www.CostaRicaTicas.com

A band will often have the drummer give a solo. When that solo stops, it seems customary that the bass player will give a solo. Get it?

I “get it” now, Thanks for helping out a non musical brother.

Can’t say I find it terribly funny even after the explanation, but again never played a musical instrument, never went to band camp. And never really noticed a bass solo in any show I have seen.

Guess this one just wasn’t for me.

Don’t take any offense to my naiveté to all you drummers out there. I luv ya all !!!

GS, it is different strokes for different folks.

For some reason, this joke cracks me up, even when I think about it. Maybe I have a strange sense of humor.

You are most assuredly not alone. My brother a R&R drummer just fell out after reading.

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"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED

A man died and his wife phoned the newspaper to place an obituary. She called the obituary department and said, "This is what I want to print: Bernie Levin is dead." The man at the newspaper said, "But for $25 you are allowed to print six words." The woman answered, "OK. Then print: Bernie Levin dead. Toyota for sale."

One day the teacher walked to the back of the room where Johnny was, and he had his hand down his pants.
The Teacher asked, "Johnny, what are you doing?"

Then, Johnny said, "It hurts down there."
"Well then, you need to go to the nurse and see if you can go home", said the teacher.

A little while later, Johnny came back to classroom and sat back down.
Then the teacher came to the back of the room again, and he had his dick hanging out of his pants.

The teacher said, "Johnny, what's that doing hanging out of your pants?!"
Then Johnny said, "My mom said if I can stick it out until noon, she'll come and pick me up."

A surgeon went to check on his patient after her operation. She was awake, so he examined her, then said, "You'll be fine."



She asked, "How long will it be before I'm able to have a normal sex life again, doctor?"



The surgeon seemed to pause, which alarmed the girl. She said, "What's the matter, Doctor? I will be all right, won't I?"



The Doctor replied, "Yes, you'll be fine. It's just that no one has ever asked me that after having their tonsils out."

I thought the wife would be the ideal candidate for a new TV game show.
Turns out I got it all wrong, the program's called Fact Hunt.

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Living well is the best revenge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwUtj_YnNoY

Yo Mama's glasses so thick that when looks at a map she can see people walking.

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Go Dolphins!!!

An Irish boy stands crying at the side of the road. A man asks What is wrong?
The boy says, “Me ma is dead.”
“Oh bejaysus,”the man says. “Do you want me to call Father O' Riley for you?”
The boy replies, “No tanks mister.” Sex is the last ting on me mind at the moment.”

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* These are the "Good Ole Days". Enjoy Them.

* RENT but, "Don't Buy a Home in Costa Rica" until you have lived here for THREE years.

Great joke!

Dating: The process of spending enormous amounts of money, time and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don't especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future. For women: trying to find a rich prince, to marry, and have Ch*ldren. For men: trying to have sex.

Divorce: 1) future tense of marriage. 2) Postgraduate in school of love. 3) An extra difficult time at the end of a couple’s married life where they are forced to deal with bad feelings, bad lawyers, and everyone wanting more money. 4) America's great contribution to marriage. Edward Fawcett

Divorce lawyer: a lawyer whose primary responsibility is to make sure you get half and he gets the other half.

Exercise: For women: to walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase. For men: desperate physical exertion to increase the chances for sex.

Family planning: the art of spacing your Ch*ldren the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.

Impotence: Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings"

Impregnable: a woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

Indifference: A woman's feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the man to be "playing hard to get".

Kissing: a means of getting two people so close together that they can't see anything wrong with each other. Works the opposite way between teenagers and parents.

Lipstick: Non-sticking coloring for the lips to enhance the beauty of your mouth. Found on his collar, mouth coloring only a tramp would wear

Love: 1) Temporary insanity curable by marriage. Ambrose Bierce. 2) A feeling dogs can show by wagging their tail. If lucky, a human will feed them in return. 3) Friendship set on fire 4) The irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.

Marriage: 1) a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution? 2) The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two. Ambrose Bierce 3) The process of finding out what type of person your spouse would prefer. 4) Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. 5) Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

Men: 1) the male of the human race is commonly known (to the female) as Mere Man. The genus has two varieties: good providers and bad providers. Ambrose Bierce 2) a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained by women to do most things.

Nymphomaniac: A man's term for a woman who wants to have sex more often than he does.

Panties: The last defense on the front lines of desire.

Quiet: a state of household serenity which occurs before the birth of the first Ch*ld and occurs again after the last Ch*ld has left for college.

Sex: 1) activity of a mouse to become mice. 2) activity of men to cause happiness, and of women to cause child-labor

Women: the only oppressed group in society that lives in intimate association with their opressors.

My new girlfriend said I have to wait six months before she'll suck my d1ck.

I told her I totally understand and respect her decision and that I'd give her a call then.

Dear Abby,
I was watching from my bedroom window while my neighbor's wife was sunbathing topless.
As I was jerking off, I turned to notice my wife just standing there with hands on her hips watching me....
Is she a pervert?

Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car which said: Two Prostitutes - $50.00.

A policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they'd either have to remove the sign or go to jail.

Just at that time, another car passed with a sign saying: 'JESUS SAVES.'

One of the girls asked the officer, 'How come you don't stop them?!' 'Well, that's a little different,' the officer smiled, 'Their sign pertains to religion.

The following day the same police officer noticed the same two hookers driving around with a large sign on their car. He figured he had an easy arrest until he read their new sign:

Two Fallen Angels
Seeking Peter --$50

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Why settle for just one woman when you can enjoy them all?