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COMMON SENSE OBITUARY
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such
valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not Ch*ldren, are in
charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with
sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly
student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job which they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly Ch*ldren. It declined
even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Tylenol, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student; but could not inform
the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their
victims.
Common Sense took a beating when a person couldn't defend himself from a burglar in his own home and the burglar can sue for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and
was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived
by three stepbrothers: I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm A Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
_________________
Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.
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