've been drinking vodka every day for 45 years and I have certainly never found it to be habit forming.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 9:20 am 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Sun Aug 31, 2003 9:49 pm
Posts: 1261
Location: Sabana Oeste, Costa Rica
Funny how the bad things that happen in life stick with you: Getting the shit kicked out of you by a bully, The Army, Business failures, getting audited by the IRS, getting busted for a DUI.
These are all bad things but the absoulute worst has got to be going through 2 DIVORCES!!!
It is hands down the WORST experience a man will ever have to go through in his life. And it really sticks with you.
LVSteve
PS: I fall into the 21% area and allthough I am crazy about the novia,
I WILL NEVER DO IT AGAIN!

_________________
Just an old horney, fat gambler.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 9:38 am 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2003 11:25 am
Posts: 3730
Location: Escazu, Costa Rica
After being divorced twice and now living here in CR,I am too busy having a good time to even comment on this poll,however I voted.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 10:15 am 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Fri Aug 29, 2003 12:56 am
Posts: 3985
Location: Tampa, FL
I have a "few" thoughts on this subject (NATURALLY):

1) First, this is not a scientific poll and therefore we have to be very careful about drawing too many conclusions on what it means about mongers and marriage.

2) Even if it were more scientific or did somehow accurately reflect the percentages of mongers in various states of marriage, the polling method is still flawed as it relates to marriages in general. I'm not at all surprised to see the rate of divorce and/or never married to be significantly higher among a group of mongers than it would be in the general population.

3) What conclusions can be drawn from that fact are another question. There is a saying in research called "correlation does not imply causation". In this case, that means that just because those who engage in our somewhat unusual hobby also happen to have a higher rate of non-marriage or divorce, does not mean that the former caused the latter or even the other way around that our marriage status caused us to turn to mongering. It is just as possible some other factor not measured in this poll that we all share as mongers led us both to mongering AND to our marriage status, whatever it happens to be. Perhaps is is an affinity for greater sexual adventure or greater openness to unconventional behavior? Perhaps it is because we all share a certain cynicism about marriage? Who knows?

4) That 50% of marriages that end in divorce (among the general public) statistic that one so often hears ignores another number that might give it even greater significance. How many of the other 50% that don't end in divorce are truly happy? I'm sure many are but I'm also sure many aren't what we could really call successful marriages. People stay in bad marriages for a variety of reasons. Sometimes it is "for the Ch*ldren". Sometimes it is because, they see it as simpler or more politically or socially expedient than going through the pain of divorce (e.g. the Clintons). Add in those marriages to the 50% and the odds of a marriage working out in the longterm really become heavily stacked against you.

5) Society makes it real easy to get married. In some places you don't even need a blood test and all you have to do is show up at the courthouse (or for the Elvis Impersonator at the "Chapel of Love"). Society also heavily encourages marriage as an institution. Women were taught to dream about their marriage day ever since they were little girls. OTOH, society makes it comparatively hard to get divorced. It could be argued this is a good thing since it forces couples to try to work through their problems before resorting to disolving the marriage. IMHO, society has got this formula backwards. It should be harder to get married and easier to get divorced. One reason there are so many bad marriages that end in divorce is because the couples probably should never have been married to begin with. Maybe they got married when they were too young and were still developing emotionally and then one or both parties changed. Maybe they entered into marriage too frivolously without any serious consideration of what marriage really should entail. And once a couple is married and they encounter problems they should try to deal with them first and perhaps even go for counseling before turning to divorce but, once that stage is reached and other avenues have been exhausted, it, divorce, should not be made so difficult.

6) Staying in a bad marriage for the sake of the Ch*ldren is like pulling a bandaid off slowly. K*ds know what is going on. They can feel the friction. Often times it is better to pull that bandaid off quickly in order to get the pain over with, rather than dragging it out, so that everyone can just move on.

