My story, critique and comments

JerseyGringo · **Posted:** Sat Jul 11, 2009 12:13 am

Captain Cohiba wrote:

Patriot,

I have read many of your well documented trials & tribulations of loving a puta. You seem like a nice a guy who treats a lady in a chivalrous manner......You also have many CRT friends...and I'm sure countless others.........

BUT.....

For your own good, someone needs to be a friend, it is time to give you a kick in the ass, and wake you up, you need to stop being such a pu*sy and get some balls. You asked for critique and I know that you are thinned skinned and defensive....but buck up, this will help........

Yes, your chica was a puta....I don't care if you call her full time, part time, pro or semi pro, they are putas, and putas are whores. That does not mean we should not treat them well, it just means know who you are in bed with. Once they have taken money for sex, they have crossed the line and they will do it again and again and again. Yes, there are exceptions, but they are few. And your chances of finding that one who will stop and be with only you are diminished since you don't live there and can't be with her all the time.

You seem to have a real problem finding any self worth in yourself. I have read your statements where you ponder why such a "woman would be with you." This shows a real lack of self confidence. Find that one thing you are great at(everyone has one), magnify by a 100x and expand on it. Walk around like you are a phucking rock star. Go to a bar and turn down women. Walk in your local bookstore like you are Brad Pitt. Go up to the hottest chick in Starbucks and say something completely off the wall and not even care about her response. Stop objectifying them so much. You wrote "I put them up on a pedestal." Get counseling even. Or a dating coach. You are in a cycle where you will keep getting walked on until you get comfortable with yourself and get some self confidence. Women just don't respect a man that just drivels all over them. Maybe a down trodden gringa might, but do you want that baggage? Women want you to be their experience, they don't want to be the experience. You have to act like you are the best thing going and you can care less if she walks. You have to act like wherever you are is the coolest place to be, and what you do is interesting and exciting. Act nonchalant. It sounds crazy but that is what they want. And you don't have to be a dick about it either. Listen, I am no Don Juan, I am a fat guy and have no problems scoring. I travel on business often so I typically go out by myself which puts me at a disadvantage. But usually in any town I will score and even have a few women around me. I don't care about rejection or their opinions of me. I walk in any place like I am a wolf ready for a feast and they respond to it. I act like that guy. Well, I, too, am the nice guy but I always keep my knowledge of the game in check.

Jealousy.....you are a jealous maniac. Stop it! Women,even gringas hate insecure men. Latinas, forget about it. They want a man. You need to be in the power position with them. They want to be the one fawning all over you, not the other way around. I was once that overly jealous guy in my twenties. And I ruined relationships(even the love of my life over it.). I find men are overly jealous for 2 reasons:

1. They are doing the things they worry about their partner doing. Yeah, I cheated on my exes all the time so I always thought they would be too.

2. Lack of self worth and insecurity. May even hark back to Ch*ld hood or parental relationships.

Again, don't be jealous anymore and jus act like you don't care, even if it requires an Oscar performance. Make her truly believe, without saying it, that she is the lucky one and it would be her loss. Try it. Life is so much easier when you escape that prison of jealousy. Women love self confident men no matter how they look.

Someone wrote, "she may see the error in her ways and regret it." No way, she is a Tica. Ticas have a whole mindset unlike any women I've ever met. Of any nationality. Women don't make sense. Ticas are just plain loons. Their ration can't be rationalized. She will never regret how she treated you....they are not wired that way.

The K*D....you wrote that you love him. And you wrote that you have only seen him once; If you loved this K*D, thought it was yours, why haven't you seen him more? Have you seen a lawyer? What are your rights? If he is yours, then you should be able to spend time with him.

If you choose, you can still be part of his life. Even if you feel connected to him and even if he is not yours. I am sure, the real Dad, if not you, flew the coop. So why wouldn't she welcome a father figure in her Ch*ld's life.

Mongering.....is it for you? I'll bet you get yourself wrapped in a similar drama unless you make some life changes. CR is not for you, find a new sand box. If you want that true love and romance and you want a spouse or real GF.....stick with gringas or head down to South America...Colombia, Peru, Ecuador, Uraguay, Bolivia, Ven. You will find the real thing there and won't get raked over the coals.

