www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Sorry Orange, But I have to call bull crap on that Maybe the percentage of bad situations goes down but the probability of "BAD" is still very high with any Latina/gringo situation.

We are the "rich Gringo" and they are the "poor little latina" and even the majority of the "GOOD" ones look at a gringo as an economic gold mine!! Exceptions to every rule exist, BUT

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Old and retired but still bang, and bang, and bang!!!

So even when you get a good Tica (not seeking greencard, not to steal your house or your bankroll), it's still bad because we are gringos.

I think the anesthesia from your surgery hasn't fully worn off yet.

Orange I know you think you have a "good one" and I certainly hope you are right and in no way am I trying to say you are wrong!!

Reread what I said: I said "the probability of "bad" is still very high with any Latina/gringo relationship" I did not say "all". and I said: the majority of even the "GOOD" ones look at a Gringo as an economical gold mine". And I said there are "exceptions to every rule"

Now I know you think I am warped and totally wrong (Hell I thought differently also the first 2 years of my marriage to a Latina) and I hope yours works out for the next 100 years!! I am just saying that in many, many cases (and no matter what the background of the chica) Gringo/latina relationships just do not work out over the long haul!!!!!!!!!

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Old and retired but still bang, and bang, and bang!!!

Hate to say it, but I'm pretty sure that the statistics would be on BB57's side.

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You ALWAYS have an option ....... "NEXT" !!!

I hope that your first surgery was successful. Best of luck with the next one and with the recovery. Try not to take too many chances with your eyes over the next few weeks.

I've appreciated your advice in the past at the bar in the SL. Maybe I missed something or didn't read every last word of this thread, but are you talking about all Latina/gringo relationships or just p4p?

I thought I was onto something here lately with local non-pro Latinas in a couple of friends-with-benefits relationships. I haven't been able to get away from work at all (even working some weekends) in order to return to Costa Rica, and I don't have other options since I won't do p4p in the U.S.

A long-term relationship is not in my plans right now, but are you saying that we should avoid non-pro Latinas completely for this? Are you talking about with U.S.-based gringos with Latinas in their own countries (I see the obvious problems with this, either non-pro or p4p), U.S.-based gringos with Latinas who now live in the U.S., U.S.-based gringos with Latinas born and bred in the U.S. or gringos living in the Latin American country with a Latina? Or all of the above? If not Latinas, then who?

I don't have issues with gringas but do find Latinas here in the U.S. to be a lot of fun, whether they were born here or have immigrated. As my Spanish continues to improve, I wouldn't mind living in a Spanish-speaking country either.

I don't know the answer, just curious as to what you meant.

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"All them women gonna make me,
teach 'em what they don't know how..." TMIB

It almost sounds like many are saying that gringo-gringa is the way to go for a successful long term relationship. So how about if all the guys who are in a successful long term relationship with a gringa, please post below.

*sound of crickets happily chirping*

So I guess what we are really saying is that the odds of any relationship standing the test of time are very long. The reasons for failure are as varied as the number of trainwrecks. In my opinion, blaming failed relationships on any single factor is oversimplifying the equation.

And how do we judge success? If I am happy in a relationship for a couple of years before it all goes to hell, was the relationship a success of failure? According to whom?

My point is that our perception of "success" and "failure" are based on our own expectations. If nothing less than a white picket fence, the PTA and the Golden Wedding Anniversary make the cut, then the vast majority of unions should never be contemplated. The percentage of "married for life" couples is infinitesimal and if the word "happily" were added the percentage would be even smaller.

I guess the only way to quantify the success of a relationship would be to add a value for good times as compared to bad times, costs versus gains with variables for intensity and duration. Then someone, long after we're gone, could apply the formula and objectively compare the relative merits of all relationships. Grading would be on the curve...

I guess there are a couple of ways to assess the odds of "success" of a relationship in a more real time way. One would be to compare a vast number of similar unions to reach an opinion. Two problems with this; it does not take any data concerning the actual people involved into account and the "successful" column is so small that virtually nobody makes the cut. Any relationship that is not ongoing is deemed a "failure", along with any other anecdotal relationships that are not accompanied with "happily ever after". Just ask some of the "doomsday scenario" guys on here how many successful relationships they know of (with people who are under 80).

