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| A Gentlemen's guide to Costa Rica https://forum.costaricaticas.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=19337 |
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| Author: | Xray27 [ Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:46 am ] |
| Post subject: | A Gentlemen's guide to Costa Rica |
Is it me or has there been a huge rise in hostile, personal attack posts recently? I have only been a member for about a year but I don't remember ever seeing so many "brothers" insulting each other. I find myself logging in praying that there will be positive energy and helpful debate and not smears against one another. I am a bit of a newbie and have only met a handful of you guys in person but until now I always had a better vibe frome this site. Just my thoughts...Flame away..... When I first joined the greatest thing about this site was that everyone seemed to be amigos, brothers if u will. I f I had stumbled upon it today I would wonder....... |
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| Author: | Admin 1 [ Thu Sep 27, 2007 8:41 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
XRAY27 Thank you for bringing up something many have forgotten this is a GENTLEMEN'S GUIDE TO COSTA RICA! We should act like gentlemen treat everyone with respect agree to disagree and so on. A simple point like this needs to be remembered. Look within yourself when becoming hostile and ask yourself why? Were you personally attacked? Does someones off the wall post deserve an attack of a personal nature rather than a simple re-direction of the proper way something should be handled. Remember we were all newbies once, some common courtesy will keep the board fresh, as well as a pleasant place for everyone to come and share their knowledge NOBODY wants negativity day in and day out or we will no longer exist. |
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| Author: | Redman69 [ Thu Sep 27, 2007 11:39 am ] |
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AMEN ! |
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| Author: | DrForm [ Thu Sep 27, 2007 12:01 pm ] |
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Good post.It's one thing to poke a little fun at your fellow member but quite another when one belittles and berates another member!We are a club of Caballeros verdad!It's all about respect. |
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| Author: | Professor [ Fri Sep 28, 2007 10:08 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: A Gentlemen's guide to Costa Rica |
Xray27 wrote: Is it me or has there been a huge rise in hostile, personal attack posts recently? I have only been a member for about a year but I don't remember ever seeing so many "brothers" insulting each other. I find myself logging in praying that there will be positive energy and helpful debate and not smears against one another. I am a bit of a newbie and have only met a handful of you guys in person but until now I always had a better vibe frome this site. Just my thoughts...Flame away..... When I first joined the greatest thing about this site was that everyone seemed to be amigos, brothers if u will. I f I had stumbled upon it today I would wonder.......
You are not alone. I have noticed it, too. Every blue moon a response gets an unnecessary snide comment. Hang in there. |
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| Author: | Xray27 [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 2:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
And as it continues I can see it now. Walking in to the SL or DR, the gruops of "brothers" at different parts of each respective venue with their posse and the other ones with theirs. This group hangs with this member because he doesn't like what that other member said so let's just claim our own turf. F those guys over there. Well there won't be enough room in ZB for the infighting yet but not to worry Eddie should be expanding soon. And hopefully (insert name) doesn't find himself in a situation in CR where he could use some backup and (insert online enemy name here) would rather just walk away than help. Pretty sad........... |
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| Author: | Casper [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 11:29 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I am glad to see that there is more attention to this problem. I have come under attack for expressing opinions that some have characterized and "stupid" and "idiotic". This is supposed to be fun. I don't get the animosity. In that vein some ribbing and teasing is appropriate. But some of the nastiness that comes out is a little hard to understand. I think the problem is that with this many members it is inevitable that you are going to get a certain number of guys that are jerks that lack the social skills to disagree in a civilized manner. The question is as a community how are we going to deal with the guys that just can't play nice? Maybe one idea is to set up a separate category for inappropriate posts (call it Jackass Members Court). Lets say PutaBuster is inappropriately negative and calls me an idiot. I can take his quote and place it on the inappropriate post thread and the other members can comment as to either A) Yes, he is a jackass for posting it or B) No, I am a jackass for calling the guy out when I should not have. Repeat offenders would be shown for what they are. Maybe a little more accountability will cut down on some of this stuff. |
