www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Okay. We might want to make this a sticky. In response to recent events, I've converted the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous into something more suitable for a monger turned novio. Here goes it:


THE 12 STEPS OF NOVIAS ANONYMOUS

1) We admitted we were powerless over our novia --that our lives had become unmanageable.

(This is easy. Her pu*sy is VERY powerful. You are not. Just look at how much bullshit she is creating in your life. Look in the mirror man!!! You're in denial.

If you don't believe me. Pull down her pants and stare at the phucking thing. Notice how you have blotted out just about everything else in the world?)

2.) Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

(Replace "a Power" with CRT)

3.) Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the act of God

( ie. replace the word god with "mongering again")

4.) Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of our novias

(How much money have we given them? How much money are sending? How much bullshit do we put up with? How they pout and complain when shit doesn't go their way? How many other clients are they phucking? How much they will take in the end? The list goes on...)

5.) Admitted to ourselves and to another human being the exact stupidity of our relationship with our novia

(This could be aided by a few beers, while viewing chicas lined-up on the rail)

6.) Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

(Delete her phone number and email. Throw out all of her shit. Erase her memory)

7.) Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

(Go to a strip bar. Get on your hands and knees. And, beg a stripper to sit on your face. Have some humility. Let Go and Let God)

8.) Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

(Make a list of ALL the chicas you want to bang. Be prepared to apologize for NOT paying for their services over the past X amount of weeks or months. Then, phuck them one by one.)

9.) Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

(Make negotiations with new chicas whenever possible. Be careful, because if your ex-novia sees, she might want to injure you, them or others. She really misses all of your money and it seriously is pissing her off.)

10.) Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

(Continue the act of Mongering over and over again. Whenever you are attempted to have a new novia, admit it is wrong)

11.) Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

(Improve your regular contact with a group of various chicas. When you are tempted to go the other way, go to the DR and talk to Vegas Bob and ask for his knowledge and power to continue down the correct path)

12.) Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other gringo novios, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

(This is an easy one too. Spread the word and help out others in need of spiritual awakening)

There you have it...

_________________
http://TipsCostaRica.com for pratical advice on living in Costa Rica.
In order to write about life, first you must live it! - E. Hemingway.

And for those less fortunate among us not able to live full-time in the land of honey:

13) Seek out and regularly avail yourself of the following "spiritual aids"...

Hot Latin pu*sy #36
Buttman's Brazilian Ass Fetish
Latina Fever #1 & 2
Buttman's Ass Adoro
Pretty Little Latinas #27

_________________
Check out http://weluvlatinas.com/ for the web's best info on the latin american monger lifestyle...

Great stuff great post . That took some effort .

_________________
"Run silent, run deep"
Spunk glazed Chicas are the building blocks of the universe!

On behalf of all the afflicted novios, I must wholeheartedly protest this thread. I'm mad. I'm going to PM Admin 1 and demand that this thread be moved to V.I.P. and either deleted or locked.

_________________
Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

Too funny....roflmao

You have got WAY to much time on your hands

What are you trying to do here shake the guys out of the Chicas's BUSHES that are sending money as they run crying to admin 1 !

_________________
"Run silent, run deep"
Spunk glazed Chicas are the building blocks of the universe!

I should know better than to hang out with you troublemakers...but :lol:

Noviaholic meetings are at 5PM daily at the BM with the honorable VegasBob as residing chairperson. Although he usually prescribes the 5 step progressive program- do 5 different chicas, if novia is still on your mind- repeat.

_________________

Living well is the best revenge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwUtj_YnNoY

Actually, it was really easy. I did a copy-and-paste from the internet and added about 15 minutes of comments. It just shows how the novia paradigm EXACTLY mirrors the concept of alcoholism and denial.

The funny thing - this whole concept applies to both chicas inside and OUTSIDE the gulch. As some may know, I'm in a struggle with the latter. Even if they aren't prostitutes, they still view you as soft and vulnerable targets in CR. They constantly try to take advantage of you.

My major lesson to be learned is to have a good time with them, have great sex, but don't take them too seriously.

My second lesson-learned is that the most HONEST relationship a gringo can have with a chica in CR is pure pay for sex. The second you try to change this honest business transaction, you set yourself up for all kinds of shit. In the end, it isn't worth the headache.

_________________
http://TipsCostaRica.com for pratical advice on living in Costa Rica.
In order to write about life, first you must live it! - E. Hemingway.