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A Politically Correct Greeting
https://forum.costaricaticas.com/viewtopic.php?f=16&t=9427
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Author:  Irish Drifter [ Tue Dec 20, 2005 1:16 pm ]
Post subject:  A Politically Correct Greeting

Dear All,

I wanted to send out some sort of holiday greeting to my friends, but it is
so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending
someone. So I met with my attorney today, and on his advice (and after $399
in attorney's fees) I wish to say the following:

Please accept with no obligation implied or implicit, my best wishes for an
environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, nonaddictive,
gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday practiced within
the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion or secular
practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions
and/or traditions of others or their choice not to practice religious or
secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically
uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar
year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other
cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great (not
to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is
the only "America" in the western hemisphere) and without regard to the race,
creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of
the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:
This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely
transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no
promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for
her/himself or others and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable
at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as
expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one
year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting whichever comes
first and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a
new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher...

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