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 Post subject: The "S" Word
PostPosted: Wed Jul 12, 2006 12:28 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!

Joined: Wed Oct 06, 2004 10:04 pm
Posts: 2667
The "S" Word

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd
better have a good hand."
Woody Allen

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday
night."
Rodney Dangerfield

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."
Lynn Lavner

"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
Camille Paglia

"Sex is one of the nine reasons for incarnation. The other eight are
unimportant."
George Burns

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole
relationship."
Sharon Stone

"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf
is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."
Tiger Woods

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
Jack Nicholson

" Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."

Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a sense
of humor )

"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals
through his wallet."
Robin Williams

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
Billy Crystal

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."

Robert De Niro

"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are
having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling.
So what's the problem?"
Dustin Hoffman

"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know
what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked'."

Jerry Seinfeld

"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough
blood to run one at a time."

Robin Williams

"It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom."
Joan Rivers

"Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money
can buy."
Steve Martin

" You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little
things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay
good money for in later life."
Elmo Phillips

" Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
Oscar Wilde

" It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married."
George burns[/b]

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Spunk glazed Chicas are the building blocks of the universe!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jul 12, 2006 5:49 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
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Joined: Fri Apr 30, 2004 10:50 am
Posts: 1038
"God rest the souls of that poor family... and pu*sy's half price for the next 15 minutes".

Al Swearengen
Deadwood

I wonder if that would ever happen at the BM. :?


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 Post subject: Re: The "S" Word
PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 10:10 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
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Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2008 5:57 pm
Posts: 9518
Location: NFM--Geezers, cowpokes and the working poor--yeeha!
every one a gem.

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"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED


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 Post subject: Re: The "S" Word
PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 11:07 pm 
Masters Degree in Mongering!
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Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2011 10:20 pm
Posts: 858
Location: minne snow ta
priceless...just priceless

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When I was born, I was given a choice - a big pecker or a good memory.... I don't remember what I chose.


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 Post subject: Re:
PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 11:42 pm 
PHD From Del Rey University!
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Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2008 5:57 pm
Posts: 9518
Location: NFM--Geezers, cowpokes and the working poor--yeeha!
Latinoheat69 wrote:
"God rest the souls of that poor family... and pu*sy's half price for the next 15 minutes".

Al Swearengen
Deadwood

I wonder if that would ever happen at the BM. :?

No but there's a dude recently departed who was working towards it at another venue.
BTW, I'm only bringing forward the extended Posts--there's a ton of good jokes from this era (Search "Irish Drifter" and "Shamas"--wicked funny stuff). Amuse the guys at your next 10 poker sessions.

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"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED


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 Post subject: Re: The "S" Word
PostPosted: Sat Aug 04, 2012 5:25 pm 
Ticas ask me for advice!
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Joined: Fri Feb 06, 2009 9:35 pm
Posts: 347
Location: The Y
Good stuff... Thx

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