Fred went to the doctor and said, "Doctor, I've got a problem, but if you're going to treat it, first you've got to promise not to laugh."
"Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient." "Okay then," Fred said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor has ever seen. It couldn't have been the size of a peanut. Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure. "I'm so sorry Fred,"said the doctor.
"I really am....I don't know what came over me. On my honour as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?"
"It's swollen," Fred replied.
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Respectfully,
Muff

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