7) In the old days when the institution of marriage was first developed, people didn't live much longer than the dozen or so years it took to raise their Ch*ldren to the point they could become self-sufficient themselves. And don't fool yourself into believing all of those dozen or so years were so happy just because they didn't countenance divorce like they do today. It is also worth pointing out that probably more men ended up "mongering" in one way or another back in those days when they were not socially allowed to publicly leave their wives. IMHO, the whole idea of finding someone you could stay in love with for you whole life is completely unrealistic for most people when your whole life often means living into your 80's and 90's as it does today.

8) Marriages as an institution are designed mainly to protect the women and to help insure that the husband will stick around and do his part to help raise their Ch*ld. Traditionally, men have been the breadwinners while women have stayed home raising their K*ds. As such, men don't need the women so much as women needed men. Even today, when this equation has largely changed in the US, divorce laws are still heavily weighted in the woman's favor. Peenuptial agreements can ameliorate much of that problem by clarifying in advance what a divorce sttlement would be in advance were that to happen, but there are some restrictions on what can be put into a prenupt and many women (wisely so from their perspective) would refuse to sign such an agreement, ostensibly because it is unromantic but also because it is clearly not in their best interest.

8) Today, IMHO, given the widespread acceptance of extramarital sex and even couples living together before or outside of marriage and given the existence of archaic divorce laws, it makes little sense and provides little or no advantage for guys to get married in the first place. True, it does act as a sign of commitment and forces couples to work on the minor difficulties that all marriages face from time to time. But, IMHO, couples don't need a legally binding document to commit to each other when both sides know that legally binding document can be broken at some later date anyway (albeit with some difficulty). Couples can also commit to each without actually getting married. They can try to work through their problems BUT, if those problems become irreconcilable, they can also walk away.

9) The only exception to my paradigm above is when it comes to having and raising K*ds. And here I'm not talking about when you accidentally knock up your girlfriend and decide to get married because of that. But, if you are PLANNING to have K*ds with a woman, that undertaking should not be entered into lightly and should be seen as a longterm commitment of at least the 18-19 years it will be before that Ch*ld goes off to college. I said in #6 that it is better to get out of bad marriage than to stay in it "for the sake of the K*ds", but it is even better yet to have a stable marriage BEFORE you decide to have the K*ds so that you're more likely to have a solid and stable background for the whole period they're growing up.

10) Finally, of greater interest to everyone here, is the question of marriage and mongering. Does mongering break-up marriages or does it provide a relief valve that makes it possible for those marriages to continue on? I can't really say for sure since I fall into the never married category myself, but I do have "few" ideas (NATURALLY). I don't think you can really generalize here. In some cases, I think mongering is a symptom of an already bad marriage. In other cases, it is merely a somewhat innocent relief valve in an otherwise basically good marriage. But you have to ask yourself if it is really all that innocent why do you have to sneak around about it. An otherwise good marriage may be seriously damaged or destroyed if or when a wife finds out her husband has been sneaking around and going with hookers behond her back. In still other cases, which seems to tend to be the accepted norm among latino couples, the husband is expected to "cheat", have mistress(es) etc. and it is more or less seen as okay as long as the wife is not confronted with it or finds out. In other words, she more or less knows or suspects that "all men are dogs", but just don't shame her by failing to be discreet. The rare case is where a guy can openly hound-dog around with his wife's knowledge or tacit approval.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 10:34 am 
Ticas ask me for advice!
User avatar

Joined: Sat Mar 25, 2006 6:52 pm
Posts: 396
Location: West Side
An interesting topic indeed! I started mongering on a European backpacking trip several years ago. I had only had 1-2 serious gf's before that, so my experience with relationships was somewhat limited. Dated quite a bit, but nothing I would call serious. After going to Europe and seeing their lighter views on sex, it really opened up my eyes. Over the next 4 years I went to Amsterdam 2-3 times a year and also to German FKK clubs. Then I met a girl and fell in love and stopped going on these mongering vacations for the most part. I still had FS at massage parlor's in SF when I was in town for 49er games. In all only 3 times did I cheat on my gf with massage parlor girls over the span of 2 years. We got engaged and were to be married next month. Then some things happened (she basically had a mental breakdown and went off the deep end) and the marriage was called off. I took it in the shorts on a lot of financial related things, but am happy to have her bipolar ass out of my life!

