www.CostaRicaTicas.com

I was walking downtown today, and passed the Balmoral and noticed that their brand new restaurant open air Veranda was open.. Did not have an opportunity to partake in some lunch and a review, but it is enormous, and very well designed... Looks good, but only food and service will make this place like anywhere else. Will do a review when I get a chance.

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Looking forward to seeing it in January. It was still in the early stages of construction last June/July, but from what I could see taking shape, I was impressed.

Zebra

El Patio: Hotel Balmoral Veranda Restaurant & Bar.

Dinner / Breakfast review:

First off let me say it might truly be unfair to review this place the first day it was open for dinner & the second day it was an open for breakfast, but I also would be negligent in my duties, if I did not report the facts as they are today.

Thursday December 14th, saw this was open so I picked up the ball & chain (God I hate that Bitch), and headed to the new El Patio restaurant which is located on Avenida Central diagonally across from the news Café. Upon arriving, they have a matrie d standing there, but I don’t believe he has any responsibilities as he was like a big mute standing there. When I inquired to if I may have a table near the street, he simply pointed me towards the direction of the waiters station. There were many old faces working there most prominently news café personal that has changed over. I then inquired to one of the staff how about that table by the window and was given sure let us clean it for you. I indicated I would head to the bar to enjoy a drink while they cleaned up a prime table.

Let me begin to describe this place now. By far there is nothing like it in my memory in SJO. It is absolutely drop dead the most gorgeous laid out place you have ever seen. Large comfortable chairs & tables, a good view of Central, with security present so you are not hounded by beggars etc on the window tables. The place is enormous with two floors a private dining and party area along with a deep lower level with all types of table’s booths etc. The Wood columns, glass fixtures and the overall décor are simply magnificent. Unfortunately that is where the accolades end and the real story begins.

Well, after viewing their selection at the bar, they had very limited types of alcohol. I mean just poor bottom basement brands. We waited 10 minutes to have the female bartender come over to take our order & then when my wife asked for a Margarita she disappeared for another 10 minutes to find limes and Margarita mix. All the while not one person had cleaned not only the table we were waiting for but none of the dirty tables anywhere near the window. I watched a measured shot of the bottom basement tequila being used for the drink and I settled for a good old Imperial, can’t screw that up right? Wrong WARM and I’m not an I drink Ice with my beer sorta guy. Ok enough bitching, 29 minutes later with several requests we finally were seated glad they only had 75 open tables imagine what the wait would have been. Interesting my wife invited one of her friends but didn’t tell me, and she showed up just before we sat.

Menu is extremely diverse mix of Appetizers, salads, meats, fishes, pizzas, pastas, pretty much soup to nuts. I inquired for a wine list, they had none. I asked for a list of wines by the glass, nope sorry. OK what do you have? Let me check! Ok 10 minutes ok are you ready to order, what types of wines, oh sorry I forgot… be right back.. If it wasn’t so sad it would be comical.

I’ll skip the bashing the waiters now to move towards what was ordered 3 simple dishes in my humble opinion. First my wife’s friend ordered a personal special pizza with various fish on it. Certainly I don’t know why on earth anyone would do that, but she did. I stuck with simple Lomito with mushroom sauce, and the bitch oh sorry wife, ordered Lasagna. Well if you thought the wait for the table was bad you should try dinner. 27 minutes before food showed with the waiter no where in site, no wines ever produced, and jeez if I was dying of thirst. Just brutal.

OK here comes the food. The personal pizza looked good but, they had Scungilli and muscles on the pizza. If that wasn’t bad enough the muscles shells where there as well, what a site the muscles shells cooked directly into the pizza. I tasted just the tomatoes sauce, cheese & Crust area and let us just say, Pizza hut has nothing to worry about and Pizza hut in my opinion is one step up from dog food. It was not very good.

The lomito appeared to be a decent piece of meat, though after 29 minutes you would have thought the term medium meant they had time to cook it. I didn’t know they served Carpaccio that thick. It was barely raw, and the sauce was well lacking in any characteristic of any kind other than it was brown.