Hey bro., again I think you are a good guy and I am only being harsh for your own good and others who may learn from this saga. I wish you the best but I really think you need to free yourself of some personal demons. You are better than what you think of yourself and you need to believe it and live it. Even if you have to fool yourself at first. Hit the gym, change your clothes, succeed more at work, write a novel, paint a masterpiece, anything that will boost your sense of self.

By the way, this saga is not unlike those of all the other novios. Weren't you reading CRT all along?

The more I read these types of stories the more I realize CR is not for everybody and we really need to have your head straight and be "in the game" on our trips. Believe me, it is easy to fall down there, and I know it but I keep my wits about me and just enjoy the romance for what it is, just a really great fling on a vacation. Leave it at that and our trips and lives will be much smoother. Again, these are putas.

BUENO SUERTE! & PURA VIDA!

Captain that was absoloutly brilliant! took the words right out of my mouth but with more eloquence.No woman wants a man who serves them,they want a man who is a challenge,it impliess a higher status man .Just read Doc Love on askmen.com he has a good system.

ever notice woman you blow off seem to have a crush on you? imagine doing that to a 9? haahaa

I believe once a woman takes a nickel for sex she is ruined for life,strippers too. JG

Mike321 · **Posted:** Sat Jul 11, 2009 9:29 am

Not much to add-but i think you should read and reread CC's post untill it SINKS IN.

MarkL54 · **Joined:** Thu Sep 20, 2007 8:06 pm **Posts:** 654

She had you after the first fullfilled RFM. It is amazing how love can turn to hate after a refused RFM. I am speaking from personal expeirence. I deleted her Phone number and cut all contact. Good luck with your future realationships, like they always say if it seems to good to be true it probably is. I think it pays to sometimes look at a realationship from a third party perspective to achieve some balance.

Pacifica55 · **Posted:** Sat Jul 11, 2009 1:41 pm

JerseyGringo wrote:

I believe once a woman takes a nickel for sex she is ruined for life,strippers too. JG

Some facts to back this outrageous statement up? Ridiculous assumption! What happens to girls who sold or danced in their twenties do they all just dry up and blow away?

Please, I see this comment often and it is completely unfounded. Laughable! :roll:

J0sie · **Posted:** Sat Jul 11, 2009 2:12 pm

Pac â€“ I can see both points. The threshold of taking money purely for sex is a big one to breach and in the Hispanic heritage a major no-no. Family is number one for us and by breaching that threshold you chastise yourself outside if not all of your family members a great majority of them. Some of them will understand the economics of it and some will never accept her into their part of the family. So when this chicas go into this line of work it will take a tremendous amount of either cerebral fortitude or emptiness of their soul that will be hard to recover from. (Playing couch psychiatricsâ€™ now)

ITOH â€“ There are many reasons why these girls do what they do. Because of that some will be forgiven and be able to forgive themselves many will not. I do not think that they are damage goods but it is a steeper hill to climb to go from hoâ€™ to housewife than if you come from a non-pro environments and the numbers do not lied. If %50 of the marriages are failing on the traditional sense, what are the odds of a chica to monger relationship succeeding?

I always treat the chicas as a gentleman because I tried to put myself on their shoes. Could I sell my ass on the Parque just because I need to feed my family? Could you? And even on a live or death situation I do not know if I could. So I do not know if it will take a twisted mind or soulless person to enter into this. Maybe neither but I could see going either way.

It does not take a experience to know that fire will burn just some common sense. I do not have to have entered into a relationship with a chica to know that is up hill from there. For those that have entered that type of relationship, wish you luck. I wish I could have that much cojones but I like to put the odds on my favor. My $.02.

Kickstand · **Posted:** Sat Jul 11, 2009 4:59 pm

J0sie wrote:

Pac â€“ I can see both points. The threshold of taking money purely for sex is a big one to breach and in the Hispanic heritage a major no-no. Family is number one for us and by breaching that threshold you chastise yourself outside if not all of your family members a great majority of them. Some of them will understand the economics of it and some will never accept her into their part of the family. So when this chicas go into this line of work it will take a tremendous amount of either cerebral fortitude or emptiness of their soul that will be hard to recover from. (Playing couch psychiatricsâ€™ now)...

