Okay. We might want to make this a sticky. In response to recent events, I've converted the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous into something more suitable for a monger turned novio. Here goes it:


THE 12 STEPS OF NOVIAS ANONYMOUS

1) We admitted we were powerless over our novia --that our lives had become unmanageable.

(This is easy. Her pu*sy is VERY powerful. You are not. Just look at how much bullshit she is creating in your life. Look in the mirror man!!! You're in denial.

If you don't believe me. Pull down her pants and stare at the phucking thing. Notice how you have blotted out just about everything else in the world?)

2.) Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

(Replace "a Power" with CRT)

3.) Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the act of God

( ie. replace the word god with "mongering again")

4.) Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of our novias

(How much money have we given them? How much money are sending? How much bullshit do we put up with? How they pout and complain when shit doesn't go their way? How many other clients are they phucking? How much they will take in the end? The list goes on...)

5.) Admitted to ourselves and to another human being the exact stupidity of our relationship with our novia

(This could be aided by a few beers, while viewing chicas lined-up on the rail)

6.) Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

(Delete her phone number and email. Throw out all of her shit. Erase her memory)

7.) Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

(Go to a strip bar. Get on your hands and knees. And, beg a stripper to sit on your face. Have some humility. Let Go and Let God)

8.) Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

(Make a list of ALL the chicas you want to bang. Be prepared to apologize for NOT paying for their services over the past X amount of weeks or months. Then, phuck them one by one.)

9.) Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

(Make negotiations with new chicas whenever possible. Be careful, because if your ex-novia sees, she might want to injure you, them or others. She really misses all of your money and it seriously is pissing her off.)

10.) Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

(Continue the act of Mongering over and over again. Whenever you are attempted to have a new novia, admit it is wrong)

11.) Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

(Improve your regular contact with a group of various chicas. When you are tempted to go the other way, go to the DR and talk to Vegas Bob and ask for his knowledge and power to continue down the correct path)

12.) Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other gringo novios, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

(This is an easy one too. Spread the word and help out others in need of spiritual awakening)

There you have it...

Great stuff great post . That took some effort .