The Lasagna… OH BOY, It was the best meal on the table, and it was on a scale of 1 -10 a 1. Lasagna paste noodles layers on top of what is supposed to be meat & cheese of some substance & magnitude though it has neither, in fact where the hell was any cheese at all. The sauce was straight canned tomatoes sauce barely cooked. All and all it was a real trifecta of bad food.

I’ll skip the non desert tray, no waiter in sight for coffee etc, simply another wait of what seemed like an eternity to pay the rather modest check, but the food was simply awful and the service or lack thereof was non existent. On the GOURMET scale of 1-10 this one does not rate.

Let me make matters worse by having to meet a friend of mine staying at the Presidente for breakfast, and asked to eat guess where the new El Patio. OH BROHTER. I tried like heck to talk him out of it, but NO he wants to eat there. Off we go this AM. It’s a standard buffet breakfast but with little to no selections.

Fruit at 10:15 looked like it was there since 6AM
Gallo Pino & Plantains the same
Only OJ no other juices
Cold pancakes in the tray
Omelet lady but only tomatoes, cheese and onions to choose from.
Some mix and match toast, and some cold Croissants and pastry.
After sitting down not once did I ever have a waiter come over to ask if we wanted something other than OJ, or to refill my coffee cup. Only time I ever saw him was for the check which the Breakfast buffet is 2900.00 each. OUCH and simply stated skip it next time.

As previously stated this is very unfair with them only being open 2 days and I can excuse even all the bad service as they were very busy and highly untrained and understaffed for the traffic they encountered on this busy weekend. I am as forgiving as the next guy, but one thing you can’t forgive is some food, that was as bad as anything I’ve eaten in SJO. It is a dam shame and I sincerely hope they get their act together as I am quite sure if they did this place could be an absolute gold mine and wonderful destination unlike anything else in the downtown area.

Till next time!

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...............Well, at least the place looks nice.

Thanks for the honest review CRT Gourmet. I usually like to try out new places in the gulch and having one friend in town now and another one due in next month most likely would have given the "El Patio" a try. Will wait before doing that.

When Hartley left the News Café the dreaded " word on the street" was that he was going to be managing the new restaurant at the Balmoral. This definitely does not sound like the type of an operation Hartley would be running.

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Pura Vida
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four
essential food groups:
alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.
Alex Levine

Looks and sounds like a great place to have a morning cup of coffee and watch the chicas go by,so long as you don't have to eat anything. I recommend the patio at the Grand for some breakfast first then the El Patio.

I agree that the place "looks" fantastic walking by as I did yesterday.

El Patio update-
An amigo and I tried El Patio for dinner tonight, I was leary after the recent review by CRT Gourmet but we were pleasantly surprised. Dinner was much better and cheaper than what I had at the News Café the night before. The place has been doing quite well from what I've observed and was busy so we waited about 10 minutes for a table by the street to open up and had our drinks and orders taken within 10 minutes and food served in another 10-15, not bad considering the place was full. I ordered the chicken lasagna (which News Café no longer serves) it was good and served with a delicious greek type salad topped with bacon and my amigo had a burger & fries which he said was very good and the best burger around for only 1750 colones. They seem to have gotten their act together and the prices are quite reasonable from what I saw, will definitely be back!

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Living well is the best revenge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwUtj_YnNoY

Tonight's review-
Food - GOOD
Service - BAD
Gee the place was only half full and service was terrible, the waiters walked around a lot and talk to each other but pay NO attention to their tables. Anyway my pollo sandwich (another thing News Cafe took off the menu) and fries were good along with orange custard for dessert. Yum.

Thanks for all the reviews.........I'll be sure to check it out next month.

CRTG,

Thanks for the review, and also thanks to Paco for update.

Wouldn't it be nice if we could translate the reviews and copy them to the manager of El Patio? It might not do any good, but one never knows.

It seems that service (never big on the tico list of priorities) is the cause of most of the suffering here. The kitchen is going through birthing pains, but as many of the staff are returning veterans, there seems to be little excuse for the poor service.

