www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Papucho calls. He's a 72 year-old monger with more experience under his belt than I have years...almost. His call: "I'm heading down for a quick one. Staying at the Amistad. You in?"
Well, it is true, I did just turn 60 on the 4th of July. I haven't been to Costa Rica since January of 2016. A former working girl friend of mine is trying to recover from cancer, so I'd like to visit her (she's promised a unique BBBJCIM with her post-chemotherapy bald dome. That would be a first.

So...without much further consideration, I bought my ticket ($626.00), reserved a great room at the SL and bought my usual trip insurance. I then carefully packed up the BDSM gear, glass dildos, sex sling, Pilgrim stocks, Cat O' Numerous Tails, 1.4kilos of Cialis, one rubber C*ck ring, 3 styles of lubricant, 4 dozen preservativos and the infamous Rabo-Robot (TM) and am ready to go.

Any ideas on what I should tell the wife? I look forward to seeing old friends and meeting many new ones. Keep an eye out for the blind guy with light brown hippie hair. I'll be the one with the she-eating grin.

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Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

Tell her it's a fishing trip for pink snapper. Good to see you are back, EC.

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" Omit no happy hour that may give furtherance to our expedition."

Tell the wife you and your buddies are going on a fishing trip. Go downtown, they have everything in the universe in those small shops. Eventually you will find a shop you can buy fishing poles. Buy the cheapest one that's still big. Off of Av 1 there are several fish markets, freshly caught fish. Go into one and request a manager, they usually at least speak some English.

Pay the manager to let you hold up some of the bigger fish with the fishing pole by your side and get your buddies to take dozens of pictures, do several "selfies", rotate your buddies doing the same....Give him the fishing pole and thank him, this will confirm in the mind of another Tico that Americans are stark raving mad.

Keep sending her the pics and tell her you're having a great time but eating so much fish you're getting sick of it. While in Costa Rica, eat tons of fresh caught fish, at least twice a day. Tico sodas everywhere have it, it's delicious, reasonable and good for you. The Sea Bass here is fantastic, plus it's energy food and you're going to need that. When you get home and she tests you to be sure, she'll see you get sick of it when she puts it on your plate...

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Don't try to understand 'em, just rope 'em down and brand 'em...

Have a great safe trip, it will be next year before I can afford ten days again, five trips in six months can do that, I learned Jaco is not for me in the rainy season, but you can bring the Jaco chicas to SJ if you got the #. Then they can work the DR .

Some will not be seen there or refuse to even go to a room there.

Netgems..........

Your advice is kinda complicated. It's a lot easier to have someone simply PHOTOSHOP you on a fishing boat - - - or anywhere else you "need" to be.

But it's not as devious and not as much fun, and you need to practice and stay on your toes if you're a married monger, you need to be able to pivot when it's time to pivot, and slither when it's time to slither...besides, people deaf dumb and blind can tell photoshop these days...

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Don't try to understand 'em, just rope 'em down and brand 'em...

take a couple of different shirts so it looks like you are changing clothes each day, maybe a different hat

Now here's a PRO.... married mongers, keep in touch with him!!! Also take pics every time eating fish, keep sending them everyday, first couple days big grin, last couple days...not so much...

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Don't try to understand 'em, just rope 'em down and brand 'em...

You guys crack me up! 1. My wife is blind and can't see photos, devious or otherwise. 2. Wife knows all about C.R. (we spent our last night of a 2016 C.R. trip in the Sportsmen's) 3. The "how do I tell the wife" thing was a joke. 4. She helps me pack...sex toys etc. included and worries like hell about me while I'm gone.

So... great ideas all, but guess what? I take horrible selfies. I often accidentally photograph my p*cha...

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Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

El C.....
You have a GREAT wife. They should all be so wise.