www.CostaRicaTicas.com :: View topic - HEARTACHES BY THE NUMBER...TROUBLE BY THE SCORE....

www.CostaRicaTicas.com https://forum.costaricaticas.com/

HEARTACHES BY THE NUMBER...TROUBLE BY THE SCORE.... https://forum.costaricaticas.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=5137	Page 1 of 6

Author:	Gringo Malo [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 8:33 pm ]
Post subject:	HEARTACHES BY THE NUMBER...TROUBLE BY THE SCORE....
Hey Guys. I am really troubled and seek honest input from those who care to. I recently completed my 5th trip to CR. In the last year I have spent 66 total days in country. As a former cop, I am basicly very street smart . I have almost never paid CIEN and am quite good at negotiating with the girls..even to the point where others ask me to help them. I have been a member of this site since last April and have read almost every post. My posts are often one liners of dry humor, actual helpful information for others and communication with the friends I have met here on CRT. Initially, I spoke no Espanol, but have progressed reasonably well learning and continue to learn more every day. Unlike most, many of my experiences have been outside the gulch. I have a decent number of friends in CR both as EX Pats and even ticos. I enjoy the bars and massage parlors and clubs at times but quickly tired of them as an everyday event. Most of us do evolve and do different things as we become more experienced. On the home page of this site is an article about marrying a tica. I know and understand the positives and negatives of the process. I have been "ALONE" for a very long time and sincerely admit that I would like something more permanent. I know very well not to even consider taking a DR Chica and try making her change her tune. It would be like giving a drug addict a job in your pharmacy. Back in August, 2 days before I had to return stateside, I was with a friend (an unnamed board member) and we were down on Avenida Central checking out the locals. Practicing our spanish and trying to make contact with locals. Just after dark during rush hour I spotted a nice looking young lady carrying 2 shopping bags and walking very briskly. I greeted her and got a smile. With my broken spanish, convinced her to join us for coffee in a nearby sodas. With dictionary in hand I proceeded to visit with her. She spoke almost no english but we definately made a connection. I bought her a rose and got her to agree to meet me the next afternoon, on the avenue for a date. The next day, we met in front of spoons cafe. She was very punctual but surprised me by bringing along her 4 year old daughter. I was surprised but not disapointed. We went to Rosti Pollo for chicken and had a very nice time. We later went to a park where she proceeded to get out her manicure equipment and give me a first rate manicure(her profession). Later she took me by bus to her home that she shared with 2 other couples. Talk about poor...I have more in one closet in my house that should be thrown out than she owns. In a very meek voice she explained that she is from Honduras, had 2 Chldren with a violent Tico and finally broke away on her own. I later met the Tico when he came into the News Cafe on my subsequent trip and threatened to kill me. This is no longer a problem as the next day 2 Costa Rican Policia friends of mine went to his place of employment and took him down a hallway for a talk. I don't know what was said but he returned with a noticable limp and they assured me that I would have no further problems with him. She is not a resident and doesn't benefit from the CR socialized medicine. She said, we are very poor..but very happy. There was almost nothing to eat in the house. I did not care what happened next..but was bound and determined that these Kds would eat for awhile. I grabbed her hand and off we went to Mas o Menos. I filled a cart with what ever she wanted. She was very sensible. Lots of beans and rice, staples and small portions of meat and produce. The male half of another couple in the house later acted as an interpretor. Basicly she wanted to know what I wanted from her. I basicly told her that I liked her very much, that I had an open heart and would like to see more of her and get to know her better. I did say that it was my last night and I would like it if she would come and spend some time alone with me. We then took a taxi to my apartment and shared some supper with 2 of my friends. We then retired to my apartment and cuddled on the bed and I think shared a couple very brief kisses. She was rigid and reluctant. She basicly inquired if I would be her boyfriend. It seemed that if I said yes, then things would happen. I could not lie to her and only said that I would have to know her better and longer before I could commit to that. Yes, I flew home the next morning with blue balls...but then..that has happened to me before. We exchanged email addresses and stayed in contact. My friend dropped by her shop from time to time and gave her some small amounts of money as a regalo from me. She was always very grateful. I returned to CR for 18 days in Sept/Oct and surprised her. She was so very happy to see me( aren't they all). Upon my return, we saw a lot of each other...mostly during the day at her work and then into the evenings. No sex at first and I wasn't pushing it. I didn't have to because I would later, wheel it to the gulch and party a bit...cut a deal and take care of business. After several days she very politely informed me that I had been seen in the Del Rey and that I had my hand on a girls leg. Her shop was East of the Presidente and frequented by many PUTAs. I did not deny it, explained that she and I were only friends so far and asked her if she wanted me to go away. She said "no, only me..please only me". That night she came to my apartment and everything was complete. I could tell that she had not been sexual in some time because of certain muscular problems that occurred( I'm no Vegas Bob you know ). Our times together have been great. Lots of personal time together and also