The other way to judge the odds of a successful relationship would be to observe and assess the actual individuals involved, their backgrounds and motivations on more than a superficial basis. Then you would determine whether, in your opinion, they would be better off in the long haul with or without the relationship regardless of how long it lasts.

Some relationships may last a long time and be destructive to both participants the whole way. Other relationships may provide benefits the remain long after the relationship is officially over. Who is to judge whether two people were better off with or without each other.

I do find it interesting that people feel so strongly about the issue that they resort to calling anyone who might dare to go another way stupid or a fool. How many of the advise givers have completely given up on any relationship that is not paid for, any body heat that does not come with a price tag? Or, worse yet, they live a lie at home with the women who rule their lives except for the moments that they can slip away to betray that relationship in CR.

I'll take my chances. Wish me luck!

_________________
"Your love gives me such a thrill
but your love don't pay my bills,
I NEED THE MONEY!" - John Lee Hooker

Disclaimer: The above is merely the opinion of the author unless specific scientific data is included.
Your mileage may vary. https://costaricaticas.com/phpBB2/viewto ... 978#206978

good luck , Pac55

Thanks, I'm gunna need it!

_________________
"Your love gives me such a thrill
but your love don't pay my bills,
I NEED THE MONEY!" - John Lee Hooker

Disclaimer: The above is merely the opinion of the author unless specific scientific data is included.
Your mileage may vary. https://costaricaticas.com/phpBB2/viewto ... 978#206978

And now... the rest of the story.

Gringo goes to fantasyland in a small country known as Costa Rica. Hookers everywhere. He picks out a few and tries them own. Has so much fun he returns several times to the little country. Takes off the clothes... has a wild time with his paid for playmate.... the next thing you know... when he gets the news of his impending fatherhood... he blurts out without thinking... SHIT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PARTY NEKKED!!!

And there you have it... the rest of the story.

Paul Harvey.........

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FRUITCAKE... and you thought it was something you eat! Not on CRT!

Berk, why don't you tell your own story? Too lame, huh?

_________________
"Your love gives me such a thrill
but your love don't pay my bills,
I NEED THE MONEY!" - John Lee Hooker

Disclaimer: The above is merely the opinion of the author unless specific scientific data is included.
Your mileage may vary. https://costaricaticas.com/phpBB2/viewto ... 978#206978

I have been gone all afternoon and was going to post an addition to my previous posts here when I got home. Well it seems that in a way Pac55 beat me to the punch.

I realized that I might be inturpeted as saying that getting involved with a Latina was a lot worse than involment with some other (gringas, Asian, European, etc.). All have their idiosyntric differences and in a relationship, all have their bad points, and I guess, good (I just have not been able to find many of the good points). And, yes, I am fully aware that in all probablility much of the problems lies with me as much as with the mate; Which by the way includes 2 gringas, 1 Asian, and 1 Latina (wives) plus several long term relationships with, Gringas, Latinas, Europeans, and Asians.. All seemed to have some agenda (besides love), and all seemed to change drastically from the person I thought she was when first involved.

I guess what I am saying (and it is just my personal feelings):

Gringa: NO way!!! All they think they are suppose to do is dominate, badger, and ridicule their mate

Asian: Every man thinks he would love a subserviant wife till he has one!!

Latina: many, no matter what their socioeconomic back ground, have been instilled with the idea that Gringos are "ripe for the picking". And how are you going to know till it is too late

Pac posed the question "What is a successful relationship" My opinion is that success is based upon acheiving out of a relationship all, or most, of what one wants and expects when first entering the relationship. And, I really doubt if there are many truly successful relationships.

