www.CostaRicaTicas.com

This is a little long so bear with me. I received the following request for money the other day. Before I send my answer I have decided to post the request and my proposed response here for a little feedback. For background I spent more than a week, including several TLNs, with this woman who shall remain nameless. My aim is to let her know I understand her request and where it is coming from, but that I have no intention of accommodating it. However, I have no desire to upset her or cause her distress. I am open to any and all comments, criticisms, suggestions, and especially Spanish corrections.

First, her letter:

Hola mi amor, espero que tu estes bien y que todo con tu hija salga bien, ahorita ando un poco preocupada y triste porque ya se acerca la navidad y no tengo dinero para regalarle a mis hijos. Tu ya sabias algo de esto si tu eres amable quiero que me regales algo para mis hijos, disculpa que te moleste pero en verdad los necesito. No pienses nada malo sobre mi porque yo a ti te quiero muchisimo y tu sabes cual es mi situacion ya que tu conoces mi casa y mis hijos. Bueno amor te mando un beso y un abrazo, espero que regreses pronto, por favor escribeme!
Chao

Briefly she is worried because Christmas is coming and she doesn’t have anything for her sons so she is asking if I can give her something for them because she likes me muchisimo and because I know her situation with her house and her Ch*ldren.

Now my proposed response:

Sé que tú tienes que hacer tu negocio. Por eso no pienso malo sobre ti. Entiendo tu situación con tu casa y tus hijos. También sé que eres muy pobre y que la vida en Costa Rica por una mujer sola con dos hijos es muy difícil.

Sin embargo, sé que casi todas las mujeres en Costa Rica piden dinero de sus amigos en Estados Unidos. Es una parte del trabajo. También sé que te pagué $700 hace un mes. Y que muchos Costa Ricenses no ganan $700 en 3 o 4 meses. También claro que debe haber ganado un poco dinero después de me fuera. No entiendo donde fue más de $700 en un mes.

Por lo tanto, no voy a mandarte dinero ahora. Lo siento.

David

In summary I have responded that I understand where she is coming from, that it is part of her business, and that I recognize her situation in life with her Ch*ldren. But I also recognize that many women in CR request money from their friends in the US, that I paid her well for the time we spent together and I don’t understand where all that money plus whatever else she may have earned in the meantime has gone so I am not going to send her money now.

Comments? Suggestions? Am I being unnecessarily harsh or conversely too easy? I will hold off for a couple of days before sending the response.

My suggestion:

One word: NO.

You can add "lo siento mucho" if you want to feel better.

- B

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gone fishing

Believe it or not that was my first inclination. She is afterall a prostitute. But she is also a person. I have decided to treat her like a woman rather than like a puta.

That's a good plan DG if you enjoy being with her and plan to see her again. Just say no in a nice way and let her know you look forward to seeing her again and will pay her for her time then, but you don't (or can't) send money. She will respect you much more than the guy that does send it (think about it) and from this point will know where you stand on the issue.
And quit worrying about upsetting her, if she keeps on ask her is there any reason she can't go earn 100.00 tonight?

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Living well is the best revenge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwUtj_YnNoY

Good advice PacoLoco. Being a gentleman with women that you like no matter what they do for a living is the correct thing to do. She can only ask and you can only say no in a nice way. Once you will see her again, you and her will forget all about the money she asked you for and go back to having fun. Just my 2 cents.

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"It don't make you a bad person"

That is why I suggested the "lo siento mucho" part meaning "I'm really sorry."

Then you can say "No."

No means no in both languages but you can say I'm really sorry first


Lo siento mucho... pero no.

It's a nice way to say NO

- B

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gone fishing

I treat all the little putas like women, that's why I have sex with them.

Also, I like that you mentioned to her that you are aware of the "game" and you question her on the $700 you already gave her and point out that she continues to work and make money.

But again, I believe we take greater risk getting to know them outside of the business. YOu start believing your "friends" and that maybe she is the 1 in a million. The line begins to blur and before you know it "you're in love with a whore and don't even know it."

YOu know what i'm saying?