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| Author: | Santas Bro [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 1:31 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Wouldn't it just be easier if my judgment didn't have to be right, or the only answer. From boyhood, I was taught that if my judgment was not deemed as right, I was less powerful. A very false assumption I was taught, and bought into, at an early age about being a man. I spent way too much of my life believing that my judgment had to be right. If it wasn't, I beat someone up with words until they either agreed, or walked away. As they walked away, often they would mumble something about a**hole, but I felt strong and powerful anyway. I now see how truly weak I really was. I have since learned that it really doesn't matter if my judgment is right, or wrong, just like the words in this post. It is not data, it is just my judgment which can change instantly, with new data. My life is sailing much smoother since my judgement no longer has to be right, or the only answer. IMHO, don't stress if other men don't agree with your judgment. There is no need to fire back at a person because one does not agree with my judgment, that does not make my judgment right. If it is actually data then it is right, by fact. If it is only judgment there is no right anyway. If you really want to get to your perceived nemesis, kill them with kindness. This technique is not used often by men, and when it is applied, the results can be magical for both parties. In many cases, if not most, we are much more similar than we are different. Feel free to say, or rebut, anything about me or what I have said. The next time I'm in CR (Thanksgiving), let's have a drink and laugh about the crazy old fool that I am. |
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| Author: | Casper [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 3:21 pm ] |
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SB, you hit the nail on the head. That is exactly what is going on here. Unfortunately, not eveyone has your maturity to realize how messed up their behavior is. |
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| Author: | Mucho Gusto [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 3:53 pm ] |
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Santas Bro wrote: Feel free to say, or rebut, anything about me or what I have said. The next time I'm in CR (Thanksgiving), let's have a drink and laugh about the crazy old fool that I am.
Hey you crazy old fool! 
Great post! Should be a "sticky"! Thanks for those words of wisdom. 
Respectfully, Mucho Gusto 
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| Author: | El Ciego [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 6:54 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thank you Xray27. 
And again, Santas Bro...you da man!
Hey, who put this chair in front of my door? 
BTW, as I live in a basement and seldom have contact with mature human beings, if I am part of the problem, I hope someone will inform me that I might repent and improve my behavior. Serious. I really need to learn how to be a grownup sometimes. Thanks. |
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| Author: | Casper [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 7:57 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
There is a big difference between being immature and being an immature ass hole brother! Present company excluded of course .........
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| Author: | El Ciego [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 8:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Kccostarica wrote: There is a big difference between being immature and being an immature ass hole brother!
Present company excluded of course ......... I must respectfully disagree, although perhaps I'm splitting hairs. I think the kind of rancor, insults, bad vibes, cliques etc. recently seen here are all in fact symptoms of immaturity. When you're dealing with guys ranging in age from 21 through 71, immaturity equals being a winking sphincter. Just my opinion. |
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| Author: | Casper [ Fri Oct 05, 2007 9:02 pm ] |
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That was more or less my way of saying the same thing. I am all for the silly stupid humor...... The other stuff that you cataloged is totally unnecessary. This is supposed to be for fun guys! Right? MG has it right, some of these guys just need to get laid more often. It is good that people are speaking up. I am looking forward to an end to it. |
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| Author: | TonyTC [ Sat Oct 06, 2007 2:02 pm ] |
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Excellent post gentlemen... Everyone that has expressed their opinion thus far are known to be helpful, informative, humble about their opinions, and are the VIPs I would like to meet in the future.... When I started posting my trip reports, I noticed very quickly who the smart asses are and who has some pent up animosity... When you try to write something that is informative and entertaining, it does sting when long time posters attack your credibility or question your accuracy... After reading most posts on this site, it is very noticeable who always comes out with smart remarks and constant sarcasm... I haven't met the people I'm speaking of and they very well may be great people to hang out with but their online personality is caustic and demeaning... I think a person's posts reflects their personality whether it's a fun loving guy, a joker, a philosopher, a comedian, a narcissist, or an angry unhappy man... To my fellow CRTers who continue to inform, entertain, pass out cudos, and help foster a positive attitude on my favorite website... Muchas gracias, amigos... |
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