An Irish boy says in confession, "Bless me Father, for I have sinned.
I have been with a loose woman."
The priest asks, "Is that you, Timmy Shaughnessy?"
"Yes, Father, it is."
"And, who was the woman you were with?"
"I can't be tellin' you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."
"Well, Timmy, I'm sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as well
tell me now. Was it Brenda O'Malley?"
"I cannot say," Timmy replied.
"Was it Patricia Kelly?"
"I'll never tell."
"Was it Sheilah O'Brien?"
"I'm sorry, Father, but I cannot name her."
"Was it Kathleen Morgan?"
"My lips are sealed."
"Was it Fiona Grogan, then?"
"Please, Father, I cannot tell you."
The priest sighs in frustration. "You're a steadfast lad, Timmy
Shaughnessy, and I admire that. But you've sinned, and you must atone.
You cannot attend church Mass for three months. Be off with you now."
Timmy walks back to his pew. His friend, Sean, slides over and
whispers, "What'd you get?"
Timmy replies, "A three month vacation and five good leads."
_________________ A Costa Rica Toast:
Here's to Looking like Movie Stars, Partying like Rock Stars and phucking like PORN STARS!
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