times with los ninos at everything from Burger King Playland, Ninos Museo and Parque Diversion (by my choice). I have given her a mixture of gifts that she might like and things that she might need. Always taxi fare and babysitter money. Each gift was greeted with much gratitude. She never asked for anything. At the end of September, all residents were evicted from her house because of a hillside flooding problem. She moved into a pension in a terrible area near Coca Cola. God, it was horrible and I asked her to try for better. On October 2, I returned to the " Frozen Tundra", not to return until this January. We of course kept in contact by phone and email. This girl has never asked me for anything. In mid december, I got a fairly desparate call from her telling me that she had an opportunity to share an apartment with an old senora, former neighbor who had babysat for her in her first place. Could I please send her $100 for rent. I was very glad to do it, had actually wanted to do it sooner. I immediately sent her a bit more by western union. (I had to arrange it and explain to her how to retrieve the money.) Again, she was very thankful. By this time, I had made arrangements for my next visit. It would be for 2 weeks from Jan 8-22. I gave her my flight number, arrival time and asked her to meet me at the airport ( airport hellos are much more joyful then airport goodbyes). She readily agreed. On Jan 7th , I received a very angry email from her. The translation was difficult... her tone was different and she was telling me that I did not need to lie to her. I was clearly puzzeled. I emailed back that there was apparently a misunderstanding, that my flight times were the same and I hope she would be at the airport. I arrived on time, hit the banos,dashed some cash from the ATM, cleared immigration, baggage claim and customs in about 9 minutes. When I approached the escalator, I could see her jumping up and down and waving her arms . All is well. When I exit the building, she tackles me, kisses me violently ...all to loud cheers of cabbies and bystanders. She has a private taxi waiting and off we go to Vista Linda. It was a very joyful night. The next day, I learned that a puta had told her ( possibly Mellani ) that I was in country and at Del Rey 3 days prior to my actual arrival. Things were good..but things were different. She began to ask for things. The Old Senora actually reminded me that the rent was going to be due soon and even thought that I might purchase the needed uniform for her daughter who was just starting college( 18, cute as a bug, and followed me around the apartment like a puppy). Things were definately different. More and more requests. I went along with it for a while and then confronted her about it. I explained that I enjoyed being good to her but was getting really tired of being solicited constantly. I also informed her that I had a approximate amount of money that I could spend onher and if she got it in one form, she may not get it in another. She immediately apoligized and said that she would never ask for anything again. I then questioned why she was diferent and she addmitted that all the other parties were encouraging her to bleed me. Ya, the "Rico Gringo thing". Our time together was great. Took her on her first airplane ride...Sansa to Quepos in turbulent sky. I think I still have the nail marks in my arm where she dug in. In truth, I really enjoy her and her Chldren. Her Kds, especially her daughter adore me. Now is when things thicken even more. On January 21, we are around town doing the last day stuff. I whip into Horseshoe to exchange some cash. She waits outside. As I start to leave, she comes whipping through the door and grabs me. She guides me around to a blackjack table and introduces me to Melani. It turns out that she used to share an apartment with Melani and had to move out because her daughter began asking about all the men that Melani was bringing home. My girl said that Melani is very lucky. She has many gringo boyfriends who send her money, and has plenty of money to spend in the casino. She also explained that Melani had helped her with money many times in the past. I fly home the next day after the tearful airport fairwell (yup..me to). All is well except that I miss her. She emails every few days and calls from time to time. She says the Ch*ldren want to know when I will be back. Then last sunday she calls, happy to speak to me but tells me she is having problems with the Senora and is staying with Melani. She puts Melanis boyfriend on the phone..who explains that she wants to know if I will give her permission to go to the casino with them and also that she loves me very much. Wow, this girl really respects me right? Of course , I consent, I am honored that she would ask permission. On this past tuesday, I call my friend who now lives in CR. He says, I heard you got a phone call. I say ya, why. He responds, that my girl has been at the casino for 3 days straight, for quite a few hours each day in the company of Melani. That she approached my friend and asked him to please not tell me...that she was only there because she needed the money. I ask for an honest appraisel, if she is selling her butt. He reponds that each time he saw her, she was right at the table with Melani and did not know. In a week now, there is no phone calls, an email from me inquiring about why she hasn't called or written was answered yesterday with.." because I do not write or call does not mean I do not love you". None of the small talk as usual. None of the Besos and besitos as before. As I said in an earlier post, Melani had reportly had her boyfriend thrown in jail and then proceeded to steal everything he owned out of his apartment. I admit that I am ripped up about it... I pray to god that my girl was not part of it and hope that she has not turned to this life. I know that time will tell all. I think jumping a plane pronto....but then think better of it. Distance is protecting me right now and that is good..I guess. There it is guys..hope I haven't bored you. Fire away.

