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I'm Sorry, But You Have To Be Perfect https://forum.costaricaticas.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=8519 |
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Author: | Jazz Musician [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 1:54 am ] |
Post subject: | I'm Sorry, But You Have To Be Perfect |
That was the title of a recent post I put up on the Miami Craig's List. Here's the full text, under, Men Seeking Women: Code: If you're over 35, I'll delete your email faster than you can say, "Bastard." That may sound unfair, since I'm 46, but no one ever said life is fair. If you're 25, even better. You move up the food chain.
There'll be no "pictures" exchanged whatsoever, because pictures suck, and are misleading. Just know that if we set something up and upon meeting, you're larger than a size 4, don't have perfect skin, thick hair, a pretty smile, warm eyes and a ruthless body, my indifference to you will be immediate and without sentiment. If I stay, you're only half-way home. The rest depends on what flows from your perfect lips. If I'm not entertained, or at least learn something, make sure your credit card is handy because you'll have to get the check after I "excuse" myself. Finally, please, no female "flamers" for this add. Take your sexual frustrations out on someone else. These are my rules, so deal with it. Most women are so used to calling the shots with pussy-whipped men (while simultaneously complaining about bad boys), that they forget that men are the risk-takers in the "love and romance" dance. Women just "show up" and look good. If you can't handle this post, move on to another. There's plenty of wimps here to choose from who'll get on one knee in the first 5 minutes, and say all the right things - which you know are all wrong. I can't tell you how many female feathers I ruffled with this post. Of course, all kinds of hot girls sent me pictures (because I said I didn't want them), and complained about my "approach. Here are a few sample responses: -------------------------------------------------------------------------- You have caught my attention. Ali ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- I dont think perfect exists....sorry that youre so unlucky. You will never be satisfied....alot of coldless fucks or unatractive smart conversations...one or the other. The medium probably left you. The only reason Im answering to this ad...is because Im attracted to pricks like you....and that sucks for me. Good luck on your next perfect date. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Not here for application, have passed the requirement age… You're funny…that's going to challenge my gender intellect... and may help restoring some kind of higher standard! Life's not fair? As long as one applies my rules…yes it is! Good luck ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Are you perfect? Are you over 6', with all your hair, and the proverbial, "Tall, Dark and Handsome?" Do eloquent words flow through your perfectly shaped and soft kissable lips? Does your smile light up a room? Does the college you have a high degree from speak volumes about who you are as a person? Do your eyes tell tales of fun, excitement, and lust for life? Do you have an outgoing sense of humor that sends everyone into fits of laughter with a mere re tale of your madcap encounters? Do you get pedicures and manicures in your exclusive "member's only" gym/spa? Do you have a low percentage of body fat and well defined abs... As well as lats? Because those are for holding onto, not "love handles".. And, prey tell, do you let a lady order whatever she desires from the menu of the best restaurant that you chose to take her to? Without quibbling over the 18% gratuity? What about your house? Is it large, beautiful, clean, and well organized? Can you make a killer breakfast in bed? Or order out and remember my favorite foods? Do you dress well? Is your completely filled and organized closet bigger than mine? And last, but definitely not least, do you have a full, thick, at least 8"? Because it isn't the motion of the ocean...And because I love all this... And because I'm damn near perfect... I am a lot of the things I require. And I get cherished and treated very well by men who may not be perfect, but come extremely close...However no one is absolutely perfect. What I've found is that with a little less superficiality, I can appreciate men that treat me like the queen I am... Regardless of my less than perfection. But mark my words, I'm damn near intellectual perfection, and borderline physical. I am comfortable with myself. I don't need a trophy or arm charm to entertain me or make me look better. What say you? Oh, by the way... My pics are very real. I look identical, and I look like a different woman daily. God given blessings and talent. I wish you the best of luck in your search, though you might want to rethink your approach...Peace. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I know I'll phuck this last one. She's primed, sent me all kinds of pics, showed off her silicone, a video of her singing - pretty impressive since she wants me to "rethink" my approach. The one who said she's out of my age requirements is very cool, maybe 38, slim and a fox. Also educated. There were many more that I discarded. I keep telling you guys to be a challenge and don't let the most dangerous creature on earth, the beautiful woman, intimidate you. Put them in their place and they'll lick your balls... Feel free to use my post on another site. PM me if you get similar results. Ciao for Now! Jazz |
Author: | TicaFan [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 7:09 am ] |
Post subject: | |