The prices seem very reasonable though... but crap food and service are never good bargains, regardless of price.

Isn't the price quoted by Paco for burger/fries the same as at the New York Bar? And hell, at least the NYB has Heinz ketchup.

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Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

Last time I had a cheeseburger at the NYB it was still 1300 colones. One of the biggest bargains in a gringo establishment in the gulch.

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Pura Vida
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four
essential food groups:
alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.
Alex Levine

Guess my amigo was comparing the burger to the HDR (3850k) and News Cafe (2900k) and I had the burger at NYB a couple trips back and was not impressed. 2 guys at the next table last night got the burger at El Patio and it is large and topped with everything including guacomole, one guy couldn't even eat it all. I don't eat much carne but have to give it a try hoy.
Hey ID I saw your rooftop from a condo in torre 4 ayer, would have thrown a rock over to wake you up but didn't have one.

Edit:
Since I was suffering from protien depletion I passed on the burger today and opted for the sopa de pollo for lunch, pretty good-similar to News cafe served with rice & bread and basically they toss in a 1/4 chicken breast (bones and all). For dessert they were out of the strawberry mousse so it was strawberry cheesecake, a huge piece I couldn't finish it, easily twice what you get in the states. I usually don't eat dessert but most are only 750-900 colones so why not..
And the service today- exceptional, they must be reading CRT, I had my food 2 minutes after ordering.
Someone mentioned this place may hurt the News' Cafes business but it seems there are plenty of tourists for both places, not like the NC is empty or anything, on the other hand El Patio has drawn me away.

Edit Edit:
Won a few bucks on the slots at HDR so it's dinner at (where else) El Patio tonight on the DelReys money. Was going to get the burger but a pizza at the next table smelled great so I ordered the Tuscana-comes w/ pepperoni, ham and mushrooms. Under 10 minutes here comes my "personal" size pizza, take note although thin crust this is no snack, roughly 14 inches, 8 slices. With a coke total 2700 colones and was pretty good. When paying at the back I asked the manager what was up on the 2nd floor, he insisted I go up and take a look (they must know I'm writing about them) and he told me the upstairs would be open Thu. 12/28 The have a large bar up there with seating along the streetside, restrooms, a patio off to each side extending out towards the street and quite a few more tables for dining.
Well enough already I'm hooked and really enjoying the place- good food, outstanding atmosphere, great prices and hit or miss service what more can you ask for in the gulch?
I just hope they don't jack up the prices when they start doing well.

I'm sure that the beautiful bar upstairs won't cater to mongers and chicas.The Balmoral Hotel is very anti-working chica. It's a shame because the Gultch could certainly use a new place for everyone to hang out.

OKAY Paco, you convinced me to give this place another try, as perhaps my expectations were a bit to much for the 1st day... So Saturday evening we headed over there to give it another ride.

Downtown was packed again, I've got so much confetti in my hair it looks like I've got dandruff...I'll give you the short and sweet of it.

Two dishes ordered boneless chicken breast with a wine sauce 1-10 an 9 it was very good, but the fries were ice cold with it. Wife (GOD I HATE THAT BITCH), at the recomendation of our waiter Roy formerly of the News Cafe she ordered the Churasco Steak. Scale of 1-10 3 tasteless, piece of meat, Sorry Call it as I see em. I'm sure I should stick to the basics as a salad went by me that looked excellent big & fresh... and the Burgers going bye looked good too, but that was what was ordered.

Service was better but still in the weeds overall, and waiting at the bar for a street side table when tabbing out, the Bartender has no cash bar WTF, she has to send the money out to the waiters to cash, I've personally never heard of something that stupid in my life..

Better and the place has potential, I'll say this, the upstairs is gorgeous and will be open to the public....

Happy Holidays!

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I know it's not very smart to post anything contrary to VB's point of view......... but......... I heard from several sources that the new owners of Balmoral intentions are to target and market to the Del Rey crowd. Word is the new casino on the second floor will not only be chica friendly but will actually cater to them.

Time will tell.