Statistically, I think the odds are against us no matter where our choise of a mate may be from; and I doubt (thou I have no statical evidence) there is a lot of difference in the divorce rate (%) between a Gringo and ANY other race or nationality--all are relatively low . but I will bet that no matter where she may be from, the odds of success go plumenting down when she is or has been a "working" girl And I know of several casses where the failure was not even HER fault--the guy just could not get out of his male macho mind what she had been, and had done, with sooo many other guys

As for having given up on a meaningful relationship; that brings up another personal pet peive of mine. We on this board call ourselves "MONGERS" WHAT IS A "MONGER" . In my opinion it sure as hell is not a guy that travels to, or moves to CR, or any where else in search of P4P and ends up spending all his time trying to get into a longterm relationship with a chica; and spend hours trying to rationalize his actions to all his friends. It amasses me how many so called "mongers" come here and quickly develop a relationship, and still refer to themselves as "mongers". Yes I have just about given up on ever having OR wanting a lasting true relationship. I know I could never be monogamous (faithful) I love womEn (plural) tooo much To all those "non mongers" who want, or are in a relationship, I envy you in some ways, but mostly I wish you good luck

And finally, Pac55, non of this is aimed specifically at you, thou you are the one that has thrown yourself out there for the wolves to pick to peices. It is just my feelings concerning anyone who confuses "Mongering" with having a lasting relationship; who becomes involved with a working chica; who becomes involved with any chica while living in seperate countries; who becomes involved with anyone whose cultural, ethnic, religious, moral, and or political ideas differ drasticaly from your own. Any of these, IMHO, are stacking the odds against success And PAC, if you will look back thru the posts dealing with the many cases of involment with a working chica, I think you will find that even thou you are the one that seems to keep bringing it up, you have, SO FAR, gotten off very easy compared to most

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Old and retired but still bang, and bang, and bang!!!

<raising hand> I have been with Mrs. Ciego for 27 years. Does that count as an LTR with a gringa? Successful? Well, we haven't yet tried to kill each other. Seriously, she makes me coffee every morning, she makes the bed...and she makes 60% of our income. Plus, she doesn't give me sh*t about traveling once in awhile to C.R., and she knows about CRT, the pros, all of it.

I also have a relationship with Wing Woman that's gone on now for nearly five years. Another gringa.

Perhaps I am mentally ill?

Pac... you better buy a sh*tload of good cigars to distribute on the occasion of the birth of your hijita!

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Pura Vulva! Wandering through the dark, I am El Ciego.

OH Brother!!

1. ALL MY RELATIONSHIPS were succesful. Until they ended. The trick is not to fall for the BS that they are supposed to last 4EVER.

2. BangBang57: Yeah Yeah Yeah...Perdoname pero...you're full of CRAP! you old loverboy...when the right chica comes along you'll be ready to be play the novio!!

3. Pac55: Too much thinking and not enough drinking. You don't have to explain yourself to this lot here. You knocked up a working girl and are dealing with it. IMO like a mensch. 'Nuff said

PR

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Why settle for just one woman when you can enjoy them all?

BB - No offense taken. I do want to address a couple of things you said:


This may be statistically true. Many try to change ho's to housewives and that ain'ta gunna to work. It was never my intention to "take her away from it all". We visit it all several times a week. Her friends are ho's and mongers, just like mine. I don't intend to "rescue" her, she does what she wants.


Now there ya go trying to stick me in the "meaningful relationship" box, whatever that means. I never gave up mongering. I never agreed to any kind of exclusivity nor do I try to force her to be faithful. She is with me because she wants to be and vice versa.

I'm sorry if you see my posts as an attempt to "rationalize" my relationship. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Why would I need to rationalize? My story is "out there for the wolves to pick to pieces" because my girl is an SL girl and we are in the SL a lot. It would be kinda silly for me not to mention that, oh yeah, that's my girl and we are about to have our first.

Since you guys are obviously privy to the fact, I see no need to hide it and, in fact, have nothing to hide. Yep, she's a hormonal 4'11" firecracker, still built like a brick shithouse and still as demanding in the sack as she was the first night she abducted me, nearly a year ago. She is jealous to the point that I have to give detailed reports of what I did even when she is the one who went out! It is many things, boring ain't one of them.

