www.CostaRicaTicas.com

It's not 'what' you say, it's how you say it...I guess...??

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America , Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as "HILLBILLIES."

You must now refer to them as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.
And furthermore


HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."


2. She is not "EASY" - She is " HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

5. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE.

6. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

5. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE.

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Pura Vida
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four
essential food groups:
alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.
Alex Levine

Now that's funny, I don't care who you are

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Cigar smoking doesn’t reduce us, it elevates us; It makes us more content to be alone, or it helps us to enjoy our companions. It encourages us to dwell on the simple moments and celebrate the sublime.
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Hung like Einstein and smart as a mule.
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You're not drunk if you can lay on the floor without holding on.

Don't know where ya got yur im4ation butt we r proud to be called Hillbillies. Just don't call us hicks, hoosiers are hicks.

Green Acres are the place fer me
Farm Animals can be yur best buddies,
moo, crow, bleat or oink
you can screw um all
cus they never tell.

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Shamas O'Dognasty
Gourmet Catering & Septic Tank Cleaning