www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Here are some general tips of things I thought were useful from my recent trip. If there is something missing please add it to the list. Some of this I took right from the board but was great info that worked for me.

Downsize your wallet-
After settling into your room. Put all of your money and credit cards and valuables in your safe in the hotel room including your passport. Zerox a copy of your passport and take this with you. Only take as much money with you as you are going to need for drinks and food. When you bring a girl back to your room you then pay her from your safe. This way you are not bringing loads of cash around. Also remove most credit cards, license and anything else you don’t want stolen and put that in your safe as well. If you don’t have a safe put your stuff in your bag. On my last trip I was on antibiotics and was not sharp and was pick pocketed or lost my wallet. I did downsize my wallet but not to the extent as I described above. They made off with fifty bucks a couple of credit cards which I quickly cancelled and my license. It could have been a lot worse.

Ipod speakers-
If you don’t have an ipod you are probably rubbing two sticks together to make fire Before I went down there I invested in a nice JBL ipod speaker system that was small and made great sound this was around 80 bucks at radio shack but I saw a set for as little as 12 bucks. I made a nice playlist of songs the girls might like. (CRTers gave me this idea). The girls get much more into it I find if there is good music playing otherwise they will tune to this crappy bad mtv like station on the television. Be sure to put “Shakira hips don’t lie” this is like chica kryptonite.

Taxis
When you get there go to your hotel lobby and exchange some money and get like 15 -20 1000 colognes bills.(Another tip I picked up on CRT). Every taxi you are going to take is going to be around 1000 colognes or less. Don’t take those big tourist van taxis they are just trying to screw you. If you get into a taxi and they don’t start the meter they are trying to Phuck you and tell them to put it on. Otherwise they just make up the price. This happened to me once on my trip a taxi driver charged me like five bucks on the way there and another taxi driver only charged me 1000 by the meter for the ride back. Don’t take the taxis that are parked outside the DR take one that is driving in the street next to the DR. The taxis parked outside the DR want to overcharge you and the ones that are in traffic wont. This happened to me too. The driver was like at this time of night its 2000 to go to the pres. Fah Que Dude….

Don’t bring a nice watch
I have been to Costa Rica twice and both times my watch was stolen. I have a nice $1500 tag watch that I left at home and Im glad I did and opted for my 75 dollar Kenneth cole for the trip. The girls could give a Phuck about what type of watch you have until they take it from you which is what happened to me on my last trip. You don’t need to impress these girls with your nice watch or how well you dress. Just bring your cash. Im not sure who took my watch the maid or a chica but it was in my room one night and gone the next which brings me to my next point.

Chica Proofing your room.
Before you go to the Del Rey take all your shit out of the bathroom and put it in the main room area. When you are done balling the girl don’t go into the bathroom to take off the condom and leave the girl with all your nice shit like your camera, money, watches etc its too tempting for them. Let them go into the empty bathroom by themselves and clean up with the hotel toiletries wait till they leave and then clean up. I just don’t like to leave them alone in the room if Im in the bathroom. Im not saying this to scare people, nothing really bad has happened to me but better safe than sorry.

Buy condoms before going down there.
When I went down there I bought a box of 36 condoms. It was a little overkill and I didn’t come nearly close to using them all and gave some away to some newbie brothers. Try to get some as plain as possible. One girl on my last trip complained that mine made her mouth numb so that was not a good thing. Maybe opt for some flavored ones. Also make sure to bring a bottle of lube as this goes a long way when the condoms start to get dry. I like astroglide. The girls will thank you for it and it will feel tens times better. I also bought a small bottle of baby oil for 99cents in the travel area of CVS. A few of the girls gave me massages and I gave a few of the girls massages (albeit sexy) and the baby oil came quite in handy.

Get out of the Gulch during the day
On my last trip I went to see Gary at the ATV tours and had a great time. I went all day, he picked me up, gave me lunch and we drove all over the phucking place for 80 bucks with the CRT discount. It was just me so it was like a private tour. He is this crazy dude from Amsterdam who smokes a cigarette at every scenic vista. But he phucking lives for atv-ing and he takes great pride in his work. I would like to return in the rainy season when there is some more mud.

If you are looking for some more low key adventures I tried the La Paz waterfall.(aprox 1hr outside SJ). This place is really nice, slightly touristy but you can get some great scenic photos that will be a good cover to show your friends, parents or wife. 

Traveling to the Beach?
If you are not on a tight budget and going to travel you might want to opt for flying. I did this and it was well worth the expense. You can get to Tamarindo for 93 bucks in 45 minutes and this would take you five hours to drive and probably cost you the same. If you are going to drive try interbus or grayline these are little minivan services that are excellent and go every where. I would not rent a car as it is crazy to drive and taxis are so damn cheap.

Finally Buy your departure tax (or as I like to call it the FU tax) before getting to the airport. Most hotels can do this for you or I think you can do this at the bank. If you wait to get to airport you have to wait in a long line even before you get to the line to wait for your flight. It cost like 26 bucks and they only take cash or visa. If you buy it in advance it is one less line you will have to wait in.

Pura Vida

Even better:
If the taxi does not use the maria keep a 500 colones coin and a 1k colones bill in your hand and decide what your going to pay him when you get out. Do no ask what he wants. I had several drivers ask for tip and 2-4k for a trip that is less than 500 colones. I laughed said that I had already overpaid and walked away. When in the gulcth you are always very close to security when you get out of the cab.

Your bathroom should be cleared of all personal toiletries. Just store them in your dresser drawer. Clear the mini bar of mints and cigarettes...even better store them in a safe when you leave the room so nothing is swiped when you get back.

Yes, your wallet should only have enough for drinks and cab fare back. If my shirt has a front pocket I divide the money somewhat and have a couple of bills there. Or at least in another pocket just to be sure.

Take your own brand of american condoms with you!!!! Always keep a few in your pocket so when you use a massage parlour you will have your size and brand in your pocket for use. Idem has a small charge and new fantasy and zona blue does not have large size condoms.

Hire a private driver like Jimmy from the SL to drive you around and get the first class trip while drinking beer and rocking out reggaeton!!

Buy departure tax when you arrive.. The desk is right in front of immagration and take 30 seconds at most.

Excellent advice. Worth posting in the "Newbie's Section," IMHO.


Osogrande

You can't buy happiness, but you can rent it.

Once when I stayed at the Clarion Amon Plaza, I was suprised to learn at checkout that I had a $40 long distance phone bill. I had been careful and never left a chica alone in the room. One chica did take quite a while in the bathroom, then it dawnwd on me - she made the calls from the phone in the bathroom. So here's another tip - if there is a phone in the bathroom (like at the Clarion Amon) I unclip the receiver and place it in the safe. Who ever uses those phones anyway? If you don't expect to use the phone in your room, you can always have the hotel keep the phone off.

Just another suggestion,
Lance

Gary the atv guy ... is he a tall skinny dude with curly hair?

_________________
"With foxes, we must play the fox." ~ Thomas Fuller

When I get into a taxi I ask how much to go where ever and tell him I`ll give him 1000 c ($2) . It is only 500 - 600 with a meter and I always give them 1000c so it`s the same and less hassle .If they don`t think 1000c is enoegh I go to another cab.

Some great advice. A few minor corrections:
1) Save the cologne for putting on your face after you shave or before you go out and use colones for money (just busting your balls)

2) Putting you valuables in your safe before you go out is a good idea and will prevent you from getting robbed of much at either the bar or out on the street. However when you say "When you bring a girl back to your room you then pay her from your safe." make it clear that you shouldn't even have to open that up until you're done with her and she's ready to go. Never pay before sex.

3) I would say that $75 is still too fancy a watch to bring. Unless you're trying to impress someone or need a watch that is accurate to less than 1 minute per year, all you really need is something that tells the time and those can be picked up for under $20. Overstock.com has many decent looking metal watches for $16.99 and I'm sure at Walmart or the fleamarket you can do even better. Plastic watches that look even cheaper would be better still. Anything that looks nicer than what the ticos wear is just thief bait. If you got held up on the street, $75 is better than $1500 but would you really want to give that up either. If you're sporting a cheap $20 watch or none at all, the crooks will probably figure you're not even worth bothering with. Besides, how important is it really to tell time when you're on vacation? You could even make it around without any watch at all. A front desk wake up call or nightstand clock can tell you when to get up, if you don't feel like just getting up whenever you feel like it. Your stomach tells you when its time to eat. And as for meeting chicas, they're never on time anyway.

4) Regarding chemical tasting condoms, you don't want them to be using a condom when they're going down on you anyway. So rather than trying to make it taste better with artificial cherry flavor or whatever (which probably doesn't taste all that great either), maybe a sour chemically tasting condom is actually better for a chica who initially insists on using a cover as she will quickly rip that sucker off. However, you might want to bring some bottled alcohol to help wash off any residual chemical taste off your pecker. As for the main act, taste shouldn't matter (unless I suppose you plan on going down on her later). So always wear a condom for phucking. Condoms lubricated with spermicidal noxynyl is probably best as it also has some antibacterial capabilities.

5) Extra lube is also a good idea as even lubricated condoms can dry out and dry condoms are more likely to break. However it is best to use some waterbased lubricant like astroglide than cheap baby oil as oil based lubricants can break down latex condoms.

Lance, great point about the bathroom phone. I don't think any of the places I've stayed in SJ had bathroom phones, but if they had I probably wouldn't have thought about that one. Which raises the final tip (not that you can really do anything about it) and that is Senor Murphy's Regla, "whatever you haven't thought of or forgotten to do will be the thing the chica will take advantage of"