Could I have been faithful to her for the length of our marriage with my mongering past? I highly doubt it. I don't think I would have cheated on her with people I work with or local girls, but when on vacation I love sampling the local pu*sy! Now that mongering is in my blood, I don't know if I could just settle down and not have impulses to keep doing it.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 12:56 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Sat May 29, 2004 10:22 am
Posts: 1358
Nice comments (NATURALLY) Prolijo!

The purpose of this non-scientific poll wasnt to nail down a CRT %. I have noticed lately that when a brave fellow brother shares his/her feelings about looking for more that just depositing the next load, that he is advised that he better find a normal latina (or other). Normal being non P4P. Dont get me wrong, I dont disagree. It is just interesting as we seem collectively to knock down that sector, and my only real commentary is that if a person wants to go down that path, the first thing they should do is turn the mirror around, and look at themselves and what they want.

After a while a pu*sy is a pu*sy and a cute face grows old. If you look at tying the knot as the desire for something long term, it is best to look at your individual wnats and needs today, tomorrow and in the future.
Again without the diversity of people here, I think the site would be to homogeneous (no Paco and LH that big word didnt mean you are homos :) ) just that it is fascinating the diverse crowd we have here


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 3:38 pm 
Masters Degree in Mongering!
User avatar

Joined: Sun Jun 06, 2004 9:44 am
Posts: 919
Location: I wish I could be where there are cheap putas!
Hand-Solo wrote:
corect paco ... I should have used that option for something else
Yea, like "married but once I get out of this one, I'll never marry again" :twisted:


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 3:56 pm 
Masters Degree in Mongering!

Joined: Fri Jun 17, 2005 3:31 pm
Posts: 749
Location: Florida
k*ds would rather be from a broken home, than live in one.

RHM


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 8:55 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Wed Aug 27, 2003 11:26 am
Posts: 2593
Location: Medellin, Colombia
Prolijo said
Quote:
But, IMHO, couples don't need a legally binding document to commit to each other when both sides know that legally binding document can be broken at some later date anyway (albeit with some difficulty). Couples can also commit to each without actually getting married. They can try to work through their problems BUT, if those problems become irreconcilable, they can also walk away.


This is my new "mantra". I now have over 4 years under my belt with my wonderful, beautiful Colombiana. She was never a "working girl", which for me I credit for a lot of our success. I have much more baggage than she does. Yet...I have now lived all this time with someone who smiles morning noon and night...even on a bad day. I have been with her longer than any of my 2 exwives...and never a pressure or hint of needing to be married. SHe also had a bad marriage before, so has no urge to repeat the situation. This to me is the ideal mix of maintaining a great relationship long term, while retaining freedom and the integrity of life...not having to live a lie and stay married to someone because of "the K*ds" or to not lose my money and possessions. This to me is relational bliss...finally in my 50s :wink: ...


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 10:01 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 5:12 pm
Posts: 1675
Single, never been married:

Single, never been married 34%. That's the most significant thing I see in this poll. Makes you wonder if this little hobby is a natural state of man are a substitute chosen by those unable to attract and hold a mate.

I will console myself with the knowledge that this poll is very unscientific simply because of the disturbed nature of those participating in the poll. In short we are sick group to start with.


Lee

_________________
PS: DO NOT SEND MONEY!


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 25, 2006 11:55 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2003 11:20 am
Posts: 2698
If I had known about Costa Rica, I woulda never got married the first time


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri May 26, 2006 12:08 am 
PHD From Del Rey University!
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2004 10:24 pm
Posts: 11358
Location: Sabana Oeste , Costa Rica
Hankkh wrote:
If I had known about Costa Rica, I woulda never got married the first time


Thank goodness I didn't know about Costa Rica before my first marriage or maybe I would not have gone through with it.

Then I would have missed the joy of four Ch*ldren in my life. :D

That is worth more than anything than the bad memories or experiences will ever be able to take away.

_________________
:D Pura Vida :D
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four
essential food groups:
alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.
Alex Levine
Image


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 37 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next



All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 8 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:



Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group