IMHO, this thread is a perfect example about men, and how I have been taught by society that my judgment must be right. If my judgment is not right, how can I be the Alpha male? One of the great American fallacies.
IMJ, this thread is nothing but judgment, even what I am writing. The story was written from the second person. Odds are the facts will never actually be known.
What I see in others, is what I see in myself. I used to be the king of using words to make my judgment right.

Words were used by me like swords to cut, I could have cared less if they hurt others, I felt powerful in my own mind, my judgment was correct. I had made my point, and was right, at least from my own narrow point of view. I perceived myself as the Alpha dog, and that made me feel good.
Now my judgement can change even on the same subject, at any given moment, when actual data is given. What if she wrote in and said that she would never go to HDR again(data)? What if she wrote in and said the guy was a chump and she blew the money up her nose (data)? Wouldn't both sides need to adjust their judgments based upon new data. In the absence of data, only judgment exists, and it can never be right, nor wrong. It is just a guess.
I now understand that it does not matter if my judgement is right or not. It is, just what it is, my guess, which contains no data, for if it contained data it would be fact.
I am a much happier person now that I don't have to defend my judgment, or worry about if others perceive it as right.
Feel free to use your judgment, of my judgment, to flame away. As always I have my asbestos shorts on today.
Health & happiness to all...............