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With deep apologies to a certain Brother, I proffer this LA Confidential-era jape:
The LAPD, the FBI and the CIA are all trying to prove they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and members of each agency have to try to catch it.
The CIA go into the forest. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigation, they conclude that rabbits do not exist.

The FBI go in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbits and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.

The LAPD go in. They come out just two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling, "Okay, okay, I'm a rabbit, I'm a rabbit."

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"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED