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lights On......Oops
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Author:  Irish Drifter [ Sun Oct 01, 2006 4:12 pm ]
Post subject:  lights On......Oops

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time
they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the
light.

Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she
would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were
in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the
lights. She looked down. and saw her husband was holding a
battery-operated leisure device... a vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a
real one.

She went completely ballistic. "You impotent bastard," She screamed at
him, "how could you be lying to me all of these years? You better
explain yourself!"

The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly:
"I'll explain the toy . . . you explain the K*ds."

Author:  ChiTownGino [ Sun Oct 01, 2006 5:23 pm ]
Post subject: 

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"

"None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away."

"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking."

Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?"

"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone."

"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking."

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