That last one is hillarious. What a horrible personality she has. To me, she's in effect, comparing dick sizes with you. You gotta let us know how it goes. |
Author: | Rolex [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:23 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Classic. Very interesting psych. test you've done. Now you just have to work your "blammo" on her. Keep us posted! |
Author: | Traveler0818 [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:46 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Jazz, great post! This was very interesting! I liked your apporach and will keep it in mind. |
Author: | Mucho Gusto [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:58 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Jazz, That was a classic! Well done!!! You're obviously a 'man with a plan' ! Pura Vida, Mikey B. |
Author: | Rolex [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 10:05 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Well, right now he's still just a man with a hand. But we'll await results. ![]() |
Author: | Traylor Park [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 4:53 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
I'm posting the ad on criagslist in Chicago, see what type of results i get... will keep you all posted. This is the ad I posted today... I modified it just a bit... "No one over 30 need apply." If you're over 30, I'll delete your email faster than you can say, "Bastard." That may sound unfair, since I'm 36, but no one ever said life is fair. If you're 25, even better. You move up the food chain. There'll be no "pictures" exchanged whatsoever, because pictures suck, and are misleading. Just know that if we set something up and upon meeting, you're larger than a size 4, don't have perfect skin, thick hair, a pretty smile, warm eyes and of course attractive, my indifference to you will be immediate and without sentiment. If you're overweight you should be working on losing the the extra pounds... don't waste my time. If you meet the above criteria, you're only half-way home. The rest depends on what flows from your perfect lips. If I'm not entertained, or at least learn something, make sure your credit card is handy because you'll have to get the check after I "excuse" myself. Finally, please, no female "flamers" for this add. Take your sexual frustrations out on someone else. These are my rules, so deal with it. Most women are so used to calling the shots with pu*sy-whipped men (while simultaneously complaining about bad boys), that they forget that men are the risk-takers in the "love and romance" dance. Women just "show up" and look good. If you can't handle this post, move on to another. There's plenty of wimps here to choose from who'll get on one knee in the first 5 minutes, and say all the right things - which you know are all wrong. Am I just trying to be an asshole? NO! I'm just being honest... and you should appreciate my honesty. p.s. if all you're looking for is a soul mate or a prince to sweep you off your feet, wake up!! That's never going to happen!! Do you want to be all by your lonesome for the rest of your miserable life? You only live once!! Pura vida!! p.s.s. If you're just looking for friendship and companionship, you'll have to be a really special person for me to consider the offer. |
Author: | Wilecoyote [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 5:40 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Jazz Musician: Can you or will you post some pictures or video if possible??? Wile Coyote |
Author: | Joluko [ Wed Oct 12, 2005 5:44 pm ] |
Post subject: | I call dibs on Dallas |
Ok - I'm calling dibs on that post for the dallas craigslist!!!! Well said Jazz. ./JLK |
Author: | Ace [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 9:11 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Keep up the good work boys. I love it. ![]() |
Author: | BlueSkies [ Sat Oct 15, 2005 2:13 am ] |
Post subject: | |
ok i posted it on manhattan craig's list with my own slight modifications IT'S MY EXPERIENCE that Florida woman are more friendly that manhattan types, but you have a good angle here i'll let you know as i'm only doing this for fun and as a group activity. ![]() I'm glad your commenting on this Rolex, because you always have good insight on the dance. |
Author: | Tman [ Sun Oct 16, 2005 1:32 am ] |
Post subject: | |
GOD I'm glad I dont have to play this gringa dating game anymore...internet ads, singles bars, fancy cars, posturing. I get smiles everyday just walking downtown San Jose, have a thankful Colombiana GF, and live within 5 mintues of the Delrey, Zona Blue, IDEM and Kamur. You guys have fun now... ![]() |
Author: | PacoLoco [ Sun Oct 16, 2005 10:44 am ] |
Post subject: | |
Rub it in why don't you, YOU BASTARD! ![]() |
Author: | Right Hand Man [ Sun Oct 16, 2005 12:09 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
I have given up on gringas. I now pursue only latinas in the states. Second date today with a Venezuelan holding a student visa. Not permanently in the states yet, SO, she cannot adopt the gringa mentality. We have a deal to study each other's languages. I think we will also be studying chemistry as well as anatomy and physiology. ![]() Next best thing to being in a latin american country. |
Author: | Tman [ Sun Oct 16, 2005 9:46 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Go for it RHM...but I know during your studies you will be closing you eyes...and imagining you are back ringside at Kamur or Grillon with all that CR muff staring you in the face and rubbing against you. This Venezuelan girl will think she is hot stuff getting such a reaction from you... ![]() See you back down here soon... |
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