Author:	DEAR_JOHN [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:04 pm ]
Post subject:
Edited.

Author:	Thirdworld [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:05 pm ]
Post subject:
This is a tough one. I'm a cynical bastard but thought it was a nice story UNTIL, this Melani showed up. Not hard to tell that she is trouble. And it sounds up until the casino part that your girl was probably not working. Some of the chicas down here who are really poor, like yours seems to be, also see gringos as a money machine. But not in the same way as the DR putas. Girls like this see things more in a survival mode. If you do continue to see her, I would sit down with her and someone who speaks fluent English and Spanish and explain things in no uncertain terms. One being, if you are seriously interested in her, that she stay the hell away from the whores. They won't do anything but be a bad influence on her. A question, do you see her being someone longterm, or do you feel a bit sorry for her and her situation, and just want to help? Anyhow, just proceed with caution and don't try to fool yourself if you see signs. If you spend enough time with her, you'll know if she's for real.

Author:	TexasNVegas [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:06 pm ]
Post subject:
I think you have read her right, each step of the way. The main problem is she has a puta friend who has corrupted her. It is probably too late to save her from herself.

Author:	Osgood [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:08 pm ]
Post subject:
well,you are her credit card............the relationship is based on her,not you....kick her to the kerb and see what happen's........let her beg to be your credit card again................

Author:	Thirdworld [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:17 pm ]
Post subject:
Gotta tell you, I would get this Melani chick away from your girl. But I've got total respect for Melani. Would love to have a salesperson like this working for me. The ones I have no respect for and total disdain are the idiots sending her money. They deserve all the heartache coming to them. Seems like your girl is a different case than the working girls, if you can save her in time.

Author:	Coqui [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:18 pm ]
Post subject:
First off please devide your posts into paragraphs its raher hard to read a single text especially such a facinating story. Well in all likelyhood your girl is now in that lifestyle of selling her body for money. Mostly out of need and mostly because of bad influences of other people. It does seem she has genuine feelings for you which is very good but you need to decide something. Is this person someone you want to make a comitment to? you cant have a part time relationship with someone who is in CR. It has to be all or nothing. It seems like you really do have deep feelings for her but you should decide what you want out of this. As for her asking for money well frankly you kind of spoiled her. And even though she is respectfull of you its like blood in the water and other sharks are aware of fresh meat. So beware that those e-mails may be read by someone other than your chica and that money might not be getting into the hands of your chica. There are allot of vultures out there who prey on these situations. Another thing is that you cant ask her for a comitment if you dont want to give her one. So my suggestion is decide what you want and then take action.

Author:	Gringo Malo [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:34 pm ]
Post subject:
Thanks for the response guys. I am truely sorry about the paragraph thing. I don't do it well and that is probably why many of my posts are very short. She has been a great companion and lover. She knows that I am interested in a long term and in truth..the final chapter has not been written. I have willingly helped her in a measured sense. The things I have given her she truely desparately needed. My financial investment has been very small compared to paying working girls. That is not an issue other than as stated. My loss in this case is purely in an emotional sense.