Good points. Yes, we cannot completely generalize about the working chicas, but there are some issues with them that are just not the same with non-pros. Many, if not most, working chicas entered the p4p industry to improve their economic position. That's quite a sacrifice as you mentioned due to her family. They will eventually know or strongly suspect.

On the other hand, many non-pros would never do this regardless of their situation. I can't judge either group - I've never been in that type of economic position and Megan Fox has yet to offer me money for sex :lol:

I would suspect that it's easier to have a real relationship with a working chica who has or has developed enough common sense to understand her position in the industry and the relatively fleeting nature of her success. Maybe she figures this out when she starts working, maybe when her looks fade or maybe somewhere in between. Some will never figure it out until it's too late, and they are strung-out junkies or kicked to the curb by their no-account local boyfriend when she doesn't bring in enough money.

The lure of fast, easy money is very strong, and most of these chicas can't handle it. These ones will spend and borrow and spend as much as possible on clothes, shoes, drinks, drugs, Tico novio, family, etc. Feeding that sort of lifestyle is ultimately impossible. Look at how many professional athletes and entertainers (men and women) blow thru incredible amounts of money and then find themselves bankrupt when their fame fades.

Even if she does figure it out, she'll need a strong novio. If she's in the stronger position in the relationship as with Patriot, it isn't going to end well. I've never met Pac55, but he seems to be in a good place with his relationship.

JerseyGringo · **Posted:** Sun Jul 12, 2009 2:20 pm

Pacifica55 wrote:

JerseyGringo wrote:

I believe once a woman takes a nickel for sex she is ruined for life,strippers too. JG

Some facts to back this outrageous statement up? Ridiculous assumption! What happens to girls who sold or danced in their twenties do they all just dry up and blow away?

Please, I see this comment often and it is completely unfounded. Laughable! :roll:

Well Mr Pacifica ,since your asking ... what happens to girls who graduate from the scene ? is that what your asking? well im sure they don't take there money and invest it in worthwhile things then become wonderful house mothers ! (maybe a few)
My point is the mindset of the stripper,whore, prostitute..or any other woman who has sold rented or teased with her body is changed forever . Men are a way of getting things, there minds are being trained to say or do whatever it takes to get something from men ,its a mindset and a business.. Lies are acceptable and part of the fantasy .SO do you think this mindset shuts off when they find love ?

People don't understand that once they do the trick no longer is the shame or guilt of selling ones body .Its a very simple task for them . So if your x-hooker is in need of money and you are in Alabama and don't answer the phone -then a trip to the delrey ,strip club or webcam service is the same as delivering newspapers on her bicycle ..there is no shame or guilt ,if you would have answered the phone she wouldn't be doing it.When times are tough and they still have some beauty I believe all will go back to the scene ! why not ?its just delivering newspapers and in there minds its not cheating its Business .

For example I think If i had a x-provider as a girlfriend she would expect things from me and If I didn't provide it,It would lesson her love for me and make her look around ... wait? I think I just described all woman of the world ?haa haa :lol:

but lets stay on the topic .

In the case of this poor guy who's thread I hijacked ,His story is written 1000 times ,it is a typical example of gringo-puta relationship and it could have been prevented but Love is more powerfull then common sense .

Now define "ruined" if you think im saying that any woman who took a nickel can never be trusted in a loving relationship and be faithful? I believe it may be possible for some but the Mindset is still there and can be awaken.

Now I can use the same CONCEPT with cheating men who go with hookers ..they are ruined forever because once they cheat and go with a hooker the guilt and shame is gone and they will only do it again. when he dosent get any sex from his girl/wife he will justify doing a hooker because (really inside) he is looking for a reason to do it again .... its like riding his bicycle .

Its amazing how people can justify things in there own minds . I wish I could throw some stats or hard facts at you but everything im saying I learned HERE and in my own experiences . Take care .JG

Patriot · **Posted:** Sun Jul 12, 2009 2:35 pm

Looking over some of the critique I have to reply to some of the points made by others. Again for the benefit of new comers to CR and or mongering.
I fully respect every ones opinion but just want to elaborate on some of the points.

Pacifica55 Wrote:

Quote:

So you sabotaged yourself.

No question about it, I did. Not a good thing to do because I am harder on myself than any one else can ever be.

Quote:

What we can do is let her clearly understand that she makes her own choices and we make ours. If we are consistent and communicate well she will know what our choice will be and will model her behavior to fit (or not, depending).

