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| Lifestyle Choice--Objective Advice Wanted https://forum.costaricaticas.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=25708 |
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| Author: | 1life2live [ Sun Oct 26, 2008 4:10 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Lifestyle Choice--Objective Advice Wanted |
I don't know if I have a case of the "grass looks greener" on the other side, but I thought I put this out there to get some objective feedback. I'm 33 years old and have gotten out of the habit of dating and instead just working and taking short trips to Costa Rica. This has been going on for 5-6 years. I haven't made any real effort in my dating life. I guess I have just been spoiled with the Ticas. On top of that, everyone I know is in in the process of getting divorced. At times I think that I may be screwing myself by not finding a girl friend/wife and do the normal family thing. I have been fortuante enough to enjoy the paradise of Costa Rica (many times) and Rio (once) and I love both places. I'm not the type to have a girl friend in the USA and continue to take my weekend getaways So for those with a bit of experience under your belt, would you suggest that someone my age settle down or continue my current lifestyle? Thanks, 1life2live |
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| Author: | Cujo's [ Sun Oct 26, 2008 4:29 pm ] |
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Men are as faithful as thier options.. 
I'm almost in the same exact boat as you. I don't necessarily date either but have 4 or 5 solid FWB's. That's more than enough for me while here in the states not to mention the random hook up now and then. I would say keep doing what you do until you don't want to anymore. But I would also suggest hooking up locally so you don't lose you're touch in the non p4p arena.. 
Cujo |
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| Author: | 1life2live [ Sun Oct 26, 2008 8:59 pm ] |
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Jadcujo and everyone that has pm'd me, thank you for the advice. this board is great. thanks, 1life2live |
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| Author: | Zippy [ Sun Oct 26, 2008 9:17 pm ] |
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Quote: Men are as faithful as thier options..
Have to love that line.... I would do what is right for you. Why change anything if you are happy. If you someday you run across something really TRULY special it warrants futher investigaion but never get serious with a hooker like Rolltide did. Learn from others blunders & try not to fumble  .
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| Author: | Ameritico [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 12:33 am ] |
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I can tell you I’m 30 years old and I’ve done it all…. I was married at 19 to Tica (big mistake) we moved to Vegas (even bigger mistake ) and then got divorced at 21 and still did’t learn…. I knocked up my GF, thinking I had the happiness you seem be to be looking for, then broke up within a year…. Like you said: people you know are getting divorced… It’s tuff man… Now I’ve been back and forth between the US and CR and all I can say is keep doing what you are doing until you don’t want to do it anymore… I just made a big move myself... I haven't lived here in CR since 95 I just left everything behind and decided to do this now while I still can and like everything I hope I don't regret it.. If I do then I learned from it... |
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| Author: | Bilko [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 2:21 am ] |
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One answer isn't right for everyone. Some guys really feel they are missing out by not having Ch*ldren and doing the nuclear family option. I am 59 and I don't regret not doing it. I lived most of my life in one town and saw a lot of people do their things over the years. Those that have a relationship last long enough to raise a K*D even through high school are rare. People that seem to get along just fine end up splitting up and those around them ask each other, who'd a thunk it? Don't assume that the people you see putting up a brave front are necessarily happy in their situations. Maybe you would be, with the right person, but there's the rub. Who is the right person, and how do you go about finding her? I don't have a tale of woe to tell about a broken marriage or a problem Ch*ld, but others here certainly do. A bad marriage and/or other family problems can devastate a person. I don't know anybody who is devastated by having to monger in Costa Rica. Some drink themselves to death, but I doubt it's due to lack of Ch*ldren. Alcoholics seem to be about the same distribution as non-alcoholics as far as whether they have an ex-wife and/or K*D. You may get lucky, or you may not. I think the downside of not is a lot bigger than the upside of lucky, but that's just me. Mileages vary. |
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| Author: | DiegoC [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 4:56 pm ] |
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It really depends on what you think life is all about and what you want out of your life. My experience was marrying someone I didn’t really love because I stupidly thought it was the right time and I was at the age to get married. The marriage was a disaster and became a living hell. It caused pain for years to my parents, brothers and the rest of my extended family. It is hard to admit it when you do something really foolish, but getting married because I thought it was time, was the DUMBEST thing I ever did! I have lived to regret it and additionally paid an incredibly heavy price, as did the rest of my family. Don't buy, rent! |
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| Author: | Redman69 [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 7:12 pm ] |
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life, I wish I could tell you what to do. But it is your life and you have to live it. I will say if you don't want K*ds, don't marry. If you do want K*ds the truth is what ever you do to their mother you do to them. I can say you have the power to chose who their mother is. If you want them. From an ole guy, |
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| Author: | FishFace [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 7:45 pm ] |
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If you never get married and have K*ds the only person you will ever have to please is youself. That is not a bad way to go thru life. |
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| Author: | Seabreeze0003 [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 8:02 pm ] |
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Wow. Well, from the ranks of the middle aged: Marriage is inevitably going to be a mix of bad and good. Some have more good and some have more bad. Family life is certainly rewarding, but so is single life. Either way you will have to give up something. Like most of the previous replies, I would say that which way is better for you is something only you can determine. The grass is always greener on the other side... There are probably a lot of guys who would like to trade places with you right now. But there are probably a lot in your circumstance who want to trade too. |
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| Author: | DiegoC [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 8:37 pm ] |
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1life2live Most men that I know who are married would get out of the marriage if they knew they would not get hammered in divorce court. As my Dad told me when I got divorced, “Well, that is the phucking you get for the phucking you got.†Neither of experience was good. You really need to ask your married friends to be honest with you: If you could get out of your marriage unscathed, in other words, you could come out of it even, not getting beaten financially, saddled with Ch*ld support and alimony, keeping your pension, investments, houses, and vehicles, would you? |
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| Author: | Rainman3 [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 9:22 pm ] |
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Srilm wrote: I am a little bit older (less than 10 years) than you, and I already have deep regrets about not being married and having K*ds (I shouldn't really say regret, as I have been trying for 20 years to get married -- so I've been holding up my end of the bargain).
I am the kind of person that would rather try something and get burned by it, than not try it at all. It takes a really honest self-evaluation to decide if this is important enough to pursue it, realizing that there is a 50-50 chance that it will end in heartache and hardship. Just don't leave yourself in a position where you're 70 years old saying "I wish I had..." SR Srlim, Well, I did try it........TWICE ! And came damn close to a third time with my Colombiana ex fiancee. Regarding my first two marriages I was fortunate enough to escape fairly well unscathed, other than the tremendous emotional scars ( especially of # 2 ) . Now my 2 girls are in college and my 15 yo son lives with me. Overall I am pretty happy. While I don't chase pu*sy here in the States to hard, I won't look a "gift horse in the mouth". I work hard here and plan my next escape. In the event I was to get married once again it would have to be a woman eho really blows me away in every way. Im not going to say it is imposible, but highly doubtful at this point. At this point Im more interested in Ms. Right Now as oppossed to Ms. Right. 
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| Author: | PacoLoco [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 9:22 pm ] |
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I have the perfect girl for you- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTkp9UqVVHs
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| Author: | Spanky [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 9:28 pm ] |
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PacoLoco wrote: I have the perfect girl for you-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTkp9UqVVHsThat was phucking depressing but oh so real. 
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| Author: | PacoLoco [ Mon Oct 27, 2008 9:46 pm ] |
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 Sorry, reality sucks sometimes.
Seabreeze0003 wrote: Either way you will have to give up something. Yes everything has a price.
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