Author:	Gringo Malo [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:39 pm ]
Post subject:
Also, my January trip was basicly a 1 girl trip. I made one trip to ZB and regretted it afterward. She was all I wanted and I could have had others. I went to happy hour a couple times and actually sat with my back to the chicas...ask Vegas Bob

Author:	DEAR_JOHN [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:43 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Distance is protecting me right now and that is good And that is GOOD. Amigo, I have been following this lifestyle (sex tours to different countries) since around 1998 starting with redsnake.com, and nothing, I repeat, NOTHING, has really changed since those days. Love sick gringos meeting vulnerable cute ladies from other countries. A couple of weeks ago, I had one of the best couple of hours I have ever had with a semi-pro. It was just like making love with someone you care about. I got her email addy, however told her my ISP was fixing to change and did not give her mine. I still have hers, but since I have read all of these stories for several years, I just don't want or need to put myself in the position of caring for somebody. For all I know, I will find out in a couple of months that the condom broke (which it didn't) or that she hurt herself. Possibly a lot of positive emails, all heading toward 'send money gringo' or the condom broke and I am 'late'. My good buddy hooked up with a chica and they swapped a couple of emails, then he finally got the one I told him to expect....the one requesting money, however she put a spin on it I didn't see coming. See mentioned hanging herself because she was so broke. From your post, you apparently do need someone to care for, however you will find more heartbreak in your future and there will always be some sort of aggravation between the highs and lows of an affair of the heart 2,000 miles away. Unlike one of the above posters, I don't see myself as a cynic, just real well read, have seen this many times before, and consider myself somewhat educated, learning from many reports from the past. You need to let distance keep protecting you.

Author:	Coqui [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 9:43 pm ]
Post subject:
RealmanK wrote: Also, my January trip was basicly a 1 girl trip. I made one trip to ZB and regretted it afterward. She was all I wanted and I could have had others. So marry her and move her and her K*ds to the states or you move down to CR.

Author:	Gringo Malo [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 10:08 pm ]
Post subject:
Her situation is very complicated...actually more tragic than the rest. The Ch*ldren are both from the same tico. The daughter was born in Honduras as again, because of the violence she went back to her family. The daughter has a Honduran passport. She returned to CR because her mother said she shamed the family. She says that she returned to the Tico because she had no choice. She then got pregnant again by him and while pregnant, he beat her and punched her teeth right through her lip. ( I can see the scar if I look carefully.) The boy was born in CR. By law he is ordered to pay support on only the boy. He does not and it is not worth pursuing(Pura Vida). She can leave CR with the girl, but not with the boy unless he gives permission. He has a restraining order against him that denies him contact with all 3.

Author:	Admin 1 [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 10:25 pm ]
Post subject:
RK That was so heartfelt that I took it upon my self to do some basic webster paragraph editing.. Hope you don't mind... I wish you all the best my friend. NO this does not come under Admin now edits posts for grammar and paragraph form....

Author:	Rolex [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 10:37 pm ]
Post subject:
I enjoyed your story... as a story. But ask yourself these questions: - Who needs this drama in their life? - Are you being emotionally weak and are you subject to the "White Knight" syndrome? (Yes, I tend to be, too.) - Do you realize that you are placing the blame for her circumstances on EVERYTHING BUT HER? Bad things happen to good people.... temporarily. But bad things keep happening to the same people, again and again, because they make POOR CHOICES. However sweet she may be... do you NEED A PERSON IN YOUR LIFE THAT MAKES POOR CHOICES? (Again, I'm not talking about finanically poor. You can be dirt poor financially, and still make choices that don't continually attract drama into your life. Read Oprah's biography and see where she started. Or Sam Waltons). - Do you realize that you are an attractive, sought-after wealthy man (at least by CR standards) and that you do not have to "settle" for such bullshit? Dump the broad. Move on. Plenty more in the sea, without the baggage. Life is too short to drink tainted wine. - Rolex.

Author:	Gringo Malo [ Sun Feb 13, 2005 11:20 pm ]
Post subject:
Thanks ADMIN for the editing. Do you tutor? Thanks too, for the hardball responses. I have been suspicious and cautious all along. I have had compassion for her all along..but not pity. I had offered her only friendship and help if she did not want romance. I know all about the choices thing and have pointed these things out to her each step of the way. Yes, it was her bad choices that made her a single mother of 2, trapped in a foreign land with no support system of Family or true friends. I am a decent looking, caring guy who has lots of other alternatives. I can replace her in a shot...many times over. I KNOW that I am the best thing that ever happened to her and her Ch*ldren. If she wants to screw this up...then so be it. I will play this out for awhile and watch where it goes. As my heartache is replaced by anger...things will all fall into place.

Page 1 of 6	All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group https://www.phpbb.com/