www.CostaRicaTicas.com :: View topic - breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do nxt

Friends

I met the love of my life at KL 3 years back and for last 3 years she has been my companion, soulmate etc etc. she was everything I wanted from a woman in my life.

she had been pushing me for marrying for a while but I ignored and last week she gave me an ultimatum. Marry me now or I am finished with you
after lots of pushing and questioning on why the ultimatum It turns out she found another guy (tico) 2 weeks back and is now happy and in love with him.

I dropped to my knees and said marry me now and she said NO!

I need to move on

Advice I need is that will it help me to get over this woman if I come to CR for a week?
I am worried that if I come to CR then I will even miss her more and feel miserable. I really loved her

some of you have probably been in same same situation. Out of p4p for a a long time because of love and then what do you do after breakup? return to p4p? if yes after how long?

guys I really need help!!

I am from chicago area and have been visiting her for 2 - 3 weeks every other month for last 3 years

Author:	Fkpert [ Thu May 03, 2012 10:22 pm ]
Post subject:	breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do nxt
Friends I met the love of my life at KL 3 years back and for last 3 years she has been my companion, soulmate etc etc. she was everything I wanted from a woman in my life. she had been pushing me for marrying for a while but I ignored and last week she gave me an ultimatum. Marry me now or I am finished with you after lots of pushing and questioning on why the ultimatum It turns out she found another guy (tico) 2 weeks back and is now happy and in love with him. I dropped to my knees and said marry me now and she said NO! I need to move on Advice I need is that will it help me to get over this woman if I come to CR for a week? I am worried that if I come to CR then I will even miss her more and feel miserable. I really loved her some of you have probably been in same same situation. Out of p4p for a a long time because of love and then what do you do after breakup? return to p4p? if yes after how long? guys I really need help!! I am from chicago area and have been visiting her for 2 - 3 weeks every other month for last 3 years

Author:	Jawanker [ Thu May 03, 2012 11:22 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
Fkpert wrote: Friends I met the love of my life at KL 3 years back and for last 3 years she has been my companion, soulmate etc etc. she was everything I wanted from a woman in my life. she had been pushing me for marrying for a while but I ignored and last week she gave me an ultimatum. Marry me now or I am finished with you after lots of pushing and questioning on why the ultimatum It turns out she found another guy (tico) 2 weeks back and is now happy and in love with him. I dropped to my knees and said marry me now and she said NO! I need to move on Advice I need is that will it help me to get over this woman if I come to CR for a week? I am worried that if I come to CR then I will even miss her more and feel miserable. I really loved her some of you have probably been in same same situation. Out of p4p for a a long time because of love and then what do you do after breakup? return to p4p? if yes after how long? guys I really need help!! I am from chicago area and have been visiting her for 2 - 3 weeks every other month for last 3 years I'm sure this post will get lots of responses, both serious and frivolous. I really feel for you, but the tried and true answer is to find a new woman. After a brief mourning period, and I mean brief, you should seek new loves. Have fun with your freedom, and there is no better place than Costa Rica for that. Just don't rebound into a new relationship too quickly. You are a wounded deer right now and really vulnerable. The world is your apple. Wish your ex novia well and do your best to forget her. And you will.

Author:	DGD [ Thu May 03, 2012 11:34 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
Sounds like the first time this happened to you. I'd bet it's happened to a very high majority of guys to various degrees, even if only once. I think I was lucky that it happened to me when I was very young, like 15-16, because of the lesson I learned that served me well as time went by. I remember moping around the whole summer, really down. And then I met someone else. The pain went away pretty quick. The next time it happened, I knew exactly what I had to do. Maybe not as good as the ex, but remember the song about if you can't be with the one you want, love the one you're with. Same principle about when a Ch*ld loses a pet. Only one solution. It works. Nothing wrong with getting back in the saddle with a chica for openers. Only caution is realize you are on the rebound and maybe vulnerable.

Author:	Boynton [ Thu May 03, 2012 11:34 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
.

Author:	BlueDevil [ Fri May 04, 2012 12:05 am ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
Quote: Same principle about when a Ch*ld loses a pet. Only one solution. It works. At least your ex was upfront and told you the truth. Give her a kiss and hug... then wish her good luck. Don't look back. Find a new one, get over it, and move on. P4P fills a need for many guys. I would not rule it out.

www.CostaRicaTicas.com https://forum.costaricaticas.com/

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Author:	911 Driver [ Fri May 04, 2012 12:29 am ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
Dude, Move on, Next and what ever: Here ya go http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RV3G8ILSkUo Regards, 911 Driver

Author:	Chilimike [ Fri May 04, 2012 7:10 am ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
need more info to be able to comment on it....you said you met her at kl 3 years ago ....my guess she was a working girl then ,,,and has she been a working girl during the time you been dating her ? ...they never really stop ...if she stayed in san jose when you went back to the states, my guess 100% 5 mins after you got on the plane she was back working ....this situation never works out for us ....your lucky you got out like this...my guess once she sees your over her , it will be her begging you to come back. Again more info needed , were you sending her money , were you paying her rent, did you have anyone check up on her (was she working when you were in the states) list her name .and photo if you have one ....you get some answers fast. I am seeing a true 100% non worker and all the drama I put up could be a best selling book ....if she ever turns into a working girl , I will drop her like a hat, the running pu*sy meter is just to much for me to put up with, her friends are all true non workers and they look down on working girls ....she hates it if I stay in the sportmens .....but I like the place .....