_________________
"Your love gives me such a thrill
but your love don't pay my bills,
I NEED THE MONEY!" - John Lee Hooker

Disclaimer: The above is merely the opinion of the author unless specific scientific data is included.
Your mileage may vary. https://costaricaticas.com/phpBB2/viewto ... 978#206978

I'd say if you're just planning to date non-pro chicas in the US and have fun with them for however long it lasts like kickstand is doing now then any amount of time is a success. Since the topic here is LEGALLY MARRYING a tica and not just dating her or living with her for a couple of years or until things all go to hell (whichever comes first), then I think 2 years would not seem like a raging success to most people given the potential costs involved as exemplified by this story. AND if you're planning to not only tie yourself legally to them through marriage but are also planning to have K*ds with them (which is even more of a long-term commitment) and hopefully raise those K*ds together until they reach adulthood, then I think most people would agree that 2 years barely even scratches the surface. Call those of us who feel that way old-fashioned if you will, but I doubt that many would disagree. If your best most realistic hope is only that it lasts a couple of years, then IMHO you should really reconsider whether you should be having any K*ds with her.

OTOH, I realize that you didn't PLAN to have K*ds and are trying to deal with it as honorably as you can, which I respect you for. I hope for all your sakes that you do much better than the usual life expectancy of such relationships, but please don't portray such a situation as a desirable chance for others to take. IMHO, its much better to: a) take all measures possible to avoid getting a chica knocked up in the first place (that means never doing FS bareback unless possibly you've been snipped) b) if your novia does get knocked up and you know or even suspect that she might be doing other guys, make sure it is yours before you make any commitments (taking responsibility for your own actions is one thing but taking responsibility for someone elses is something else) c) if she gets knocked up and its yours, hope and pray that she'll let you get off just paying for an abortion (I realize some guys might disagree with this from a moral religious perspective, but personally I think that is better than 2 people having a K*D together who really shouldn't) d) if none of that works hope and pray you two stay compatible longer than most couples in similar circumstances because otherwise you will have some very trying times ahead. BTW, this is general commentary and not addressed to you specifically since I don't know the exact details of your particular circumstances.
-----

Getting back to kickstand's question, as to what sorts of gringo-chica relationships qualify as chancey under those circumstances (marriage and K*ds), I'd say all of them. The fact that many 40-50 year old gringos do not stay married to their 40-50 year old gringas either is no great argument in favor of multi-cultural, multi-generational, multi-socioeconomic and educational background marriages. It just means that the odds for those "mixed-marriages" are probably even worse. And its not JUST about whether they come out of a P4P background although that DOES make matters even worse still. It is also a problem with a non-pro who is much much younger than you, came of age at a different time and so has generational as well as age differences, is much more poorly educated, comes from a totally foreign culture with different values regardless of whether they're the same age as you or not, and the fact that they come out of poverty and are probably primarily drawn to you more for the material things you can provide rather than any real deep emotional commitment (and you're most likely drawn to her for her youth and beauty that will ultimately fade). Like BB said this doesn't mean that it can NEVER work or that it doesn't often work in the short-term, but it does mean that the dice are definitely stacked against you for anything more than a few years of wedded bliss. Even more so than for marriages between a gringo and gringa with similar ages and backgrounds.

My best friend here in the US (a Cuban-american) married an attractive well-educated Colombiana who is less than 10 years his junior, just a few years ago and all he can talk about now is divorcing the shrew. And the problem is NOT that she has been americanized. It is some of her latina traits that bother him the most, such as baseless jealousy, a fiery sometimes physically violent temper, inlaws that come over from Colombia a couple of times a year to stay a month or more at a time, no desire to do any work outside the house (and not much inside the house either since her K*D is in high school and the household duties are minimal) or even just take classes to learn to speak English properly. These qualities were not so apparent to him when they got married or at least as much of an issue. And don't get him started on the amount of sex (or lack thereof) he is getting after so many years of marriage. This last one is not so much a latina trait as one that happens in many LTR's, but it would be much more significant in any relationship that was PRIMARILY BASED on sexual appeal from the very beginning as most old wealthy gringo - young poor chica relationships usually are.

BTW, seeking out young good-looking chicas from wealthier better educated backgrounds is not the answer either because in most cases such chicas don't have to (or want to) marry a guy who is so much older than them no matter how much money he has (unless he's filthy rich, but again what sort of basis is that for a healthy relationship). The idea that in the latin culture chicas prefer older men is a myth or at least highly exaggerated. Sure they may not mind it as much as young gringas, they may even prefer guys who are slightly older (e.g. 10-15 years perhaps but rarely more than 20). No chica ever dreams of marrying some guy that is old enough to be their father. Absent a huge financial incentive, tolerance for age differences will usually only take you so far.