It's all a game and the more you know (about her/bebes/family) sometimes works against your kindness and generosity.

You are an american man and you have been programed by a society that no longer produces real men, me included. Whatever that means, but I hope you all get my point. We are not Tico men!

Tell her you have many bills to pay after your last trip and would like to maybe see her again for x-mas. and if it is possible you will purchase gifts for the ninos in the states and personally deliver them to her hijos wearing a red suit and beard.

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"i'm in love with a whore and don't even know it." - Traylor Park

This is a straight-up RFM. I wouldn't even be that polite, because they will keep coming, until she tires. Especially around Xmas. I would say something like this:

Yo entiendo los juegos de chicas de Costa Rica. Tambien, quiero pagarte algo, pero no puedo quando no estoy en Costa Rica. Voy a pagarte algo mas para sexo contigo solomente. Feliz Navidad. -El Scrooge :lol:

Please correct my spanish, but that is easy enough.

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http://TipsCostaRica.com for pratical advice on living in Costa Rica.
In order to write about life, first you must live it! - E. Hemingway.

Did she send the RFM from the Del Rey or Ket Largo?

What was the from IP Adress ( full header)

tis the season... takes money to go to beach and not work

PIDD

.. might be fun to develop a generic response and everyone use the same one for replys..
be interesting to hear the chica chat when they compared notes...

Delaware Guy:

A rational response to a request for money. Either as a group we are learning are we are attracting more intelligent members. Either way you're a good example for others to follow.

Lee

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PS: DO NOT SEND MONEY!

DG,

What got me about this RFM is that it is almost word-for-word to one I received, including the apology for asking for money. "No piensas mal de mi.." or whatever.

I had heard that there are form letters sold in the HDR. This may or may not be true, but aside from the stated financial "emergency," the request is almost verbatim. If you read my post, you'll know that I let myself get suckered into sending money. Maybe it's the Christmas spirit or that I'm a freaking moron. Rest assured it ain't gonna happen twice. Especiallly after I learned from another CRT bro' that he got a simiar e-mail from her.

Paco's reply to this is the best so far, with Traylor Park's a very close second. Listen to these guys, gents. They do know the score.

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Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

Im am not a big poster here but Ive had about a dozen trips to CR and have allways belived when it is time for my flight home its over. Ive had repeat sesions many times with the same chicas but have never given or taken a phone or email I tell them I make money the US @ spend money in Cr dont bother me when Im working.One thing Ive had happen lately is the intro. to their friends and advice of who to stay away from.This so far this has worked out pretty good. I belive our power is we are the consumer they are the retailor make your best deal and go back if you are happy and remember they are the Pros. they do this all the time why try to play in their game.

I appreciate all the replies so far.

Paco: I am trying to accomplish exactly what you describe - to let her know I look forward to spending time with her in the future but will not send money from afar. So it seems my response is composed fairly well.

TP: I get completely what you are saying. I recognize the tightrope I am walking in pursuing a personal relationship fuera de la cama. I also was aware of her likely ulterior motives in inviting me to her house to meet her family. I am not in love with a prostitute. However I am afflicted with the disease which you might have called the American Male syndrome. As such, I have been programmed to fix all things which need fixing, to right all things wrong, and to come to the assistance of all those less fortunate than I. At times these are good traits. At times they can be fatal.

EC: Though I did not put two and two together until just now, I believe your Chilean masajista and my Nica puta are well acquainted. When I walked into the SL October 31 my puta was helping your Chileana compose and send an email. I would not be at all surprised if it was heading your way!

Sending mass emails is part of the business. She will receive some money from somebody,hopefullly it's not you. Many of us have received them,just be gracious when you say no. She won't like it but she will respect you vs. the poor guy that sends her money.

Trust me,you good position with her won't get damage for future lays.Money has a way of doing that

Enjoy!

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Hello..room service? Could you send up some (!) please!

I think your response is polite but firm and very similar to the one I used to use when I still lived in the US. Whether she is sincere or just mass mailing RFMs the response works.

BKTUNA