This was done during the relationship but I think I really blew it when I let her go out with out me. She returned about an hour and a half later. It was at a resort in Guanacaste.

JOsie Wrote:

Quote:

WTF! I know you did not proofread this part. Because you knew she was always lying to you, you just accepted it. Chicas always lie, what the heck, WOMEN always lie. Our own fantasies we want to believe it but reality and logic are a bitch. Accepted, she never told you the true and be a little wiser the next time.

Sorry JOsie: Bull shit !!!!! How many times have we not given out details but not told the whole truth either. Whether for protection of ourselves or the protection of the partner.

Quote:

USA phone â€“ Bad idea and you gave her one so you could spy on her. Came back to bite you. Hopefully lessons learn.

Yes and No:
Yes to the bad idea.
NO it was not to spy on her: I fully explained that I would be able to see any and all of the numbers she called as well as to who and from where text messages were sent. We had actually discussed it for the few months before I got the phone, SHE decided she would accept it. I did not force it on her.

Quote:

Patriot wrote:
She has and will have a special place in my heart and mind for the rest of my life. I have no regrets about our relationship and would like to be with her still. If it should happen again with another lady I will pursue a relationship with her but know I will act differently. For now mongering will be best for me. I can get what I need for a while but there is no emotional attachment to make me phuck up.

These two statements do not make any sense. Iâ€™m not a psychiatrist nor I play one on TV but I get the feeling that you are not over this. I wish you well and thank you again for sharing. I think it is the road to recovery. Good Luck.

Disagree with you on them not making any sense. Any one who has experienced Love and it did not work out knows what I mean. I am also willing to take a chance at falling in Love again but also know that I can not allow myself to act like a phucking idiot.

Captain Cohiba Wrote:

Quote:

Yes, your chica was a puta....I don't care if you call her full time, part time, pro or semi pro, they are putas, and putas are whores.

Sorry CC Bull SHIT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Unless they prove to me they are a puta I donâ€™t generalize or assume they are !!!!

Quote:

Mongering.....is it for you? I'll bet you get yourself wrapped in a similar drama unless you make some life changes. CR is not for you, find a new sand box. If you want that true love and romance and you want a spouse or real GF.....stick with gringas or head down to South America...Colombia, Peru, Ecuador, Uraguay, Bolivia, Ven. You will find the real thing there and won't get raked over the coals.

I guess you didnâ€™t fully read and understand my post, especially the background. I have been to CR 6 times since the problems started and mongered on each one with out ANY emotional attachment to any of the ladies I was with.

Quote:

By the way, this saga is not unlike those of all the other novios. Weren't you reading CRT all along?

Yes I was reading CRT all along. The difference is I am not jaded by my experience like many of the other people who posted. Mine was a positive and beneficial learning experience for me.

MarkL54 Wrote:

Quote:

She had you after the first fullfilled RFM. It is amazing how love can turn to hate after a refused RFM. I am speaking from personal expeirence.

The first few RFMs were not full filled. It was not until after she was no longer working where I sent money. AND many of the recent RFMs HAVE NOT BEEN full filled. AND even after the ones that were not full filled we remained in contact and still saw each other. So love did not turn to hate

Lastly :
With out going into details, my life is not going well these days so I freely admit that my ego is in a fairly low state. Like many others out there in the same situation, there is light at the end of the tunnel and it is not an oncoming train.

Philosophical BS from Patriot
Besides even if it is an oncoming train you either let it pass and move on :!:

or get on and enjoy the ride

Educational BS From Patriot:
Josie wrote ( I am assuming about his own comment):

Quote:

Another Ad Hominem idiot.

From Wikepedia:

Quote:

Ad hominem argument is most commonly used to refer specifically to the ad hominem abusive, or argumentum ad personam, which consists of criticizing or attacking the person who proposed the argument (personal attack) in an attempt to discredit the argument. It is also used when an opponent is unable to find fault with an argument, yet for various reasons, the opponent disagrees with it.

J0sie · **Posted:** Sun Jul 12, 2009 3:12 pm

You ask for critique and now you complain

Pacifica55 · **Posted:** Sun Jul 12, 2009 7:25 pm

JerseyGringo, I am not going to go over your post line by line. Here is the way I see it working:

If any woman sees you as weak and an open wallet she can play you for as long as she likes. She won't respect you and she will do whatever she wants because she knows she can't: You aren't going to stop her. She is in charge.

