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An Irish Daughter had not been home for over 5 years.
Upon her return, her father cussed her, "Where have ye been all this time?
Why did ye not write to us, not even a line?
Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum through?"
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff .... dad .... I became a prostitute ...."
"Ye what??!! Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family."
"OK, dad .... as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten-bedroom mansion, plus a savings certificate for $5 million.
For me little brother, this gold Rolex.
And for ye, daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside, plus a membership in the country club..." ... (takes a breath) ... "and an invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board me new yacht in the Riviera, and ...."
"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says dad.
Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff .... a prostitute, dad! .... sniff, sniff."
"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant. Come here and give yer old man a hug!"
_________________  Pura Vida Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. Alex Levine 
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