www.CostaRicaTicas.com

32) Other than Tijuana, Mexico or Managua, Nicaragua, the taxi drivers in CR are the friendliest and most honest in the world. They always know where you are going, and the fastest most direct route to get there. Even though their meter isn't running they always seem to know the correct fare. Don't forget to tip generously. They also know the best strip clubs, and can get you free drinks at Club Hollywood, Atlantis and other cool spots. And when you hear the words "taxi amigo?" after stumbling tipsily out of the hotel, don't hesitate to let them take you for a ride. Oh and look for the red cabs without the yellow triangle on the side... They can cut you a real special deal.

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Why settle for just one woman when you can enjoy them all?

Very fuuny. I see now what NOT to do. But seriously, we are leaving tomrrow for CR. I have a couple of serious questions:

1. Do these same rules apply for Jaco or just SJ?
2. What's the deal with wearing shorts? Should we wear ripped up jeans and soccer shirts so we can "blend" in better? We are going down for fishing so we are all pretty much just bringing Colombia fishing shirts etc..

Shorts at the beach are fine. Shorts in the Del Rey at night are fine too, they just mark you as a "Chivo". On the city streets they identify you as a tourist and a "mark" at great distance.

You will get the same questions at Jaco as the DR:

Where are you staying? (Do you have deep pockets?)

How long have you been here? (Do you know the score?)

How long are you staying? (Should I make the biggest short-term score possible or try for the long-scam?)

They will ask $100 and some will come off it and some won't. If it does not feel right, eject. It will get worse in strange ways. Remember, you are the hot commodity, not her. If she thinks you want her more than the money in your pocket she will try to get all of it.

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"Your love gives me such a thrill
but your love don't pay my bills,
I NEED THE MONEY!" - John Lee Hooker

Disclaimer: The above is merely the opinion of the author unless specific scientific data is included.
Your mileage may vary. https://costaricaticas.com/phpBB2/viewto ... 978#206978

Oh My God..you're actually RIGHT about that! That literally got me off my chair laughing....

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My best days are behind her.

Words of wisdom! This should be added to the general mongering FAQ.

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Philippine Photos | Philippine News | Philippine Weather | Philippine Ad Sales | My Flickr Photos

I'm confused, should I pay upfront just for the day or the whole stay?
Never mind, I'll pay the whole amount plus tip upfront. Why carry with me what will be hers anyway?
I just got an idea. Maybe I'll give her all my money and let her handle it, as a local she'll get me better prices!

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Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly!

33. ALWAYS use the taxis on the KL side especially when your lady tells you the driver knows all the shortcuts and you will save on the fare.
34. Walk back to the SL or Amistad or Castillo and be sure and blow (pun intended) the good and gentle folks in the park a big kiss to let them know how much you appreciate everything.
35. If you take the bus to Jaco, Liberia, or Tamarindo make sure you put all the luggage on the shelf so when you go to sleep, nobody will trip over it.
36. When going to a bank, always go to the front of the line and dare anyone to move you out of the way, just like in the States, paying NO attention to the guard who let you in, you know, the one with the loaded pistola out front. After all, your a gringo and they should notice how important you are.
37. At the airport, don't pay that silly exit tax. And if they insist, just tell them to bring the paperwork over and you'll give it back when your done with it, and $10 is all your going to pay this pinchi country.
38. Don't forget to tell the first policeman you see the drivers are almost as crappy as the roads and the water. Make sure he knows your going to be telling his superiors to get this stuff fixed immediately.

3P

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CR LOS or PI Come horny, Leave Happy
Being 'over the hill' is damn sure better than being under it!
I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.

39) It's okay of you don't know Spanish, just put an "o" at the end of all your words (i.e. "bringo me the checko por favor"). You'll fit right in.

This is top to bottom the 2nd funniest Thread on the Board--the first being of course a certain 2 Brothers musings on that Obama speech Thread...

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"A man accustomed to hear only the echo of his own sentiments, soon bars all the common avenues of delight, and has no part in the general gratification of mankind"--Dr. Johnson
"Amen, brother"-ED

40. Tip on getting a good night's sleep: Always allow your Del Rey date to watch your drink at the bar while you go and drain the snake! If you follow my advice you have a better chance of sleeping like the dead later... after you take her back to the hotel to do the horizontal bop!

41 tell your girl that it is ok to leave her cell phone on

42 the sign in your room that says no smoking does not apply to her

Fusionx,

You have it so right.

Ace

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PacoLoco: "You pay for it one way or another."
Ace: "Rent everything, do not buy in Costa Rica"

A year later and nothing has changed.. different girls (in some cases) but exactly the same attitudes

The same guidelines apply in the Philippines, as well.

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Philippine Photos | Philippine News | Philippine Weather | Philippine Ad Sales | My Flickr Photos

Make sure you wear a cowboy hat with your Hawaiian shirt with a camara around your neck. Talk with a Texas drawl. If someone tries to talk to you just tell em that you aint interested is learning Mexican talk and it they wanna talk to you, to talk in American. After all, you are there to spend your money and the should learn your language and your culture.