As soon as you demonstrate that you are the shot caller that all changes. She doesn't pull crap because she knows she won't get away with it. Women who want to use men don't get involved with men who don't take crap. No future in it. As Cujo has said, girls don't send him RFMs because they know he isn't about to pay them and it would be embarrassing for them to get laughed at.

Instead, they go for the guys who think money can buy their love. In fact, the girl loses respect for the guy every time he caves and pays. He thinks he is buying his way deeper into her affections and what he is actually buying is her disdain. She thinks of herself as less than him and loses respect every time he puts himself below her. The train wreck is inevitable.

It is much easier to blame the woman but the truth is that women will act right when they know they have no other options. They go fishing when they think there are fish in the water.

Disclaimer: You can't catch marlin with a trout rod. If you don't have much to offer then don't go for a trophy. Indicator: If she does not want to be seen with you in public, you probably have the wrong girl. (There are plenty of nice looking girls who would be very happy with an old, out of shape gringo who was kind but had a set of balls. It is a sorting process and you do need the right tools.)

JerseyGringo · **Posted:** Sun Jul 12, 2009 7:45 pm

I have to say i agree with 100% and in no way did you contradict me ,you only gave a different perspective . That weakness thing works also in -when you chase a woman and she see's you will take her crap she loses respect for you ..hence if you make the rules an let her know you become a challenge which is the #1 thing that attracts woman . But you must agree with the "mindset" I described . and thank you for not going line to line that would just annoy everyone :lol:

peace .JG

Pacifica55 · **Posted:** Sun Jul 12, 2009 8:21 pm

They have two "mindsets": One is for working and if you fit the profile of a "John" then that is the mindset you get. The other is their "real person" mindset, without the actress BS. This one is reserved for men who laugh when they try to treat them like Johns.

CaptainCohiba · **Posted:** Sun Jul 12, 2009 8:52 pm

Patriot wrote:

Captain Cohiba Wrote:

Quote:

Yes, your chica was a puta....I don't care if you call her full time, part time, pro or semi pro, they are putas, and putas are whores.

Sorry CC Bull SHIT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Unless they prove to me they are a puta I donâ€™t generalize or assume they are !!!!

[quote]
REALLY :?:

You mentioned before she was a "semi-pro." I love how guys like to soften the fact that there chica isn't a puta by calling her a "semi-pro" :roll:

WTF

REALLY? Where do you think she went for that hour and half?

Patriot, just take the criticism and learn from it. Your responses make you look weaker and even more "grovel-ly." Just shut your trap and learn, and don't be defensive about it. Even in the critiques, most showed you much empathy. Your responses just show me what a circle jerk your sagas and posts have been. Like I said, you will just keep sabataging yourself. With your attitude, this cycle will continue. You will always be the victim because you just can't self examine and see the error in your ways. Stop this circle jerk.......don't respond anymore......learn from it and bury it. STOP LOOKING BACK AT THIS DEBACLE. If the K*D is yours, take care of him. But forget the rest and look at your life going forward. Things aren't going well right now, focus on that and making it better. Focus on your future forget the dreadful past.

Take the advice, don't respond!

PURA VIDA!

CaptainCohiba · **Posted:** Sun Jul 12, 2009 9:08 pm

whoops

Patriot · **Posted:** Mon Jul 13, 2009 9:16 am

As I wrote in my recent post on this subject, points about what happened in the relationship were made that I felt, based on the information I provided, were mis-interpreted and needed to be clarified. THAT IS ALL
My opinion of these chicas is different from many others on this board.
I, as well as every other poster, has every right to post their opinion on any subject presented, regardless of that opinion, AND EVERYONE NEEDS TO RESPECT THAT OPINION WITH OUT SUCH REMARKS AS

AS I SAID:

Quote:

Looking over some of the critique I have to reply to some of the points made by others. Again for the benefit of new comers to CR and or mongering.
I fully respect every ones opinion but just want to elaborate on some of the points.

My only complaint about any of the comments is that the above quote from JOsie was posted. All the other comments have been good advice. The rest are just differing opinions or views on these ladies. Which is what this board is all about

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