Author:	Santas Bro [ Fri May 04, 2012 8:16 am ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
IMO, some good advice from others........... From reading your words you are hurting badly right now. This pain is very real to you. There is a space in your body where you can feel this pain, possibly your heart? The power of this feeling is overwhelming right now, and it seems constant. Obviously not a good space for you. Identify where in your body this feeling lies. Does it have a shape, a color? Identify it as much as possible. Until you can understand that this feeling can be your friend, it will be your enemy. How can it possibly be good? The sooner that you realize that you are feeding this feeling, the sooner you can change that thought to a positive about self. It must be used to tell you where you choose not to be. If you are not thinking the highest thought for self, the sooner you realize that, and change that thought, the sooner you will be on the road to being who you choose to be. You are only one thought away from being whatever you choose. At the moment due to the hurt, you may feel "less than who you really are". Do not let yourself dwell there, it does not serve you in any way. Right now there are many if, could, should, would thoughts traveling through your mind. That is the past, and cannot be undone, but it can serve you instead of hurting you. Honor this lady with the thoughts of the good times that you had, and how she has made you a better person, instead of the negatives about what could have been. You may want to do some mirror work. This is one of the hardest things for me. Do not just see your reflection in the mirror, but look into your soul through your eyes. You will be able to "see" who you really are. From the words you have written you seem to be a good, but wounded man. Time will heal this, but your actions can make the process much shorter. It could be in seconds if you choose that route. Which man do you choose to be today? Make it the stronger, powerful, man that you can be. You are only one thought away from being that man. You are at a fork in the road of life, choose the positive direction, and not the "less than" direction. I wish you much luck on your journey. It is a road that has many pot holes. Health & happiness to you.............

Author:	Capitan1962 [ Fri May 04, 2012 8:49 am ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
She did you a favor. Keywords were Key Largo. If you met her there she was there for one reason. Once a girl has committed herself to sell her body she forms a barrier between herself and the person on the other side of that barrier. Less than 1% of these relationships ever work out. Sure there are some that have actually married these girls and stayed married. And these marriages are about as healthy as a strong case of Malaria. Go bang yourself silly and enjoy the good life again. Have fun with that money you were going to give her.

Author:	Rac [ Fri May 04, 2012 9:29 am ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
In case you're doing a head-count, I agree with most of what the brothers above have said. I can only add that you should see Karen at HLH. She'll cure your sadness really fast. RAC

Author:	Fkpert [ Fri May 04, 2012 4:16 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
Thanks friends. This was my first love. I only realized the love for her after she broke up with me. A big lesson for me and guys who are in a relation. DO NOT be in a relationship if you do not see a future. Call it quits sooner then later to avoid pain and misery. I am lucky I did not get her pregnant and have no other legal issues. I met her at KL on my 2nd trip to CR. I was going through divorce and she saved me from the pain of divorce. I did not go through any post divorce issues.She was 18 at the time and I was 36 one of the prettiest girls I have been with in my life. She quit KL after a month of me seeing her.I know this for sure because of the way she lived and spoke. We spoke for hours every day for last 3 years. Not a single day went without spending atleast 3 - 4 hours talking. we did break up 3 - 4 times during are time together because of me being an idiot and trying to call it quits. She still managed to bring me back every single time. I stayed with her at her apartment after 1 yr of our relationship. We would go to church, visit family friends and every one new we were novios. She was under pressure to get married and I wanted but my gut feeling said NO. I never thought breaking up with her will be so difficult. I have been crying since the breakup, cannot sleep, cannot eat, taking sick days at work etc etc. I cannot even thing of doing anything sexual at this point as it reminds me of her and it is just painful I was paying for her apartment and few other things but did not pay for time spent with her at all. She was 100% into me, did everything I needed. I got so use to it that I let her control my feelings(big mistake) I had no idea what I was getting into as this was my first love. My marriage was an arranged marriage and I never connected to my ex emotionally

Author:	Thirdworld [ Fri May 04, 2012 4:30 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
Good luck to you in the future. I don't think you should come back to CR anytime soon, because you seem very vulnerable to being snagged again.

Author:	SpeakNo [ Fri May 04, 2012 5:10 pm ]
Post subject:	breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do nxt
Arranged marriage?

Author:	VinceThePrince [ Fri May 04, 2012 5:27 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: breakup with novia for 3 years. Please advice what to do
Fkpert, Take some time to focus on yourself, your family, friends, career, hobbies. I wouldn't go back to CR until you are all healed up. Vince

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