Grabbed these last night:
1) How long a minute is depends on which side of the toilet door you are.
2) You don't need a parachute to skydive...you need one to skydive twice.
3) I intend to live forever...so far, so good.
4) I used to be indecisive. These days I'm not so sure...
5) I had amnesia once...maybe twice.
6) Never go to bed angry...stay up and plot your revenge.
7) Is Marx's tomb a Comunist plot?

Letting the cat out of the bag ...is a whole lot easier than putting it back in.
9) There are 2 rules to success: (1) Don't tell everything you know