www.CostaRicaTicas.com

1. My mother taught me
TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .


"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.
I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.

"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock
you into the middle of next week!"

4. My father taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC ...
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,
you're not going to the shops with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case
you're in an accident."

7. My father taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying,
and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times.
Don't exaggerate!"

13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about
BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate Ch*ldren in
this world, who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it from your father
when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes,
they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know
when you are cold?"

20. My father taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes,
don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me
HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you.
Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand.

25. My father taught me about JUSTICE .
"One day you'll have K*ds,
and I hope they turn out just like you !"


This was only sent to the over 50 crowd, because the younger ones would not believe we truly were told these "EXACT" words by our parents.

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Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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"If you dont think women are explosive,....drop one."

Speakno this is a joke. I guess it`s a hard one for you to understand . Sorry, I won`t be posting any more jokes as I can see they may be over your head.

A fun Post in just the right place. Thanks and keep posting--you are appreciated.

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"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED

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"If you dont think women are explosive,....drop one."

You seem anally-fixated , even tracking another male Member of this Board. What are we to make of this? Especially in context of lame-o wheezing retort about me praising someone. Nattering Nabob of Negativity writ large? "What are we to make of this?" remains the 800 lb. gorilla...
I don't expect you'll understand one word of this.

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"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED

Best thing I ever learned was from my friend John back in 8th grade - I've posted his wisdom before, but......

"He said " Never marry a whore - in 6 months she will get tired of your ugly c.o.c.k. and be out phucking other guys"

While I'm kidding a little - Its a lesson some on this board have learned the hard way